Via Powerline (h/t LC Intellectual Conservative)

Anyone who spends half his day talking will misspeak, inevitably; here, though, Obama mispronounces “corpsman” twice, obviously on purpose

We have to dispute the “on purpose” claim. It’s not on purpose, at least not in the “I meant to insult people” way. It’s just that King Narcissus really is that skull-meltingly, mind-bogglingly ignorant. The upside is that he has no inhibitions when it comes to putting his incandescent ignorance on display every time he opens his piehole. That’s some “great oratorical skills”, right there.

Really, King Obamandias, how fucking knuckle-draggingly stupid can you be? We’re asking this because, every time we think that you’ve finally plumbed the vast and pitch dark depths of your own lack of book learning, you manage to prove us wrong, yet again. And trust us, the bar we’ve so far set for your intellect is so low that we had to drill for several weeks to get it down there.

Can’t you get one miserable little thing right in the disastrous string of epic failures that we know as your public appearances? Would it be too unbearably much to ask of you to appear on the screen, just once, without burdening the Imperial Physique with debilitating bouts of paroxysmal laughter?

No, pronouncing “corpsman” as “corpse-man” is not an honest and common mistake, at least not to those of us who actually passed English 101. At this point, we’re doubting that you even attended. Look it up. “Corps” is, and will always be, pronounced “core.” It doesn’t matter if you append a “man” to it. Or do you also think that it’s called “The Army Corpse of Engineers?”

At this point, had you been somebody of at least average intelligence, we’d be advising you to keep your yap shut about things you have not the faintest comprehension of, lest you make yourself look quite the bumbling, functionally illiterate fool that you so verily are, but we also realize that putting that limitation upon yourself would preclude any utterances from you on any subject whatsoever, and if there is one thing that we have learned about you, it is that the moment your voice box stops producing odd, barely intelligent sounds is the very same moment that we’ll notice a cardboard tag tied to your big toe.

The only thing more painful than having to listen to an intellect as far below par as yours pontificating on subjects that you have no knowledge of whatsoever, and believe you us it is painful since we have a famously low tolerance for fools, is having to read even your critics starting their criticisms with words praising your oratorical skills since, for reasons unbeknownst to anybody with a functioning brain, it has become Conventional Wisdom that you’re a “great speaker.”

So far, we have seen absolutely zero evidence for that statement. If we were to grudgingly acknowledge any skill whatsoever in your oral flatulence, it’s that we’d agree that you’d make a fairly pleasant voice-over for auto insurance commercials. Or, for that matter, anything that has been written for you, requiring no skill from you other than the ability to read.

Today, we learned that said written material had better been written phonetically or you’ll find a way to mangle that menial, robotic task as well.

Thatisall.

This entry was posted on Friday, February 5th, 2010 at 12:53 am and is filed under Idiotarians, Obamessiah. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.