Shockingly Stoopid

Literally – W. Va. Man Electrocuted After Shooting Down Power Line To Steal Copper

 A man was electrocuted when he picked up a live power line that he had shot down in order to steal copper from it.

Another low information voter meets his much overdue demise. And there was much rejoicing and revelry in the Empire!

Fayette County W.Va Sheriff Steve Kessler says the man’s body was found Wednesday in Thurmond.

AP, Your Reporters suck – we want details damn it! Was he still jitterbugging to the music of a 400KW jolt? Did he go snap-crackle-pop? Details people, details!

Kessler says the man and an accomplice planned to strip the line of its copper wiring to later sell as scrap metal.

The best laid plans of Mice and Men often go awry, in this case “Men” might be pushing it a bit – worthless cunt-muffin (H/T Niki) bottom feeding meth head tweaker , probably is closer to the truth of the matter. Really, do you KNOW any one else so blindingly Stoopid as to even dream up a screw ball scheme like this?

Kessler says the man was killed instantly when he picked up the power line.

Failed that class in Electronic theory Mr. Darwin candidate? You know the little bit about a live circuit remains live until both ends of it are removed from the power source? Sucks to be you. or more accurately sucks for you because you just became that circuits ground source….Ooooopsie. Pay attention next time instead of dreaming up little fantasies about Mary-Jane Rottnecroch – wait that’s your sister…you sick bastard.

His name wasn’t released pending notification of relatives.

Oh to be the cop or public official that has to break that bit of bad news to the demised soul’s relatives…. I couldn’t do it with a straight face.

Hello? Yes, Is this Bubba’s Mother?


Ma’am, my name is Officer Frenziedly? I’m uh- well I’m afraid I have some bad news…. I *chuckle* I’m sorry *snort* Ahem, Your – ah *giggle* offspring – bubba? um, well he died.

Oh Noes! How could this be – Oh-OPooooooooooor Buuuuuubaaaaa !!

Yes- Guffaw – I’m sorry, he died of a case of terminal Stupidity. BWHWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA…Excuse me– I am TERRIBLY sorry *snort* for your loss Ma’am.

Media outlets report the accomplice was charged with an attempt to commit a felony, conspiracy to commit a felony and disruption of a public utility.

One out of two- Damn the bad luck! Is it a felony to attempt to commit a felony I wonder?

We can only hope – that way said accomplice should spend a good few years in the grey bar hotel. Maybe- but with the right bleeding heart judge and lawyer he’s likely to plea it down to a disorderly conduct or other nonsensical charge, spend a weekend in the local hoosegow and be out by Monday. Our justice system is a riot I tell you.

Of course your intrepid Foreign War Correspondent is a glutton for punishment – I’ve got this mad compulsion to read those comments on the webpage below the article itself. I’m weak, I admit it – I can’t help it.

And of course, it doesn’t take long to find, amidst the ‘normal’ reactions of “Good Riddance & the fucker got what he had coming to him” there’s always that hand wringer – the “humanitarian” wailing about the injustice of it all. And in a 100 words or less said poster pissed me off enough to want to put a bullet in their brain pan. I really need to quit reading those comments man….

I see moral decay of society when we laugh at a tragedy like this. …

Moral decay is it? But I betcha a dollar – you’re just all warm and fuzzy about light sentences for criminals aren’t you twinkle toes?

Right, let’s not be too harsh on the poor misguided lad – New flash! That mentality you just espoused? That’s what causes “Moral Decay” you fucking mouth breathing moron..pandering and babying these cretins and the millions of their fellow travelers, not holding people accountable for their actions creates moral decay. What doesn’t create Moral Decay – Be it in a court of law or a violent Darwinesq removal of a low life like this from the gene pool – is when people are held responsible for their actions – Moral Decay is arrested dead cold in it’s tracks.

We should ask why ANYONE should need to steal in a world of gross abundance hoarded by a few.

Give me my free shit !

Here’s a novel concept – why don’t we ask the question of what give this cock-knocking asshole the right to steal? “Need to steal” My ass he CHOOSE to steal – he died. The world is less one more asshole Obama Supporter –  The End.

“Horded by a few”  – fuck you ….how’s that sound? People have – well most of us have, what we have because we EARNED it, we WORKED FOR IT  you mental midget. Now go put a gun in your fucking mouth – put your booger hook on the bang button and PULL…. oh yeah I forgot…please make sure the thing is loaded.

I am not espousing collectivism or communism here.

Yes you are – “From each according to his abilities to each according to his needs” Sound familiar jackass? Accusing  hard working and successful people of “hoarding” and demanding that we even consider that we ask WHY there is a “need” to steal is exactly what that is.

There is NO need to steal -get it?  Try working – Try not putting a spike in every vein you have – try not smoking meth until your god damn teeth fall out. Then talk to me about a “need to steal” – till then kindly shut the fuck up- because frankly, you wouldn’t be able to define a “need” if it bit you in the ass.

I am saying, how shameful when we laugh – this guy was maybe just trying to feed his family… maybe he had a little boy or girl and a wife and lost his job and was at wits end. Maybe he did not want to hurt anyone by robbing a bank or store or whatever

Nothing shameful about it – or hadn’t you noticed that SOME folks are just about fed up with the stealing – the raping – the killing by these fucking low life scums? When one gets taken out in a display of abject ignorance and willful stupidity – we tend to rejoice and giggle a bit – be glad we do it too because it’s like a pressure relief valve – other wise we’re apt to start taking matters into our own hands and the streets would run red with blood. THEN you can really whine about the moral decay and the lack of compassion. Won’t that be nice?

Lost his job – if he had one in the first place (which I highly doubt)- in The Brave new Obamanomics world ? Say it ain’t so- and WHO GIVES A FLYING FUCK IF HE DID?!

I know at least 3-4 posters right here on this little Blog -O-Doom that lost their ways to make a living – they didn’t feel any bullshit “need to steal”…go figure.

We should give him a pass because of it? Nope. Sorry, Not me. You know why? Because you do what you gotta do to make it – NO one owes you a fucking living asshole. Gotta go out and cut grass and pull weeds 16 hours a day to make it – I suggest you get too it. Because there is no NEED to steal – in fact to disabuse you of that notion I have a locked and loaded 9mm sitting on my coffee table and a .12 gauge behind my bedroom door – try me on the whole need to steal idea….go on.

And for fuck’s sakes already – can you spare us the faux “lets make a poor downtrodden hero out of a scum bag” Robin Hood meme  here will you? People trying to feed their families – find a way – they don’t go shooting down power lines to steal the cooper out of it for their next hit of meth.

Can’t say if he was at his ‘wit’s end’ or not – I suspect he was none too witty  to begin with, so luckily he didn’t have to go far to find the so called “end of his wits”- see my comments on basic electrical theory above.

In the end an asshole got his just deserts – a drag on the rest of us is gone  – What’s not to like in this story? I neither weep or feel the least bit sad over it – he got what he had coming to him.



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single stack
single stack
May 10, 2013 03:54

What I don’t understand about stories like this is how they identify the accomplice. He just watched his buddy flash fry his innards and he stuck around? Seriously? If they were after copper they shot down the wrong line. Correct me if I’m wrong but I thought they stopped using copper for power lines years ago. Other utilities like telephone… Read more »

Igor, Imperial Booby
Igor, Imperial Booby
May 10, 2013 04:23

Single Stack, LOTS of old power lines out there, lots are still copper. Of course, the mouth-breather probably (almost certainly) couldn’t tell copper from aluminum from brass from steel. Lead, on the other hand…

Here’s a good one from 2009:

Yeah, it’s like that…

May 10, 2013 06:43

Evolution in action.

LC Old Dog
LC Old Dog
May 10, 2013 07:17

Lets see here! 1. Dumb enough to fuck with live transmission lines. 2. Dumb enough not to ride the line route in their car long enough to determine the feed side. 3. Dumb enough to not do a Hot Check with a spark object (metal held in a non-conductive glove)! Yep, we got us a Darwin Award Nominee right there!… Read more »

LC Sir Clambake, Imperial Black Ops Technician, K.o.E.
LC Sir Clambake, Imperial Black Ops Technician, K.o.E.
May 10, 2013 09:19

LC IB CiSSnarl5.7 Imperial Foreign War Correspondant says:

Igor, Imperial Booby @ #:2

Day-um ! Extra Crispy !
LC IB CiSSnarl5.7 Imperial Foreign War Correspondant recently posted..Shockingly Stoopid

:em05: :em05: :em05: :em05: :em05:

May 10, 2013 10:45

Ah, natural selection, you gotta love it…..

May 10, 2013 11:21

The Lord works in mysterious ways!

Fa Cube Itches
Fa Cube Itches
May 10, 2013 16:16

Personally, I blame Futurama and Bender Bending Rodriguez for this tragedy. Obviously, the poor soul thought he was a robot and was just attempting to emulate “jacking on”.

May 10, 2013 16:33

this could set a trend and we get to bring back old sparky!

LC Gunsniper
LC Gunsniper
May 10, 2013 18:18

We should ask why ANYONE should need to steal in a world of gross abundance hoarded by a few.

My guess would be a raging meth habit.

May 10, 2013 21:05

Major League Stupid. Lack of attention to detail. Didn’t think it all the way through.

But… I can top it.

Imperial Grammar Nazi, G.L.O.R
Imperial Grammar Nazi, G.L.O.R
May 10, 2013 21:55

Talk about going full retard…and, not to pick nits, but he’s not a Darwin Award nominee; he’s a Darwin Award WINNER!!!

LC SecondMouse
LC SecondMouse
May 11, 2013 10:17

From everything I can see, business should be good for the Darwin Awards for the foreseeable future. And he may be dead, but he will be a Democrat voter for years to come, so he’s got that going for him.

May 11, 2013 18:42

Fayette County is about an hour or so from me. We call it Fayette-Nam. This story doesn’t surprise me in the least. We went to a dog refuge there once and there were about five 20-something employees sitting in the office area, one of them had put the long leash (you know, the kind that’s about an 8 ft. long… Read more »

LC Spare Parts
LC Spare Parts
May 12, 2013 11:17

Previous stories said he shot down that power line. He could have shot something edible, but when you’re too lazy to clean game and can’t cook, matters get complicated, not to mention, liquor stores don’t accept rabbits or squirrels as legal tender. Yeah: Shocks to be him. As to why the accomplice didn’t just exit stage left, we can only… Read more »

May 12, 2013 11:58

I **NEVER** grow tired of Tales of the Burning Stoopid. That’s why I’ve started blogging them. . . .

(Warning: Explicit Blog Pimping. . . .)

Just Another Random Nut, GLOR
Just Another Random Nut, GLOR
May 12, 2013 15:08

LC Old Dog @ #:


Darwin Awards don’t accept these types anymore. Several hundred people worldwide die every year doing exactly this – frying themselves trying to steal copper or zinc out of electrical installations.

VonZorch Imperial Researcher
VonZorch Imperial Researcher
May 12, 2013 21:44

One less Democrat. And thus the gene pool is, slightly, improved.

LC Xystus
LC Xystus
May 12, 2013 23:37

Them’s what y’all call crispy critters!