As in “gayer than a tree full of monkeys on nitrous oxide?”

Since there apparently is a new standard in place established by the OgabeMediots and the equally Idiotarian members of the “pragmatist” and “fair” “right” wing punditocracy that all unsubstantiated accusations against a Republican candidate must, must be given a fair hearing (but if you’re still wondering why Ogabe’s college transcripts are hidden you’re just a NUTTY, RACIST, UNHELPFUL VISIGOTH CONSPIRACY NUT!!!!1!!!), then we suppose that it only stands to reason that this, too, ought to be given a few months of wall-to-wall agonizing, front page, full frontal stupidity coverage. After all, we’ve now learned that the only reasonable way to deal with accusations is to assume guilt until innocence is proven.

The linked article is full of good stuff, we’re only quoting snippets here, so you’ll have to go read it all. You won’t regret it if you do.

Fair’s fair, right — in love, politics, and what’s apparently allowable in the 2012 election now that all-out war was declared on the black Republican presidential contender. Why shouldn’t conservatives treat Barack Obama the way the Left treated Herman Cain? If the operating assumption is that anything whispered about by anonymous sources is true about Herman Cain, then I guess everything people in Chicago have talked about for years related to Barack Obama being a closeted gay man into younger Pakistani guys must be true too, right?

Absolutely. After all, how can we know that he’s innocent unless he’s proven it first? Let’s hoist the Chicago Queen by his own petard.

During the 2008 election, I campaigned for Hillary Clinton in the Democrat primaries. Repeatedly, I heard over and over here in Chicago that Barack Obama is gay and that his marriage to Michelle is one of mutual convenience. In the black community, this is called “being on the down-low”, where a closeted gay male weds an often-times gruff and demanding woman (typically without other male suitors of her own) to take public scrutiny off them both and afford the pair a successful life they’d never achieve separately.

There are, apparently, a lot of such relationships forged at Trinity United Church of Christ in Chicago — where Barack Obama’s pastor, the Reverend Jeremiah Wright, oversaw the coupling of down-low gay black men with sour and caustic black women.

It certainly would explain why anybody would willingly marry something like Moochelle Antoinette Testicle Shelf O-Bong-Bong. At least if shotguns aren’t involved.

You remember Larry Sinclair, right? He’s the man the agenda-driven media worked overtime to destroy and did its level best to silence because he posed a direct threat to the narrative the Left needed to push for Barack Obama to elect him president — and needless to say, that narrative didn’t include Barack Obama receiving oral sex from another man in the back of a limo in Chicago.

We particularly remember how this didn’t warrant endless coverage including press conferences presided over by Gloria All-Red but, quite frankly, at the time we didn’t think much of it. It was one lone dude making an unsubstantiated allegation and, at the time, we rather believed that innocent until proven guilty was the Law of the Land.

Of course, that has all changed by now and, as they say, when in Rome, do as the Romans do.

To the media, it’s true just because it was said about a Republican. Meanwhile, Democrats can always get away with murder. Just ask the Kennedy family about that.

We would but, thankfully, they’re most of them very satisfyingly dead themselves now.

Why shouldn’t this week be all about talking about Barack Obama being gay and having sexual misadventures with men, since if it was a Republican president there’s no doubt the agenda-driven media would have been all over this story, regardless of who, if anyone, would go on record to confirm any of it.

Why not indeed? Why isn’t it in the “public interest”, which the Lame Stream Mediots hide behind all the time, to find out whether or not president Poofter likes his vice versa, so to speak? More importantly, why is he so secretive about it? Why won’t he just come out and admit it? To paraphrase the media campaign against Cain, “all of this would go away if he’d just come out and admit to it!”

Ahhhh… Witch trials and Soviet show trials come to mind. It’s all the accused’s fault because he or she just won’t admit to their guilt and be executed like Good Germans™.

Isn’t it strange that the public’s never been introduced to A SINGLE GIRLFRIEND that Barack Obama ever had in high school, college, law school, or the days before he met his beard wife Michelle?

“Strange” doesn’t quite cut it. As somebody who’s been a male teenager and college student himself, His Imperial Majesty would have to say that it’s downright unpossible. “Young, dumb and full of cum” comes readily to mind when we think about our own insane, Y-chromosome driven youth. Not that we regret it, good times all, but we’re pretty damn sure that if we were to run for office, trying to find some damsel whom we’d either bedded or tried to bed would be just about as difficult as getting your fingers wet while traveling up the Mississippi in a canoe.

Hmmm… The good folks at HillBuzz are on to something here.

So come out of the closet already, Hussein. We don’t really have a problem with you preferring to take it up the Khyber Pass, but why so secretive about it?

It would certainly explain why you react like a PMS’ing schoolgirl every time your subjected to any sort of criticism. Embrace your inner emo teen girl, President Poofter, you’ll feel better for it.

Of course, this could all be a load of malign, slanderous hooey, but by today’s standards it’s up to YOU to disprove it.

So go ahead. Do it.


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By Emperor Misha I

Ruler of all I survey -- and then some.

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