No, We Really Don’t Give a Shit. Sorry.

Somebody writing for something called The Nation which is allegedly something that people read is getting all pearl-clutchy because the right wing hatey haters of the cisgender heteronormative patriarchal oppressive hegemony or whatever the fuck they call the 99.9999% of males who like their vice NOT versa these days and who feel quite oppressively comfortable with their oppressive, possibly fascist penises aren’t erupting in a synchronized orgasm of coordinated 5 minute hate the way that “progressives” always do when Journolist v.2 (now with even less independent thought) sends out their “who to hate, what to think and what to say today” memos.

Apparently somebody who plays in the NFL of whom we’ve never ever even heard and about whom we care even less has “bravely” joined the ranks of approximately every single wannabe want-to-be-somebody American who realized that talent alone wouldn’t do it and so proclaimed that they liked their sex cis as opposed to trans. Hey, you gotta work with what you’ve got, and if what you’ve got isn’t all that much to begin with, you might as well go all Lady GaGa on the Outrage Circuit.

Any sort of attention is better than no attention at all, no?

The problem is that it got sort of old about twenty years ago when the select tiny group of brave individuals bravely outing themselves started numbering in the tens of millions.

But what really outrages, frustrates and baffles that unknown writer for an unknown web zine called, what was it again, The Nation?, is that the VRWC has failed to respond in the way that his Zampolits at the Daily Kotz and the entirety of the so-called “media” have taught him since he first learned to suck a Marx-shaped nipple for sustenance.

Here’s a hint, you daft groupthinking drone: We don’t give a shit which way whozit of the NFL or anybody else wants his sexing. It doesn’t affect us. It’s none of our business. Oh, we may have personal opinions as to the desirability of his preferences, much like we have our personal opinions about white after labor day, how much habanero to put in a chili and just many ounces a reasonable steak should be.

No, we don’t give a shit. Not even a smidgen of a shit.

As with race, the only reason that we are still even bothering with inane, childish bullshit like that is that you “progressives” just won’t shut up about it. You just can’t go through a single day without babbling endlessly about irrelevant shit like that, because if you don’t keep it in the public consciousness, then you might have to start contributing to mankind in a useful manner in order to stay relevant.

And you can’t do THAT, now can you? That’s why you became “progressives” in the first place. At least you have enough self-awareness to know, when you’re all alone, that you’re as worthless as screen doors on a submarine.

You pretend to be honestly interested in the “Right’s” opinion on who the fuck is it anyway from the NFL and his proclamation that he likes boys more than girls, but what REALLY frustrates you is that we haven’t reacted at all, the way your “progressive” comrade masters have told you we would.

And in our non-reaction lies the answer to your question, if you truly wanted an answer to it:


Next question, you slobbering snotbrain.


UPDATE: OK, we take it back. We do care. Sometimes. We just learned that Ellen Page is gay too. Damn. Just… Damn…

But it’s still probably not the H8y McH8 response that you dimwit progressive twats were looking for. We can assure you that we don’t hate Ellen Page. Quite the opposite, in fact.


  1. 1
    angrywebmaster growls and barks:

    I think the short version is.

    “So your homosexual? Big deal. Shut up and play football!”

  2. 2
    LC R6 growls and barks:

    That person’s article (hate to use gender pronouns as I’m not sure what it wants itself referred to as) is just another shining example of the left’s motto:

    E Unum Pluribus

  3. 3
    LC Light29ID - The Imperial Asshole growls and barks:

    just many ounces a reasonable steak should be.

    That would be anything over 48oz…

  4. 4
    LC_Salgak growls and barks:

    There are only a few questions to ask ?

    1. Is he any good ?

    No more questions. Although I could ask which position he prefers, Tight End, or Wide Reciever. . . . :em05:

  5. 5
    single stack growls and barks:

    I had never heard of Ellen Page so I looked her up.

    Damn. Just…Damn…

  6. 6
    LC SecondMouse growls and barks:

    This is one of the ways that political correctness destroys the truth. The truth is that no one gives a rats ass whether some NFL player has decided to announce that he is a pole-smoker, or that Ellen Page wants us to know that she is a carpet-muncher.

    The truth is that the progressives are destroying our country, but no one is getting this news because the media has decided that lurid stories about people who are members of the statists’ protected classes breaking the imaginary bonds of their mythical oppression are more important. Cue the 340-pound man in the gold lamé dress.

    So who cares if we will be huddled with our grandchildren around a burning pile of our furniture for warmth as long as the LGBT platoon feels comfortable swapping body fluids whenever and wherever they please, with a DHS escort.

  7. 7
    Eric Praline growls and barks:

    LC SecondMouse says:

    The truth is that no one gives a rats ass whether some NFL player has decided to announce that he is a pole-smoker, or that Ellen Page wants us to know that she is a carpet-muncher.

    I don’t really care that Ellen Page enjoys fish tacos now… but I’ll be giving it serious thought later on in my bunk. :em05:

  8. 8
    LC R6 growls and barks:

    Well, all of this outy outing coming out stuff has finally given me the courage and resolve to announce right here on the Rott:

    I’m a lesbian.

  9. 9
    Special Ed growls and barks:

    I hereby resolve to address people by how they Identify Themselves. I’m all about going along to get along.
    “Hi, pleased to meet you. I understand you’re Ellen Page, the lesbian.”
    “Hello, Mr. President. I read in your books that you’re originally from Kenya. How does that work?”
    “So honored to meet you, Mr. and Ms. Secretary! Now, which one of you lied about being in Cambodia, and which one lied about being under fire on the tarmac? Whatever happened o that little girl with the flowers? Did the snipers get her? Oh, my wife wanted me to ask: How do you cook rice after it’s removed from your ass?”
    “Mr. Clinton! Wow! How many bimbos have you not had sex with today?”

    I feel really good about it. Maybe it’s because I’m Special


  10. 10
    BITOA growls and barks:

    They get quite hysterical when not getting attention. They might pull your hair.

  11. 11
    Darth Venomous growls and barks:

    There are only a few questions to ask ?

    1. Is he any good ?

    Doesn’t appear likely, if his performance at the combine is any indication.

  12. 12
    Emperor Misha I growls and barks:

    Darth Venomous says:

    Doesn’t appear likely, if his performance at the combine is any indication.

    Doesn’t matter now. I mean, now that he’s “bravely” joined the three gazillion other “brave” people who have “bravely braved” the horrors of being all alone among three gazillion persecuted poor babies.

    Any failure to sign him from now on will be purely due to racist cisgendered heteronormative fascist nazi Koch-brotherism.

    What? Anybody thought he “came out” for any OTHER reason?

    :em05: :em05: :em05: :em05: :em05: :em05: :em05: :em05: