If Liberals Hated Pisslamists Half As Much…

…as they hate the Constitution and everything it stands for, The Long War would have been over 8 years ago. (And most of the pisslamic world would be a heap of glowing ashes).

The New York Whines (yes, they just earned themselves a new name) is apoplectic about this whole “return to Constitutional principles” thing, sneering and condescending as best they can:

A theatrical production of unusual pomposity will open on Wednesday when Republicans assume control of the House for the 112th Congress.

And we pause to recall the utter silence from the New York Whines when their Lord God Ogabe had his coronation in a Styrofoam Greek temple or when House Stretcher (Ret.) Lugosi had a bacchanalia that would have made Bacchus himself blush when she was sworn in as Speaker.

A rule will be passed requiring that every bill cite its basis in the Constitution. A bill will be introduced to repeal the health care law. On Thursday, the Constitution will be read aloud in the House chamber. And in one particularly self-important flourish, the new speaker, John Boehner, arranged to have his office staff “sworn in” on Tuesday by the chief justice of the United States.

We’re not sure where the “particular self-important flourish” of having your staff sworn in by the highest Justice in the nation to remind them of their Constitutional duties and Oath comes in, but apparently swearing allegiance to anything other than Child Emperor Narcissus’ testicles and Karl Marx is pomposity of the worst sort to the communists of the New York Whines.

Those who had hoped to see a glimpse of the much-advertised Republican plan to revive the economy and put Americans back to work will have to wait at least until party leaders finish their Beltway insider ritual of self-glorification.

They must also have missed outgoing Speaker Lugosi’s six and a half hour speech about how she single-handedly caused the oceans to recede, made the deficit disappear, passed a healthcare law that will eliminate disease forever, cured cancer, guaranteed 176% employment, brought about eternal world peace and saved American taxpayers $497 quadrillion just by getting up in the morning.

At least if they understand the actual meaning of “self-glorification.”

The empty gestures are officially intended to set a new tone in Washington, to demonstrate — presumably to the Republicans’ Tea Party supporters — that things are about to be done very differently.

They’d damn well better be. Because if it does turn out to be mere empty gestures, then there are millions of us out here with plenty of tar, feathers, hemp rope and an abundance of lamp posts more than willing and able to teach them a little lesson.

But it is far from clear what message is being sent by, for instance, reading aloud the nation’s foundational document.

No, you wouldn’t understand. You’re liberal fascists, after all.

Is this group of Republicans really trying to suggest that they care more deeply about the Constitution than anyone else and will follow it more closely?

It would take very little effort indeed to follow the Constitution more closely than liberal fascists. Just reading it would qualify.

In any case, it is a presumptuous and self-righteous act, suggesting that they alone understand the true meaning of a text that the founders wisely left open to generations of reinterpretation.

No. They. Didn’t. You sad sacks of shit. Your utter lack of comprehension of even the most obvious of facts never cease to astound us, but it does serve to explain how you ended up in a profession that requires no cognitive skills whatsoever.

They actually went to great lengths and spent a long time discussing, fine-honing, re-wording, discussing some more in order to make sure that it wouldn’t be “reinterpreted” by future imbeciles and wannabe tyrants. They had every reason to be specific, having just fought a long, bloody, ruinous war against a bunch of tyrants ruling by the principle of “the law says whatever we say it says whenever we choose to say it.”

And when you craft a document based on the core principle of “this is what the government can do, this is what they can never do and the rest is left up to the People”, you have to be very bloody careful that it can’t be misinterpreted.

They did their best, but one of the things they truly could not predict was that there’d come a time when people, thanks to the efforts of publik skool sistems not qualified to teach gerbils how to fornicate, had an average IQ of 70.

Certainly the Republican leadership is not trying to suggest that African-Americans still be counted as three-fifths of a person.

Yay! They managed to play the Race Card™ again! We were beginning to wonder how long it would take them.

OK, you Cosmically Cluefucked Cuntheaps of Cockheadedness, we’ll explain it to you: You actually just hit your own “argument” right below the fucking waterline.

You see, the Founding Fathers DID make a provision for people to, one day, decide that a previously agreed upon matter of Constitutional Law was fucked up.

It’s called “The Amendment Process.” Look it up. And, lo and behold, that’s exactly how our nation, in saner times, finally managed to eliminate the inhumane practice of slavery and “some people not being quite as much people as other people.”

Which, by the way, is quite the exact opposite of what liberals then did in the 20th century when they re-instated the principle of some animals being better than other animals through abuse of the courts. See “hate crimes”, “affirmative action” and too many other examples to even bother mentioning.

There is a similar air of vacuous fundamentalism in requiring that every bill cite the Constitutional power given to Congress to enact it.

Heaven forbid that legislators should actually bother to research the Constitutionality of a law before deciding that we have to pass it to see what’s in it! Much better to just dismiss questions along that line with a sneering “are you serious?”

The new House leadership says this is necessary because the health care law and other measures that Republicans do not like have veered from the Constitution. But it is the judiciary that ultimately decides when a law is unconstitutional, not the transitory occupant of the speaker’s chair.

Would it not make sense, though, for the legislative body to actually familiarize themselves with the Constitution and find justification for their legislative ideas before putting it to a floor vote? If nothing else, it just might save us decades of appeals if the overpaid whores in DC bothered to do their homework before letting their flaccid dicks and ignorance hang out for all to see.

All of this, though, is simply eyewash — the equivalent of a flag-draped background to a speech —

You mean, like this:

Oops. Sorry. That’s completely diff’runt!

compared with the actual legislation the Republicans plan to pass. And though much of that has no possibility of being enacted, it does suggest the depth of the struggle to come. The bill tauntingly titled the “Repealing the Job-Killing Health Care Law Act” has nothing to do with increasing employment and will never reach the Senate floor, but shows that the leadership is willing to threaten the hard-fought access to health care for millions of the uninsured, just to make a political point.

Because, to the New York Whines, the claims by their Lord God Ogabe that OgabeCare will increase employment to 150% and save us half a trillion dollars a second is simply gospel!

No actual argument needed.

On budgetary issues, the House Republicans’ new rules bypass the chamber and even their own Budget Committee to give all power to set spending levels to the committee’s new chairman, Paul Ryan of Wisconsin. It is hard to imagine how long such an aggrandizement of power will last in a contentious body like the House. The plans by Mr. Ryan and his colleagues to simply cut all spending back to 2008 levels also have no chance of being enacted.

We’ll see about that AND the future of OgabeCare. Either way, anybody who truly gave two shits about democracy would surely like to have such issues put to a vote so we could see, right out in the open, whose side everybody is on.

Which excludes the entire staff of the Volkischer Beobachter New York Slimes, of course.

The one good thing about these meaningless rules and bills is that they finally seem to be prodding House Democrats into standing up for their own programs as they enter the minority.

Mheh. You got THAT one right at least. But not in the way that you’re hoping for.

Democrats have begun to remind Americans of what is at stake in repealing health care:

They begun reminding us of that two years ago but, in spite of two years of lying, massive support by the OgabeMediots and about 16,438 speeches by Ogabe his own eternally accursed self, it STILL had a solid opposition among the people, the ones who used to matter, hovering around 70%.

But keep fucking that chicken, please.

popular provisions like the elimination of lifetime coverage limits, insurance under parents’ policies up to age 26, and coverage for pre-existing conditions.

Not quite as “popular” among the vast majority of Americans who will actually have to pay for them.

The Republicans’ antics are a ghastly waste of time at a moment when the nation is expecting real leadership from Congress, and suggest that the new House leadership is still unable to make tough choices. Voters, no less than drama critics, prefer substance to overblown theatrics.

The People rests its case.

Thatisall.