Schadenfreude, Thou Wilt Be the Bane of Me…

Seriously, at this point we’re beginning to think they’re doing it on purpose to make us die laughing. Which, granted, is a damn sight more pleasant than the death we’d otherwise face as the death panels put us on nil per os to starve us to death.

So we heard that the Sebelius Road Show (no, not the composer, sadly) went to Florida to demonstrate the full battle readiness of their awesome Healthcare.gov battle station to a bunch of Fawning Floridians.

Which, given Frau Mengele’s previous experience with her Frankensite, she probably shouldn’t have done.

At a second table, the secretary met Carmen Salero who was trying to sign up online. As the secretary and Salero made small talk, CBS4?s Brian Andrews noticed the site crash on the lap top in front of them.

“The screen says I’m sorry but the system is temporarily down,” Andrews pointed out. “Uh oh,” responded the secretary. “That happens every day,” said Salerno, “it must mean a lot of people are on there trying to get coverage.”

Salerno was then escorted off the premises by six guys in suits, never to be heard from again. The crack HHS SWAT team is still searching for the three obvious GOP “users” who sabotaged the website by trying to log on at the same time.

Speaking of said website: Did you know that, with only 10 days to go until it’s supposed to be 100% functional, sorry, 80% functional (we can’t quite keep up with those goalposts. They’re just moving too damn fast), maybe as much as 70% of it has finally been finished!? Yay! Of course:

The back end is where an applicant’s information, including payment information presumably, is transmitted to the insurer he signed up with.

The “back end” is part of the 30-40% that isn’t quite, you know, finished. So you can’t actually pay for the plan you may or may not be able to successfully put in your shopping cart (leading to another BEHOLD OBAMACARE, ONE MORE INSURED! from the Democrat Socialist Media), meaning that you won’t actually have insurance, but just shut up racists. You would think you’d say “thank you.” Ungrateful bastards.

Which is probably better for you anyway, considering the gaping security holes on ObamaCare.dumb, the closing of which also fall under the unfinished part. But not to worry. It’s all in The Best of Hands™.

No wonder that ObamaCare suddenly isn’t being called ObamaCare anymore:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kXRm0yVyn7k[/youtube]

So for those of you keeping score (and you’d better, comrades) “ObamaCare” was racist, then it wasn’t, and now it’s probably racist again.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

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readerjp
readerjp
November 20, 2013 23:39

2 items for your delectation: After meeting with several Obamacare Navigators who openly encouraged our undercover reporters to lie about income status, health history and more, it became clear that personal data was also being “cross-pollinated.” Enter Enroll America, a Sebelius-linked group dedicated to signing people up for Obamacare and Chris Tarango, Texas Enroll America Communications Director who Project Veritas… Read more »

Orion
Orion
November 20, 2013 23:59

So, it sounds like they’re 70% of the way to having a website that will allow you to…. Log in. So, 70% of the way to the Rott, with no content. Just a log-in. Grreeeaeattt. These guys are pulling a late-night C at Web design 101. Maybe they’re working on scaling the log-in front end so it’ll handle a few… Read more »

LC hilljohnny
LC hilljohnny
November 21, 2013 00:52

it’s finished, it’s just not finished-finished. I mean it is probably doing everything Mr. Obama hoped it would, you know wrecking the healthcare system, dragging down the economy.

Tallulah
Tallulah
November 21, 2013 02:07

Even the Liberal Asshats are freaking out. Just WAIT until they get “rogered” like the rest of us when their employer-provided insurance is ripped out of their lives.

Sweet Lord, let it be so.

And then let the Patriots carry the day and repeal these chains of slavery.

Mark12A
Mark12A
November 21, 2013 12:10

When they said it was finished, they were speaking expansively. It only means that when it gets up and running the country’s finished.

Just Another Random Nut, GLOR
Just Another Random Nut, GLOR
November 22, 2013 14:08

So apparently Sebelius is now planning tp push back the opening of open enrollment one month, to November 15th – so you won’t see the sticker shock until after the midterm elections.