Now that Irene has officially made landfall, it’s time for our calm, collected and utterly unemotional Hurricane Response Team to send a public announcement to the northeastern provinces of the Empire:
*** WEATHER ALERT FOR THE NORTHEAST FOLLOWS *** TO LCS OF THE NORTHEAST, GET THE FLYING EVERLOVING FUCK OUT OF THE WAY!!! THIS IS NOT A JOKE!!! *** TRANSMISSION ENDS ***
They’re nothing if not succinct and to the point.
No, a Cat 1 is not just a tiny little fart with nothing to worry about, in spite of what you may have convinced yourselves. Particularly not when it hits an area with little to no experience of what to expect. Yes, we know that you’ve heard numerous examples of people on the east coast of Florida and the Gulf Coast to the south hanging in there and toughing it out while living to tell the tale. Most of the time. Sometimes they earn a Darwin Award or two as well.
But they know what to expect since they’ve likely been through a couple of them before. They know the structural integrity of their surroundings, the expected reach of tidal surges etc. and they still manage to get it wrong on occasion.
You don’t have that experience, so kindly do us all a favor and stay safe instead. There is nothing “cowardly” about jumping out of the way when a freight train is coming down the tracks that you’re standing on.
Err on the side of caution and, above all, stay safe. Please.
Hang in there.