Articles from January 2014

Suffer the little children

Source Lunches seized from kids in debt at Salt Lake City elementary By lisa schencker Up to 40 kids at Uintah Elementary in Salt Lake City picked up their lunches Tuesday, then watched as the meals were taken and thrown away because of outstanding balances on their accounts — a move that shocked and angered

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The State of the Union…

is abhorrent. But we all knew that already. I didn’t watch the statist cock sucker’s Orwellian diarrhealooza. His condescension and  arrogant narcissism is to much for me to stomach anymore. Five years of watching him succeed in his desire to knock our beloved republic down a few notches has removed any ability to objectively, or

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Deej Started It

Well, sort of. My contribution to the weekend frivolity. A man is driving down the road and his car breaks down near a monastery. He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, “My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?” The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner,

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A Blogiversary

Rusty over at My Pet Jawa, or The Jawa Report, or whatever he’s calling it this week, is celebrating 10 years of blogging excellence and fatwa’s today. Head on over and spill some grog on his carpet, he likes that. Be nice though, he’s kin. A shout out to Emperor Misha of the Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiller.

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I’m Speechless

I’m just gonna leave this rancid display of Stoooooopidity (capital S multiple ooooo) here for y’all to play with. I really don’t now what’s worse, this former community organizer’s incoherent mental diarrhea, or the abject wasteland of mental flotsam and jetsam of the idioacracy that elected him. [youtube][/youtube]

On the Occasion of His Imperial Majesty’s Birthday

And no, you don’t get to know how many times we’ve celebrated our 21st by now. Suffice it to say that when we were in the service, “Centurion” wasn’t the name of a battle tank, it was a rank. But seeing as how we can’t deny the fact that you can’t keep on being 21

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Speaking of Congrats…

A little birdie (OK, a huge fucking albatross, same thing only different) reminded me that it is a certain Vile Imperator’s birthday. I would advise against asking how old he is though, he’s out of ewoks to wipe his ass with and has been a bit grumpy as a result. If you have hair on

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Congrats all Around!

We interrupt the regularly scheduled outbursts of cynical sarcasm to bring you the news that our sestrichka Nicki now has herself her very own Marine, her daughter Sarah! And to let you know we can’t believe that it has been that long since she went off to Parris Island. OORAH!

Fat Old Bald RINO Most Certainly Gone Insane

Imagine what His Imperial Majesty thought when he read this baffling bullshit, fresh from the flapping jaws of RINOcrat Karl Rove. “I don’t think the tea party is going to seize upon Fort Lee and the George Washington Bridge as their defining difference for Chris Christie,” Rove said. “In fact, I think his handling of

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Great White Whale Harpooned. RINOs, Hot Air Hardest Hit

There might be a tautology or a pleonasm hiding in that headline. Sorry about the frequent absences, His Majesty has been a bit under the weather. That and bad news, but not to worry. We’re still here, it’s all good and it’ll be alright. Did we mention “don’t worry?” Yeah, we know how you are,

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Jugears Ogabe Nominates Mumia to Head DoJ Civil Rights Division

Not quite. It’s “only” the asshat race-baiting fuckwit who got his death sentence overturned. Ear Leader might as well have gone all the way. Now watch as the GOP and the rest of the country takes another obvious jab in the eye from the Marxist cuntmuffin and roll over. OK, they’re going to issue the

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The Salt of Your Bitter, Disappointed Tears… It Nourishes Me…

We know we’re probably going straight to hell for this, but we just can’t help it. It just brings tears of laughter to our eyes when the progressive retards who have been huffing unicorn farts for five years finally get the bill in the mail and realize that There Ain’t No Such Thing As A

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News From Post-Racial Obamerikkka

Oh, and we’re sure that it has nothing to do with NYC electing a bona fide communist, weak-on-crime mayor either because RACISTS! Don’t follow this link to a story about a poor black girl being set upon by a gang of white RACISTS, slashing open her face from hairline to chin with a razor unless

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Klimate Klownshoes Kicked In Krotchskys (Or “How Many Crows Can They Fit Into That Pie?”)

Just when we thought that the Circle-Jerk du Soleil: Klimate Klusterfuck show was over, Mother Gaia pulls on her Size 15 Mexican Roach Stompers and delivers yet another swift kick to their frozen groinal regions. Xue Long notified AMSA at 1pm AEDT this afternoon it has concerns about their ability to move through heavy ice

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The Continuing Adventures of the Clitanic

It’s already covered in the post below by our very own Imperial Torturer (if you lazy buggers bothered to follow the link, that is), but we thought it worth mentioning that the Australian ice breaker, Aurora Australis, has given up trying to rescue the Gorebull Wormening Cultists from themselves and their incandescent idiocy. The Aurora

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