Fresh Meat

But, Muh COLLUSION!

Our breathless wait (yawning isn’t breathing, is it?) for a conclusion to Herr Müller of the Gest… er, FIB’s “investigation” into Trump/Russian COLLUUUUUUUSION™ has finally ended as we learn that Herr Müller of the Reichssicherh…, er, FIB has heroically indicted no less that 13 (THIRTEEN)…

Russian Facebook trolls.

Yes, that’s right boys and girls, after wasting a year of our time and countless millions of our tax dollars, Herr Müller of the Keystone Kops has come down with an unenforceable indictment of a dozen Russian memesters, shitposters and trolls. For the crime of, we suppose, trolling teh Intarnetz while Russian.

Next, expect Herr Müller and the Stas…, er, FIB to indict everybody who ever posted a rare Pepe on 4chan.

Your tax dollars at work, ladies and gents.

Thatisall.

Instant Bark

Let’s try this for a few days.

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Well, In My Defense I Was Left Alone…

… And I could no longer in good conscience leave Helen Thomas at the top of this page.

Besides, I crack up every time I see this photo.  I knew it was only a matter of time before someone took the troll dolls from fifty years ago and update it like this.

Journalistic “Standards”

When I teach a concealed weapons class I always stress to my students to be extremely wary of how the presstitutes describe new firearms laws when they roll out, and to read the statute for themselves. For example, if a person relied solely on the “media” in Florida for their knowledge of firearms laws, they would mistakenly believe that warning shots were legal. Yes, you read that right.

Anyhoo, I present the latest example of pure media ignorance; or bias, depending on how charitable you’re feeling.

Prayers, pews, and pistols. Guns could soon be allowed inside churches and religious institutions across the state.

Hate to break it to you sparkle tits, but they already are you dumb-ass, so stop your hoplaphobic hyperventilating. They’re “allowed” (As you so slyly stated in your statist code Al. Look up “prior restraint, lack thereof in American jurisprudence”. ) in as much as houses of worship are not on the list of restricted places according to FSS 790.016. Unless the priest, pastor, or rabbi says no, as is their right under private property rights, a citizen can carry a legal weapon in any church he wants.  Not, I say again, NOT, illegal.

Unless that is said church or synagogue has a day care center or school on the property. In that case, zealous prosecutors could, and I stress could, interpret the law as prohibiting firearms there under the proviso barring firearms in schools. The statute as written could be artistically stretched to mean any church that has any school at any time, even when said school is closed. So, the Florida legislature is looking to change that and solidify the law and the understanding that, yes Virginia, there are guns in the pews. And yes, private property rights too; as in the right of a priest or rabbi to not prohibit those guns if they so chose. I know at least one priest that does. Wink wink.

Simple enough right? Well, not to the GFW’s looking for sensationalist headlines.

Proponents say it could save us from the bad guy when seconds matter most.

But it’s also causing controversy and debate.

Only with the Damn Yankee transplants and kumbyah types.

“Now you actually have people seriously saying that we should arm all the parishioners…

Nobody’s saying that you mewling liberal, except for you apparently.

What a prescription for violence,” said Rabbi Barry Silver, Congregation L’Dor Va-Dor.

No, a defenseless population is a prescription for violence, one sided though it may be. Hey Rabbi, does this prescription for violence look familiar? Or maybe this one? Does this look familiar? So much for Never Again I guess.

Rabbi Barry Silver, leader of a synagogue in Boynton Beach, is not happy with a bill being debated in Tallahassee.

Of course he’s not.

If passed, it would allow a person with a permit to carry a concealed weapon to bring a firearm into any church, synagogue or religious institution in Florida.

As previously stated you nitwit, they already can. But there’s some ambiguity the legislature wants to address. Basic research dude, try it some time.

“It’s a pretty sad day when we have to have guns in churches. It violates everything that churches and synagogues stand for,” Rabbi Silver said.

Depends on what your church or synagogue stands for I guess;  this or this. I remember some Old Testament stuff where King David wasn’t exactly a pacifist. Try Psalm 144:1 for starters, it’s a personal favorite. And if my catechism serves me, St. Michael the Archangel doesn’t exactly carry an incense stick and energy crystal.

Rabbi Silver says guns should never be welcome in places of worship.

What about the sheepdogs who carry them Rabbi? Are they welcome? 

“To bring it into the church and the synagogue, the very places where we should be telling people to not rely on weapons, is a horrible idea,” Rabbi Silver said.

What are we to rely on then dear Rabbi? Does God not provide us the tools to do his will? Do we not have the knowledge of good and evil so that we may protect and defend? Are we not Soldiers of God enlisted to fight evil when it rears its visage? Should we be defenseless sheep to be led to the slaughter? Did God not say that we are not to be offered as sacrifices, neither to him nor to the false idol of a statist utopia?

Pastor Mark D. Boykin at the Church of All Nations Boca Raton supports the bill.

“We feel that for us as a church, it’s our responsibility to protect our constituents,” said Pastor Mark D. Boykin, Church of All Nations Boca Raton.

The shepherd with his staff, keeping the wolf from the flock.

He says at every one of their worship services, there’s always at least one armed person inside the church.

But, but, but….Al Pefly just said that was illegal?! I’m confused, the media wouldn’t mislead me, would they?

Anyway, I guarantee you there’s more than one.

“We deal with a lot of people who come in off the streets. They come into the sanctuary and some of them can say some very scary things…

Like Allah Akbar?

Just sayin’.

 

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Great Moments in National Socialist Hellcare

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Older Chewing Bones