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  • Rules To Become An Evil Overlord...

    “I will not imprison members of the same party in the same cell block, let alone the same cell. If they are important prisoners, I will keep the only key to the cell door on my person instead of handing out copies to every bottom-rung guard in the prison.”

    View another Rule
  • DJ's Just Shoot Me Now Chat

    Latest Message 0 minutes ago
    LC 0311 crunchie I.M.H., LC Fmwoods01, LC George, Apocryphal Prophet, LC LOBO, LC Roguetek, LC Rurik and 1 guest are online.
    • LC Roguetek : crunchie, et al, are we paying attention?
    • R6 : quote "and I can block you assholes"
    • Barth Dacron : :D
    • Barth Dacron : I remember you went totally apeshit on him one night in the Bark
    • LC Roguetek : and what, pray tell, was his reasoning?
    • LC Roguetek : oh -really-.
    • R6 : Yep
    • Barth Dacron : Enjoy your new gun!
    • LC Roguetek : he.... blocked your IP?
    • LC TerribleTroy, I : Nite.
    • LC LOBO : Later Marcia.
    • R6 : I was kinda mad about it.
    • Barth Dacron : Later, MMM
    • LC Roguetek : later, marcia
    • Marcia : Lobo & Gents, is late and I'm off to bed. G'nite
    • LC Roguetek : he did what now?
    • LC Roguetek : I think the worst penalty for bitchsmacking deej is a trip to the colusseum.
    • Barth Dacron : ...
    • R6 : Yeah, he whacked my IP
    • LC Roguetek : no, he was saying 'while I think I'm about to get banned, let me say what I -really- think'
    • Barth Dacron : I don't mean to be a dick- I'm just asking.
    • Barth Dacron : Wait, R6- weren't you recently gnashing your teeth over DJ, saying you were never coming back to the site?
    • LC Roguetek : if he doesnt get kicked in the junk on a regular basis, he gets all whiney.
    • LC TerribleTroy, I : It also appears the rocket science has a depression in his skull (frontal lobe) that makes him very susceptible to death by bitch slap
    • LC Roguetek : R6 - it's ok, he needs it.
    • LC Roguetek : shit, you could do impressionist art, just by connecti ng mine.
    • R6 : I went off a little again on deej.
    • LC Roguetek : burn scars? like I need more.
    • BC, Imperial Tortu : Imagine some poor, third-stringer ho has to be off-camera during the midget shoots, keepin' their socks pumped up for a pittance. :lol:
    • LC LOBO : No Bacon, cooking..
    • seagoon : depends who the people are Lobo, Jerome (guy on the cover) has the world record for deliberate brandings :D
    • Barth Dacron : Yeah, working with fire lessens the appeal of burning yourself for fun
    • R6 : good. Fuck him Troy
    • LC LOBO : Fuck that shit, I got enough burn scars for three people.
    • LC EFA : you need to install a mirror on the roof of the bark to get him in here BC
    • BC, Imperial Tortu : C'mon out of hiding, you midget fluffer!
    • LC TerribleTroy, I : Hey R6.. this will make ya feel better.... right now.. as we speak.... the is a demon .... cornholing Murthas DEAD ass while sing the Marine Corp Hymn
    • BC, Imperial Tortu : Crunchie!
    • BC, Imperial Tortu : Ok. While there's a stove and anything heatable handy...
    • LC Roguetek : you know, peace-symbol man looks a bit cold there.
    • seagoon : I was a blacksmith...
    • R6 : latent anger.
    • seagoon : fire- branding is my thing
    • LC Roguetek : something about the way that lower is shaped just... fits my hand perfectly.
    • LC LOBO : Sup Ranger ?
    • LC TerribleTroy, I : Ah man.. You had a much better gig that I did..
    • BC, Imperial Tortu : Damn, SG. Remind me never to pass out at a Fest while you've got sharp instruments available. :lol:
    • LC Roguetek : I dunno. the one pistol that fits in my hand -nice- is the EAA/TZ/CZ family.
    • R6 : yo
    • Barth Dacron : I spent a summer demo-ing guns at Aberdeen during college, TT
    • LC Roguetek : and funny as hell.
    • LC Roguetek : the origional.
    • LC Roguetek : «link»
    • LC TerribleTroy, I : Where you work with em Baco.. I was a role player out at the chantilly training center
    • seagoon : you did ask...
    • BC, Imperial Tortu : It's the San Fran Scrotum Dude! «link»
    • seagoon : and I did the scars on the cover guy
    • Marcia : We've only had the H&K for 4 days. Soon as all this snow melts I'd like to try it side x side with the P229
    • seagoon : I'm actuall in that one
    • seagoon : «link»
    • LC LOBO : I just want the gun to fit my hand.
    • Barth Dacron : I used to work for HK- I know firsthand what hateful dicknockers they are.
    • LC Roguetek : mind you, I suspect there's a link between H&K ownership, and masochism.
    • Marcia : GREAT! Picked up the .40 and it just balanced so nicely. Fell in love instantly.
    • Barth Dacron : You're going to love it forever
    • LC Roguetek : ahhh yes, HK. because you suck, and we hate you.
    • Barth Dacron : Marcia, until two months ago, I carried one of the first 100 HK USPs in the country, since 1994. Never ONE single malfunction in 16yrs
    • seagoon : and had a side business as a scarificationist...
    • LC Roguetek : suuuuure. we believe you. really. -honest-.
    • LC TerribleTroy, I : Ok... I can honestly say.... I dont need to see any of that SHIT no more
    • seagoon : did my degree in anth of the body specializing in urban body mod
    • LC Roguetek : barth, c'mon, Dont Ask, Dont Tell, remember?
    • seagoon : researching
    • seagoon : I went to modcons 2 & 3
    • Barth Dacron : WTF were you doing there, seagoon?
    • seagoon : Shannon's loft in TO
    • LC Roguetek : but yeah, I'm thinking about offloading it.
    • seagoon : I think
    • Marcia : We just bought an H&K .40
    • seagoon : I saw a guy get his cock subincised in that very loft
    • BC, Imperial Tortu : If the fuckin' 8o smiley would work, I'd be usin' him.
    • LC Roguetek : it just doesnt fit my hand right.
    • LC TerribleTroy, I : I have a favorite gun in the whole wide world...... its the one that goes bang when I need it too
    • BC, Imperial Tortu : I'm still cringin'...
    • Barth Dacron : TinyURL, BC ;)
    • BC, Imperial Tortu : Do NOT click this link. «link»
    • Barth Dacron : Smiths are awkward
    • LC TerribleTroy, I : They've all said the same thing to me...." They didnt knwo what they did to deserve me"...
    • LC Roguetek : didnt have to.
    • LC Roguetek : and... I dont like it.
    • Barth Dacron : Did you polish the sear?
    • LC Roguetek : shoots purty, -nice- trigger, works good, big pile of spare bits.
    • Barth Dacron : So you said
    • LC Roguetek : so, I rebuilt a nice S&W model 659 generation 3.
    • Marcia : I'm dying over here laughing so hard!!!
    • seagoon : girls do pay, in the right clubs
    • LC TerribleTroy, I : bwow chika bwow bwow...
    • Barth Dacron : Ask her psychiatrist!
    • Barth Dacron : My ex is STILL paying! :LOL: HAhahaha
    • LC Roguetek : um... actually...
    • Marcia : Girls never pay.
    • Barth Dacron : It's only torture to make us see the pics
    • LC LOBO : I was in a college town....
    • LC Roguetek : hell, in some places you have to -pay- for that kind of treatment.
    • Barth Dacron : And making guys get naked and form a pyramid isn't torture either- because it happens on street corners in Man Cram Crisco
    • BC, Imperial Tortu : Now he wears 'em under his skirt, Marcia.
    • LC TerribleTroy, I : You moms skivvies dont count as "panties" LOBO
    • Marcia : Used to? You're among friends.
    • seagoon : in person
    • LC LOBO : I used to put panties on my head for free.
    • seagoon : I ahve seen truly cringeworthy stuff
    • LC TerribleTroy, I : These guys and thier hobbies.... I relieve my destruction energies by shooting things
    • seagoon : hey, I went to modcons 2 and 3
    • seagoon : Troy, you are a man of singular pursuits
    • Barth Dacron : Just like putting panties on a guy's head isn't torture, because people pay to have it done to them in NYC
    • BC, Imperial Tortu : I channel my destructive urges into "environmental restoration"... I set the countryside on fire and get paid to do it. :D
    • LC TerribleTroy, I : midget clown dungeon PRON!!!
    • Barth Dacron : So long as someone is paying for it.
    • seagoon : I'm just not spelling today
    • seagoon : dungeon
    • seagoon : or a 'dungeoun'
    • Barth Dacron : It's OK to thrash someone, so long as it takes place in a 'gym'.
    • Barth Dacron : I channel my formerly destructive urges into acceptable things now, like Judo and Krav
    • LC TerribleTroy, I : No Marcia.. No I was at the meeting where we formally recognized the custom.... BC is correct
    • BC, Imperial Tortu : Strictly for verification of their accounts, ya' know. They're deleted immediately upon being vetted.
    • Barth Dacron : But I reformed up good! :P
    • Marcia : Nice try BC. That was one impressive college type try. Does it ever work?
    • BC, Imperial Tortu : Oh, and it's a well-known custom around here that the new female LC's are obliged to send pics of their boobs to me at bc@nicedoggie.net. :D
    • LC TerribleTroy, I : I told to fuck off at 15.... Judge emancipated me.... got GED at 18... if I'de known how esy the test was I would hae taken it @ 15.... I walked in took it blind and passed
    • Barth Dacron : What else is there to be into?
    • Marcia : Right. You guys are into boobs. Like I don't have one of youse guys here in my house.
    • Barth Dacron : *stage whisper* don't forget to warn her about the boobs!
    • BC, Imperial Tortu : Nice!
    • BC, Imperial Tortu : Shit! I forgot to mention boobs!
    • Marcia : Imperial...my friend...why do you think I'm here?
    • Barth Dacron : But I managed to make it out with my class :D
    • LC TerribleTroy, I : Oh & dont forget the BOOBS
    • Barth Dacron : I almost didn't make it either. 4 years in a tent in a swamp, reformin'
    • BC, Imperial Tortu : Mizz Marcia, you'll have to get used to guns, boobs, booze, boobs, butts, boobs, cars, boobs, politics and boobs being discussed regularly if you're gonna be visiting the Bark on a nightly basis. :D
    • LC TerribleTroy, I : six years approx.... class of 81...cept of course I hadnt been there for three by that time
    • Barth Dacron : Clown pr0n- that describes Silky Pony's Shag-tape
    • LC TerribleTroy, I : Oh clown pron.... gotta float a comment bout that least once a hour on the bark... we do it for the google bot
    • BC, Imperial Tortu : :lol:
    • Barth Dacron : HS class of 87
    • Marcia : Me? 30's? Sure. Let's say that
    • Barth Dacron : fo-tay
    • BC, Imperial Tortu : Midgets? Where?
    • LC LOBO : Rogue, I'm not gonna piss on his grave, I'm gonna drop a deuce on it.
    • LC TerribleTroy, I : Yeah ... Im 46 and your mid 30's right?
    • Marcia : and we've come full circle back to clowns and midgets!!! Nicely done!

    You must be a registered user to participate in this chat. Please Log in or Register first.

The exact opposite of Murthafucker, LC & IB Major Bryan is up and running from A-stan and has his first post up. He told me in an e-mail that 20 hour days isn’t real conducive to active blogging. I would call him a pussy, but I ain’t one to talk to lately :-)

In any case, he’s hoping to do one or two posts a week, and knowing the good Major as I do, they should be very insightful. If any of ya’ll read him on a regular basis prior to his latest deployment, be sure to check back in with him again.

Comments 2 Comments »                                              

He once wore the same uniform I did. And he betrayed that uniform, besmirching the honor of my beloved Corps.  For that, and for that alone I wouldn’t piss on his grave. For his family, who knew him as something other than a boil on the ass of a shitbird maggot, I feel sorrow for, and offer my condolences. For the Haditha Marines he slandered, and for the veterans of the Long War he defamed, and for the honor of my Corps; may he roast in hell. Good riddance, may the world forget you ever claimed the title United States Marine.

Comments 26 Comments »                                              

Just read that Maddog Mutha Murtha has passed on. In the interest of trying (REALLY trying) to be civil….

Oh hell….another bastard bites the dust.   At this rate we’ll have Congress cleaned out by Christmas.

UPDATE [Emp. Misha] Beat me to it, Mrs M. And so an illustrious career in corruption, bribe-taking, treason and robbing the taxpayers blind comes to an end. A long overdue end, we might add.

We’d try to come up with something neutral to say, but after Haditha… Nope, just ain’t got it in us.

Roast in Pieces, you rotten, slanderous, treasonous, corrupt, skin-bag’s worth of feces. Karma’s a bitch, ain’t she?

We will acknowledge one undeniable achievement of yours, EX Marine.

There, acknowledged.

Now dump that sack of shit into an unmarked grave. The cadaver is already beginning to stink up the neighborhood.

Thatisall.

Comments 56 Comments »                                              

I know all of you peasants are currently getting ready for the SuperBowl and there’s nothing wrong with that. So am I.

But it’s Sunday, so for those who are thusly inclined, I offer the most beautiful, in my opinion, rendition of Schubert’s “Ave Maria”

We are all in the hands of G-d, and in these troubled times, turning to Him for comfort… It’ll all be alright.

YouTube Preview Image

Comments 24 Comments »                                              

This time, the one about the poor woman who died of cancer “because of lack of insurance” who wanted to be buried in her Ogabe T-Shirt. The woman that he couldn’t remember the name of as he pulled her out of her grave to use her as a prop in his own personal “Look How Awesome I Am” show.

Yep, that one was a lie too. (h/t DPUD).

Turns out she was insured. She just made the bad decision to use the money she would need to cover the deductible for investing in her own business instead. By the time she realized she was sick, the money was gone.

No, we are not going to dance upon this poor unfortunate woman’s grave because, as they say: There but for the Grace of G-d… Sure, with the benefit of 20/20 hindsight it’s all too easy to say “why didn’t you go to the doctor sooner?”, “why didn’t you keep enough money in savings to cover your deductible, just in case?” and yada yada yada. What if she wasn’t sick then? What if there was no lump back then? She was in her mid-thirties when that vile and yes, evil disease started growing in her. How many of us can state, truthfully, that we didn’t feel, at that age, that there was no need for us to worry about things such as cancer?

Truthfully, now.

His Imperial Majesty feels for this woman and her loved ones, and her untimely death adds to the list of reasons why we hate cancer more than any other disease known to mankind. It strikes randomly, and it strikes cowardly, many times without announcing its presence until it is too late. Too many good people have died way ahead of their time because of it.

But her death wasn’t the fault of “Big Evil Insurance”, it wasn’t the fault of “people being unable to get coverage” because she was insured.

And her death certainly wasn’t deserving of being used as a stage prop in King Narcissus’ “Love Me” Show.

He’s a disgusting liar, sociopath and malignant narcissist, and the sooner he is shuffled out of office the better.

Not only is he dangerous to our nation, he’s a bloody disgrace to our nation.

Thatisall.

Comments 31 Comments »                                              

But really, Almighty Father, we never expected you to crank it up to eleven. However, even though we are the Ruler of All the Universe and Outlying Counties, Defender of the Clue, Wielder of the ClueBat of Doom etc. etc., we are still supremely grateful to You for having blessed us so much in that respect.

You all remember the impeccably credited and widely respected climatologist railroad engineer Rajendra Pachauri who happens to be the head of the Useless Nitwits’ Ponzi Division, aka the IPCC, and you remember him because our very own Imperial Torturer has written ever so eloquently about him and his multi-million dollar grant scam based on some assclown’s decades old idle speculation and extrapolation about what might happen to the glaciers of the Himalayas (which are still very much there, we might add) has since, in true U.N. fashion, turned into “scientific concensus” with not a question asked. You may also know that the author of said idle speculation, one Syed Hasnain, since became hired by Rajendra “I’ve Been Working on the Railroad” Pachauri and paid by the funds that Mr. “Get the Trains to Run on Time” scammed off of a gullible public. If not, here’s a summary.

We’re sure it’s all pure coincidence.

Anyway, Dr. Railroad Pachauri, now that his scam has been exposed, has done us all the favor of refusing to resign in disgrace, and thank G-d for that. After all, his stubborn refusal to admit that the gig is up means that the utter disgrace of the IPCC will continue for many a news cycle.

But he’s doubling down on stupid on top of it (h/t Darth Bacron):

Rajendra Pachauri, the besieged head of the U.N.’s International Panel on Climate Change, told the Financial Times on Wednesday that he is the victim of a “carefully orchestrated” campaign to block climate change legislation.

“I would say [there are] nefarious designs behind people trying to attack me with lies, falsehoods,” he told the paper, swatting away allegations that his India-based climate institute, TERI, has benefited from decisions made by the IPCC, which he also chairs.

Which he is right to dispute. Unless you count sacks of gold dropped on your doorstep as a “benefit”, of course.

Climate change skeptics “are people who deny the link between smoking and cancer; they are people who say that asbestos is as good as talcum powder,” he said.

“I hope that they apply it (asbestos) to their faces every day.”

You stay classy, rail monkey. We’re sure that’s going to garner a lot of positive publicity for the U.N. agency that you’re heading. We have a suggestion as to what we’d like to rub your face in as well but, seeing as we’re but a lowly Emperor with an education in actual sciences rather than, say, a famous railroad engineer (and, as such, an expert climatologist as well!), we’re less subtle in our approach. We’d suggest the use of old-fashioned ground glass instead.

But enough snubs about your peasant education. Who can blame you? Your High Priest is a clown who flunked divinity school. Most likely because he kept referring to G-d as “that old geezer who’s sitting in my chair”, based on his particular delusions of adequacy.

We just want to thank you for your stubborn refusal to even attempt to repair the irreparably damaged reputation of the gaggle of bureaucrat boors that you head by simply stepping down. Keep it up.

We’re sure that if you stick to it long enough, the unwashed masses will eventually come around to your point of view. You are, after all, a member of the esteemed class of monkeys who keep the trains running on time.

Thatisall.

Comments 12 Comments »                                              

Via Powerline (h/t LC Intellectual Conservative)

Anyone who spends half his day talking will misspeak, inevitably; here, though, Obama mispronounces “corpsman” twice, obviously on purpose

We have to dispute the “on purpose” claim. It’s not on purpose, at least not in the “I meant to insult people” way. It’s just that King Narcissus really is that skull-meltingly, mind-bogglingly ignorant. The upside is that he has no inhibitions when it comes to putting his incandescent ignorance on display every time he opens his piehole. That’s some “great oratorical skills”, right there.

Really, King Obamandias, how fucking knuckle-draggingly stupid can you be? We’re asking this because, every time we think that you’ve finally plumbed the vast and pitch dark depths of your own lack of book learning, you manage to prove us wrong, yet again. And trust us, the bar we’ve so far set for your intellect is so low that we had to drill for several weeks to get it down there.

Can’t you get one miserable little thing right in the disastrous string of epic failures that we know as your public appearances? Would it be too unbearably much to ask of you to appear on the screen, just once, without burdening the Imperial Physique with debilitating bouts of paroxysmal laughter?

No, pronouncing “corpsman” as “corpse-man” is not an honest and common mistake, at least not to those of us who actually passed English 101. At this point, we’re doubting that you even attended. Look it up. “Corps” is, and will always be, pronounced “core.” It doesn’t matter if you append a “man” to it. Or do you also think that it’s called “The Army Corpse of Engineers?”

At this point, had you been somebody of at least average intelligence, we’d be advising you to keep your yap shut about things you have not the faintest comprehension of, lest you make yourself look quite the bumbling, functionally illiterate fool that you so verily are, but we also realize that putting that limitation upon yourself would preclude any utterances from you on any subject whatsoever, and if there is one thing that we have learned about you, it is that the moment your voice box stops producing odd, barely intelligent sounds is the very same moment that we’ll notice a cardboard tag tied to your big toe.

The only thing more painful than having to listen to an intellect as far below par as yours pontificating on subjects that you have no knowledge of whatsoever, and believe you us it is painful since we have a famously low tolerance for fools, is having to read even your critics starting their criticisms with words praising your oratorical skills since, for reasons unbeknownst to anybody with a functioning brain, it has become Conventional Wisdom that you’re a “great speaker.”

So far, we have seen absolutely zero evidence for that statement. If we were to grudgingly acknowledge any skill whatsoever in your oral flatulence, it’s that we’d agree that you’d make a fairly pleasant voice-over for auto insurance commercials. Or, for that matter, anything that has been written for you, requiring no skill from you other than the ability to read.

Today, we learned that said written material had better been written phonetically or you’ll find a way to mangle that menial, robotic task as well.

Thatisall.

Comments 51 Comments »                                              

There are those in the Empire who know Jim Treacher, who blogged as “Mother may I sleep with Treacher?”. A political satirist in the same vein as IOWAHAWK, his deft skewerings have discomfited our enemies many times.

Now he has a new [paying!] gig at The Daily Caller [http://dailycaller.com/] with a blog called THE DC TRAWLER. The Daily Caller itself is no flash in the pan. It is run by Tucker Carlson, who is about as conservative/libertarian as the networks will allow on the air [not very, but you take what you can get, even on FOX News where he had a show] and he was a regular “Sunday Talking Head”.

Now that you have the background, on to the meat of the event.

Jim Treacher was the victim of a hit and run by a black SUV last night in Washington. The vehicle was identified by witnesses and the DC police as belonging to the Secret Service. Later information indicates that it may have been another Federal security agency. Here is what he says:

Give us more, O Emperor! »

Comments 35 Comments »                                              

Well, it passed fairly unnoticed, its importance recognized only by those who were there, and those who have paid attention. On Saturday January 23 the United States Marine Corps turned over responsibility for operations in Al Anbar Province to the United States Army. The last Marine combat operation had been run on January 14th, and it was time for the last Marine infantry battalion still in Iraq, 3rd battalion 24th Marines, to leave. The Army’s 1st Armored Division assumed control for both Anbar and Baghdad provinces.

Anbar was once the heart of the Iraqi insurgency. Cities such as Ramadi and Fallujah were scenes of the fiercest fighting of the entire war, and some of the worst house to house fighting the Corps had faced since Hue in 1968. But after 5 years of hard fighting, of conventional slug fests, IED and VBIED bombings, and COIN warfare, the insurgency was crushed. Iraqis lined up under mortar and sniper fire to vote. Queue’s of volunteers for the fledgling Iraqi Army and National Police were shelled and car bombed. The survivors closed ranks and lined up again, defiantly daring the AQI to hit them again. Iraqis were trained, tested, and blooded; and now stand in place of the U.S. troops they admired and wanted to emulate.  And the whole time the Iraqis were struggling to stand on their own and begin building their own country, one free of Baathist tyranny, the U.S. military fought to provide them the environment they needed to be able to take their rightful place in the community of nations.

In the face of a ruthless enemy our military prevailed. While fifth columnists at home called the war evil, our warriors ignorant dupes, the cause unjust, the vicious butchers that were our enemy “freedom fighters”; while they did everything they could to ensure our defeat, our men prevailed. They efficiently and ruthless liquidated the enemy with one hand, while they caressed the children and innocents of Iraq with the other. They performed magnificently, and they won.

Much will be said over the next year about our “responsible draw down” from Iraq. They will say that the war has “ended”. Obama will claim credit for “bringing our troops home”. But few will dare to call it victory. Fewer still will admit that the troop withdrawals were agreed to in the Status of Forces Agreement in 2008. And even fewer that it was made possible by the tactical and strategic victories of 2003 – 2008.

No, they will not claim victory, but make no mistake that it is exactly that. We defeated Saddam Husseins Iraq. In it’s place we sowed the seeds of a western style democracy in the heart of the Islamic world, right next door to the evil theocracy of the Iranian Republic, the birthplace and spiritual heart of the modern Islamo-fascist movement. And we drew in thousands of Jihadi’s into a battlespace of our choosing, where our tactics, techniques, and equipment could perform at their peak efficiency. And we slaughtered them. In our way, not theirs.

The war that Harry Reid triumphantly claimed was lost, was instead won on the dusty roads of Anbar province. It was won in the parlors of tribal chiefs over chia and hookas. It was won in the hearts and minds of the Anbar Sunnis and the Baghdad and Diyala Shias. It was won by the very same men who are now leaving, coming home to a nation who will little notice their return.

In March of 2003 some of the very first Marines to cross the border into Iraq were the Scouts and CAAT teams of 4th Tank Battalion. The very same platoon, loaned out to 3/24 for the final deployment, was part of the  last combat operation on January 14th. In fact, some of the very same men were there for both. It was a long, hard fight in between. And they, WE, prevailed. No play of semantics can take away what they, and by extension what we as a nation, accomplished.

As of this morning those Marines, the men of Scout Platoon, 3/24, the last combat Marines in Iraq, are in Camp Pendleton California.

No one, no bastard here in the world, can ever take away what you and your predecessors did. I’m proud to call you, and the war fighters of all of our branches, my countrymen.

Welcome Home Marines, and congratulations on a job well done, well done indeed.

Semper Fidelis.

Comments 17 Comments »                                              

(Hat tip to Barth Dacron)

No, not THAT Big Dick.

It seems that another one tried to enter The World’s Largest Rectum™, but he was rejected by the sphincter.

In Saudi Arabia, size does count.

A high level Pakistani diplomat has been rejected as Ambassador of Saudi Arabia because his name, Akbar Zib, equates to “Biggest Dick” in Arabic. Saudi officials, apparently overwhelmed by the idea of the name, put their foot down and gave the idea of his being posted there, the kibosh.

Perhaps the first time in history that any Shoddy Retardian male has denied entry to a large penis into his sand-encrusted shithole.

F.E.T.E.

Comments 19 Comments »