Funniest Headline in a LOOOOONG Time

From CNN, no less.

“Need” them? For what

, pray tell?

We can’t wipe our arse with them, we can’t eat them, and we can’t wrap them around our faces to protect us from Chinese Lung AIDS.

So what, exactly, is it we “need” them for?

Telling us how “racist” it is to name a virus after its origin as has been accepted practice for centuries (and was accepted practice even at CNN right before their sugar daddies in Beijing told them not to)?

Fueling an already absurd panic with doomsday prophecies based on flawed models built on unknowable data that have been spectacularly wrong every step of the way? Yeah, that helps.

Continuously spewing lies and venom in an insane, manic, obsessive attempt at finally “getting” Orange Man Bad?

Systematically burying any and all news stories that might reflect poorly on their lords and masters of the Democrat National Socialist Party?

“Need” them?

What have they done for us lately or, indeed, ever?

Yeah, we “need” them alright. As much as we “need” a second arsehole.

Fuck off and die, already, but DO fuck off first. We don’t want the stink in here.

Thatisall.

(H/t the Amazing Ace).