Thank G-d For “Smarterer” Foreign Policy

…and that it arrived just in time to save us all from that horrid, amateur, jingoistic cowboy Boooosh and his many misadventures.

So now Putin’s guys have rolled into the Crimea (that’s the peninsula at the far south of the Ukraine, for those wondering) in an invas… sorry, an “uncontested arrival”, as King Barack Definitely-Not-Hussein Obama’s misadministration calls it. No, we’re not kidding you.

Whatever did we do before that genius Obama came along and wrapped the world around his little finger?

Another solid win in the Putin-Obama series.

For values of "win"

For values of “win”

And who doesn’t remember the brutal Syrian Smackdown?



…or the Arab Spring?

Yippe-kay-yay, racist h8ers!

Yippe-kay-yay, racist h8ers!

…the Libyan Liberation?

Nothing more liberating than... Ah fuckit.

Nothing more liberating than… Ah fuckit.

We’re in the best of hands, you racist teabaggers, THE BEST OF HANDS!

Countdown to when the Russian forces in Ukraine become “undocumented humanitarian aid columns” in 4…3…2…

Heckuva job, Barry, heckuva job!



  1. 1
    Eric Praline growls and barks:

    I’m so glad this smart diplomacy allows us to cut our military down to less than Depression era levels. Who needs armored divisions when you can just send Slow Joe to hash it out with the Ruskies? Top Men.

  2. 2
    Tallulah growls and barks:

    Last night I was reading (in Vol. II of The Last Lion) about the German invasion of the Rhineland in 1936. This was Hitler’s first incursion into forbidden territory, and he later said it was the most nerve-wracking 48 hours of his life — that if France or England had mobilized against his still-small army, they would have crushed him and that would have been It.

    The parallels between Putin’s move against Crimea/Ukraine and Hitler’s against the Rhineland are pretty fucking amazing.

    The Locarno Treaty of mutual guarantee provided that the German-Belgian and Franco-German frontiers as fixed by the Treaty of Versailles were inviolable; that Germany, Belgium, and France would never attack each other except in “legitimate defense” or in consequence of a League of Nations obligation; that they would settle their disputes by pacific means; and that in case of an alleged breach of these undertakings, the signatories would come to the defense of the party adjudged by the League to be the party attacked and also in case of a “flagrant violation.”

    Now? Ukraine is free by agreement of the great powers after the fall of the Communist dictatorship of the USSR. The Russians are supposed (as are all member nations, hah) to go to the UN and peacefully settle any disputes. AND America and Great Britain have given Ukraine assurances that they will come to the aid of Ukraine if the Russians invade.

    The treaties of guarantee between France and Poland or Czechoslovakia provided for mutual support against unprovoked attack. A further consequence of the pact was the evacuation of Allied troops from the Rhineland in 1930, five years ahead of schedule.

    The United States and the EU insisted that Ukraine give up their nukes — their strongest defense against Russian invasion — in exchange for guarantees of mutual support against unprovoked attack. They disarmed accordingly.

    The clear meaning of Locarno was that Germany renounced the use of force to change its western frontiers but agreed only to arbitration as regards its eastern frontiers, and that Great Britain promised to defend Belgium and France but not Poland and Czechoslovakia.

    Sound familiar?

    In March 1936 Germany sent troops into the Rhineland, which had been demilitarized by the Treaty of Versailles, declaring that the situation envisaged at Locarno had been changed by the Franco-Soviet alliance of 1935.

    France regarded the German move as a “flagrant violation” of Locarno, but Great Britain declined to do so, and no action was taken.

    Germany made no effort to arbitrate its dispute with invasion of Czechoslovakia in 1938 or Poland in 1939.

    The French sent an ambassador to London in 1936 to plead for them to honor their alliance, but PM Stanley Baldwin was resolutely isolationist and pro-German (they kept thinking that Herr Hitler was a good man, take him for all in all! and very good against the Bolshies). And the French chickened out, when, as all discovered after the fact, Hitler could have EASILY been smacked down had either country had the balls to do it.

    Alas, the opportunity was lost. But this is so similar to Crimea: Hitler, in invading the Rhineland, was taking over former German territory, inhabited by Germans. Putin is using that excuse to invade the majority-Russian Crimea. Hitler counted on the guarantors of the Rhineland to be weak and vacillating; Putin is making the same calculation. The Rhineland had been demilitarized by treaty; Ukraine was disarmed by treaty.

    Putin also still rules that big chunk of Georgia that he invaded and tore off. No one did a damn thing about that, either. Like Hitler, he’s scanning the landscape for targets of opportunity.

  3. 3
    Eric Praline growls and barks:

    Remember back in 08 how leftists had such a chummy laugh over what a stupid bint Sarah Palin was for saying Obama’s weak response to Putin’s invasion of Georgia would encourage him to invade the Ukraine? Yeah, we really dodged a bullet with that one.

  4. 4
    lc purple raider growls and barks:

    Actually, Obama probably told Putin to go ahead and invade Ukraine.

    You know, dictator to dictator.

  5. 5

    president Uhhhhhhbama is our Neville Chamberlain. His weak and nutless responses to Syria, Egypt, Ukraine, Benghazi, and who knows what more in the near future, makes him an even weaker ineffective president than Carter. Putin knows that and has nothing to fear from us.

  6. 6
    VonZorch Imperial Researcher growls and barks:

    As the Chinese say, we are living in interesting times.

  7. 7
    Lady H growls and barks:

    Maybe they can have a beer conference (or whatever it’s called?)

    Does Vladimir play golf?