And being about as successful as you’d imagine when you think about a pointy-skulled leftist nutwad. (h/t Jeff Goldstein):

It’s the latest chapter of Barack vs. the Health Care Killers, The Continuing Saga of Posturing, Bad Faith, Spite and Ineptitude.

Remember the Bad Years of the Health Care Killers, 2000-2008? No healthcare anywhere. People were dying in the streets unattended to until Our Savior Ear Leader came along and put an end to all that.

Republicans, who have used every trick in their playbook to gum up the works of the Affordable Care Act,

And how remarkably successful they’ve been after three years of “using every trick in the playbook” except for actually opposing it! But why would they? They did make sure, after all, that they would never ever suffer under the same system that they never lifted one finger to stop.

are now holding hearings to investigate how the works got so gummed up.

Yeah. It’s the Rethugnicans’ fault, of course. And Bush. And Glowbull Wormening/Coolening/Climate Change/The Weather/Trotskiy. And any other reason you can think of as long as it does not, in the slightest way, imply Glorious Ear Leader, He Who Maketh the Waters Recede™.

Those cultists are so cute in their slavish, imbecilic adoration of the hand that whips them.

They could save themselves the trouble by looking in the mirror, just as O.J. Simpson could have done to find his wife’s killer. But that would rob them of the chance to grandstand.

In fairness, they do have one point. The Obama administration botched the debut of its insurance marketplace website so badly that it fairly begged for an investigation. And since Republicans had little or nothing to do with the website, the blame for its failures falls squarely on the president and his deputies.

Wait, what? That sounds a whole lot like sedition, comrade!

The screw-up was a gift. GOP lawmakers were calling the law a failure before most of it went into effect, but lacking any evidence they had to rely on mere accusation.

The “lack of evidence” assertion obviously requires one to be wholly ignorant of thousands of years of human history and 100% failure rates for any version of socialism as well as not even the most fleeting of familiarities with the law of cause and effect, economics 101 and any other sort of knowledge rooted in knowable facts. Which makes it positively perfect for “liberals”, seeing as how they are utterly lacking in every single one of those areas.

Now, finally, they can say that their worst predictions had some validity.

True, actually. Even their worst predictions didn’t come close to the actual unmitigated horror of the cosmic clusterfuck that is 404Care. But that’s because they were overly optimistic and, we might add, steadfastly refused to listen to those of us who had a lifetime’s worth of actual experience with socialist hellcare. We knew exactly where this train was headed, and we were absolutely, 100% right. On all counts. Again.

You’d think that people would start to listen at some point. You’d be wrong. The human capacity for refusing to listen to answers they don’t like is infinite.

Nevertheless, Republican “outrage” over the glitches is hard to take seriously. If they’re really looking to find what went wrong — and there was plenty — one suspects it’s only so they can clone the virus. Then anyplace where the law is working, such as Kentucky, Washington and Oregon, they can infect the system, watch it crash, shake their heads and snicker.

Oregon? Where not a single soul has yet to successfully sign up for 404Care, in spite of them having their very own “Exchange?” Which, funnily enough, is yet another excuse for SCOAMF’s latest failure being tested currently, that the only reason 404Care is failing is those Mean Rethugnican states who refused to do the government’s dirty work for them and told them to build their own damn “Exchanges.” Oregon did build their own “Exchange.” And it has yet to find a single subscriber.

Clone the virus? They don’t have to do a damn thing. All they have to do is to sit back and watch socialism fail. Again. Case #3,661.

Come on, folks. Republicans want to “fix” what’s broken here as much as they want to “protect” women by targeting their reproductive rights and “defend” the vote by obstructing it.

Why the hell would they want to fix something that was jammed down the American people’s throats against their will without a single Republican vote?

You break it, you own it. Remember that, Democrat Socialists? You shat on the living room floor. Now go get a damn mop, you puling pricks.

And P.S.: We must have missed the memo where we were told by the Koch Brothers that our opposition to letting women murder their unborn was based on an urge to “protect” the murderers. And yes, Virginia, protecting the vote DOES mean making sure that nobody who can’t legally vote gets to nullify the vote of somebody who can. We understand that you, being a socialist Democrat, think of “protecting the vote” as meaning “the vote of people who shouldn’t be voting in the first place” since they’re your main constituency, but you’re doing it wrong.

But because went live on the same day that the party crazies shut down the government over the law’s funding, they were too deep in their own morass to capitalize on it. Worse, they had to fold on the shutdown without getting anything in exchange. No wonder they’re pouncing on the chance to grill the people whose job it was to enable what they’ve called the worst law in the history of man.

So far it has certainly been the most catastrophically inept, clusterfucked disaster of a rollout in the history of man. Oh, and it was your Ear Leader who shut the government down.

Yes, the administration deserves to be on the hot seat. There was more than enough time to make sure the website worked properly and there is no excuse for its failure to do so.

Mr. Obama had to know that the first weeks would set the tone for public perception. If he had wanted to raise doubts about the program or shoo people away, he couldn’t have done a better job of it.

That’s because he’s an idiot. His barely serviceable intellect doesn’t allow him to actually think about anything other than his vapid promises and lies. Like any inept “leader” throughout history, his skills begin and end with talking about how wonderful he is. When it comes to following up on the implementation of said promises and making sure that his troops are doing their jobs, he’s as out of water as a guppy on Mercury.

And to be quite honest, it’s really not his fault. We mean, how the hell was he supposed to turn out with his background? Raised, in the broadest possible definition of the word, by a dysfunctional, Marxist family, dragged around the globe like a gypsy throughout his formative years by a slut mother who never met a vagrant third world dick she didn’t want inside of her for whatever reason she might have had, and then brought back to a nation running a 104 degree fever with the virus of Affirmative Action under which no Specially Favored Group Member may ever be asked to prove any abilities in order to harvest the rewards. Seriously? If he hadn’t turned out to be one of the most incandescent examples of malignant narcissism in all of history, it would have been a miracle.

Once again, we have to wonder what goes on in his mind.

Nothing. At least if it doesn’t involve the pathological overuse of the first person singular.

This legislation is only the most important accomplishment of his presidency. He put everything on the line for it. Millions of people are counting on it for coverage they cannot otherwise afford.

Which they now, after tripling of premiums (at best), couldn’t afford if they sold their firstborns. But wait, that’s not all, if they don’t buy the insurance that they can now afford less than ever before from a website they cannot access, they’ll be fined out the wazoo for not doing so!

Progress! Forward! #Winning!

If he can’t get the introduction right, well, let’s just say it’s a good thing he’s won’t be running again.

But then there’s that pesky caveat called perspective. A botched website, which can and will be repaired,

You obviously have absolutely zero experience with project management, which we find amusing.

is nowhere near the biggest obstacle to the success of health care reform. That distinction goes to the program’s sworn enemies, who have been conducting a misinformation campaign of false claims and scare tactics since the law was passed. To hear them tell it, “Obamacare” will turn people into devil worshipping socialist homosexual vegetarians who want the terrorists to win. So of course they will do everything they can to stop it.

Yet, to date, they have done absolutely nothing to do so. With the notable exception of Ted Cruz, Mike Lee and a large number of House Representatives who, for their trouble actually doing what they, like all of the rest of the Republicans had been promising in order to get their snouts in the DC pig trough, were immediately attacked, demonized, vilified and stabbed… By their own party. Yeah, that’s one heck of a coordinated effort, right there.

Exhibit One: The quickest and easiest way for states to enact the law’s reforms is to expand Medicaid, which would trigger a huge infux of federal dollars for the first several years. Yet Republican governors in 26 states have refused to do so. The primary excuse is that they won’t be able to afford it once the federal money stops. The subtext is that they’d rather sabotage the president than help their own citizens get the treatment they need.

Er, no. We’re really rather disappointed in you here, seeing as how you, as a raging leftist ne’erdowell slacker, ought to know better.

The real “subtext” here is that they, being able to think further than the tip of their own noses, didn’t want to participate in a program of doling out “free” drug samples to the kids in the local preschool, knowing full well that the sweet young innocent kiddos would be tomorrow’s captive addicts.

Thanks to them, according to a New York Times analysis, the new law will leave out two-thirds of the nation’s black citizens and single mothers, and half of the low-wage workers who currently lack insurance.

Well if it’s in the New York Pravda, then it must be true. Did they check to see if those individuals happened to have some overlap with the group of individuals who weren’t insured before 404Care? Did they include the 16 million people who had plans and doctors they liked, yet have just been told that they can’t keep them thanks to 404Care? Did they include the millions of young people who used to have no insurance beyond catastrophic because they A) didn’t need it and B) couldn’t afford it? The ones who still don’t need it and still can’t afford it, but now will be fined by the IRSchutzStaffel for opposing His Obamaness’ Will?

Did they do any analysis? Of course they didn’t. Yet the “facts” are in: It’s the Republicans’ fault that people who were already uninsured have lost the insurance they never had.

Got that. Brilliant. Spoken like a true leftist invertebrate.

In addition, GOP governors (including our own Tom Corbett and, regrettably, a few Democrats) have refused to create insurance exchanges that would facilitate reaching the uninsured. Instead, those people will have to go to the federal exchange.

They’re also refusing to assist applicants and blocking the use of so-called “navigators,” whose job is to help people understand the law and sign up for its benefits. When a constituent calls with questions, they are making sure they’ll get no answers.

Oh, you mean the “navigators” who, subject to no background checks whatsoever, are deemed trustworthy with the most personal information of private citizens? Whereas people who simply want to exercise their 2nd Amendment right to carry arms have to submit to a Federal Anal Probe in order to be allowed to do so.

Totally unreasonable. We mean, why would anybody have a problem with handing over their SSN to somebody who might, until yesterday, have been working a child prostitution ring and a credit card scam for all that they know? Absolutely the Republicans’ fault for being unreasonable.

Then there was the government shutdown, during which Republicans offered more than 40 measures to cripple the law. They failed in every sense, but it still cost the country $24 billion.

They offered a number of ways of reaching a compromise which, under the true definition of “bipartisanship” as opposed to the socialist version which means “giving the Democrats everything they want for nothing in return”, is what negotiation is all about. As to your “cost?” The only reason it “cost” anything, if you want to use measures that can actually be, you know, measured, was because the Republicans agreed to pay the “workers” who’d been shut down for their extra vacation. So yes, we guess you’re right. It was their fault.

It doesn’t take a genius to see where the real obstruction lies. For all its screw-ups, the Obama administration is trying to make health care reform work.

And after 3 1/2 years of trying, they have made no progress at all. It’s hard to make water run uphill, after all.

And for all their public posturing, Republicans are trying to ruin it. But the law was duly passed, it’s here, and it’s not going away. They should save the fake righteousness for a cause that isn’t already lost.

Oh, your “law of the land” has already failed and it will go away when it’s destroyed under its own weight, just like every other socialist experiment. It has, indeed, failed even before it had a chance to go fully into effect, which just might be a first although, we dare say, not one you should be bragging about.

It’s just a matter of time. What can’t go on, won’t go on. The “point” of opposing a horrible “law” is to mitigate the disastrous consequences of it which, to our mind, is a noble one.

We can either make a clean break with socialism and the hundreds of millions of lives it has cost right now, or we can wait and add a few million of our own dead to the butcher’s bill.

Because it will fail.


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By Emperor Misha I

Ruler of all I survey -- and then some.

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