We Get Presents!

And, albeit that it’s not quite as magnificent as getting a PayPal Alert that the Imperial Tip Jar has triggered a DHS Suspicious Possible Terrorist Massive Funds Transfer Alert™, we’ll take it. Of course, it does mean that we won’t have Governor whatsisface to kick around anymore. But, then again, we were barely aware that he was even in the race in the first place.

CHARLESTON, S.C. — Jon M. Huntsman Jr. informed his advisers on Sunday that he intends to drop out of the Republican presidential race, ending his candidacy a week before he had hoped to revive his campaign in the South Carolina primary.

Ah. THAT’S his name! “Hunts-something”. Oops, we already forgot again.

“Hoped to revive his campaign in South Carolina?” We do know that hope springs eternal in the chest of mortal man, but isn’t that stretching it a bit? A northeastern liberal hoping to surge to the front in South Carolina? It’s much like hoping that “Santa Ana” will surge to become the most popular name to give your infant in Texas.

Mr. Huntsman, who had struggled to live up to the soaring expectations of his candidacy,

“Soaring expectations?” Among whom, exactly? Oh yes, this article is from the New York Times, without whom nobody in the whole damn nation would have even known he was running.

made plans to make an announcement as early as Monday. He had been set to participate in an evening debate in Myrtle Beach.

Matt David, campaign manager to Mr. Huntsman, confirmed the decision in an interview Sunday evening. “The governor and his family, at this point in the race, decided it was time for Republicans to rally around a candidate who could beat Barack Obama and turn around the economy,” Mr. David said. “That candidate is Gov. Mitt Romney.”

Well knock US over with a feather! How unexpectedly! And here we had “soaring expectations” that he’d be endorsing Rick Perry. We’re in complete shock here. Who could have possibly foreseen?

Buh-bye, Huntsman “Juggernaut”, and don’t let the door hit you where the Good L-rd split you. If you’re planning on making another run in the future, it might help if you started adopting some actual conservative policies first. Just saying, ‘s all. Oh no, that one’s a freebie. No need to grovel.

Thatisall.

LOOSE SHIT OR “GOT MY DICK CAUGHT IN THE FACT CHECKER” UPDATE: As both LC readerjp and Southern Libertarian point out to us, there is nothing northeastern about Governor Whatitsface, being a Utah transplant from the Peepul’s Republik of Kalifornistan. We claim advanced age and pre-senile dementia on that one. OK, you got us. Happy now? Good job. On the other hand, it only goes to show just how much of an inconsequential nobody he is, not to mention that we’ll maintain to our dying day that he’d fit in perfectly with the Peepul’s Collective of Taxachusetts. Nobody would even know that he wasn’t from around there.

Alright. Enough bad excuses. Didn’t do our Imperial Homework there and, besides, not fair to blame that twit on the northeast as well.