Every time we think the Smarterest Prozi In the World, the Hildebeest, can’t possibly say anything more stupid than the last time she lowered the bar, she rolls out the backhoe and does it yet again. It’s marvelous to behold!

Clinton defended raising the minimum wage, saying, “Don’t let anybody tell you that raising the minimum wage will kill jobs–they always say that.”

Because that’s what they always do. Not because we “say” it, but because math.

Wages paid by an employer is the number of employees times their wages. If their wages go up (and the employer’s revenue doesn’t, but by all means do tell us about Congress’ new “Minimum Revenue for Employers Act” if we somehow missed the memo), then the grand total the employer has to shell out to meet payroll does as well, meaning he can either cut jobs, raise prices (which will then eat up everybody’s “pay raise”) or go bankrupt.

#2 and #3 aren’t really options, for those of you who went to Prozi school and thus fail to grasp basic economics. Or anything else, for that matter. OK, #2 might be, but it would sort of defeat the whole purpose of raising wages which, we thought, was to allow people to buy more stuff.

People like buying stuff. But there’s not much fun in having $20 more to buy stuff with if stuff just got $20 more expensive.

Math is science. Aren’t we always told that Prozis “love science?”

Much the same way the Imperial First Canine loves pickup trucks, apparently. She loves chasing them, but she’d be utterly fucked as to what to do with one if she caught it.

But that’s not the dumbest thing the Hildebeest said. This is:

“Don’t let anybody tell you that it’s corporations and businesses that create jobs,”

Those same corporations and businesses that pay the wages for the, er, jobs.

This is the Smartest Womyn in the World™?

According to Prozis, she is. Maybe it’s just us, but if we were a woman, we’d consider it a mortal insult that those slack-jawed neofascists consider us dumber that her.

"Me smart! Me BRILLIANT! "
“Me smart! Me BRILLIANT! “

We will grant, however, that’s she’s demonstrably smarter than the window-licking hordes who elected the only life form provably dumber than her president. Twice. But they weren’t all women.


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By Emperor Misha I

Ruler of all I survey -- and then some.

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