Deej Started It

Well, sort of. My contribution to the weekend frivolity.

A man is driving down the road and his car breaks down near a monastery.

He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, “My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?”

The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, and even fix his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound. A sound unlike anything he’s ever heard before. The Sirens that nearly seduced Odysseus into crashing his ship comes to his mind. He doesn’t sleep that night. He tosses and turns trying to figure out what could possibly be making such a seductive sound.

The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, “We can’t tell you. You’re not a monk.” Distraught, the man is forced to leave.

Years later, tortured after never being able to forget that sound, the man goes back to the monastery and pleads for the answer again.

The monks reply, “We can’t tell you. You’re not a monk.”

The man says, “If the only way I can find out what is making that beautiful sound is to become a monk, then please, make me a monk.”

The monks reply, “You must travel the earth and tell us how many blades of grass there are and the exact number of grains of sand. When you find these answers, you will have become a monk.”

The man sets about his task.

After many years of searching he returns as a gray-haired old man and knocks on the door of the monastery. A monk answers. He is taken before a gathering of all the monks.

“In my quest to find what makes that beautiful sound, I travelled the earth and have found what you asked for: By design, the world is in a state of perpetual change. Only God knows what you ask. All a man can know is himself, and only then if he is honest and reflective and willing to strip away self deception.”

The monks reply, “Congratulations. You have become a monk. We shall now show you the way to the mystery of the sacred sound.”

The monks lead the man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, “The sound is beyond that door.”

The monks give him the key, and he opens the door. Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone. The man is given the key to the stone door and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby. And so it went that he needed keys to open doors of emerald, pearl and diamond.

Finally, they come to a door made of solid gold. The sound has become very clear and definite. The monks say, “This is the last key to the last door.”

The man is apprehensive to no end. His life’s wish is behind that door!

With trembling hands, he unlocks the door, turns the knob, and slowly pushes the door open. Falling to his knees, he is utterly amazed to discover the source of that haunting and seductive sound…

 

But, of course, I can’t tell you what it is because you’re not a monk.

 

22 comments

  1. 1
    Orion growls and barks:

    I really hate you right now, Crunchy…

    Grains of sand, huh…Well, how long can that really take? Be right back…

    Orion

  2. 2

    Orion says:

    I really hate you right now, Crunchy…

    That’s what I’m here for. :em01:
    LC 0311 Sir Crunchie I.M.H., K.o.E. recently posted..Deej Started ItMy Profile

  3. 3
    LC R6 growls and barks:

    Sounds like liberal logic.

  4. 4
    LC Guy S growls and barks:

    I, on the other hand, because my hearing is not as acute as it was in my younger days…thus the seductive sound would be not as clear to me…will join the local order of brothers just across the Wisconsin border from us. They harvest, gather, cut, fry, and package potatoes.

    Yep….gonna be a chip-monk!

  5. 5
    Orion growls and barks:

    LC Guy S @ #:
    That’s it, Guy S. You’re on the list.

    Orion

  6. 6
    LC Guy S growls and barks:

    Take a number Orion….most, if not all the alphabet agencies probably have me on their’s already! *grin*

  7. 7
    single stack growls and barks:

    Fucker

  8. 8
  9. 9
    LC Xystus growls and barks:

    But, of course, I can’t tell you what it is because you’re not a monk.

    Another, more important reason: You don’t have the answer because, as everyone here knows, you’re not one either! :em05:

  10. 10

    LC Xystus says:

    Another, more important reason: You don’t have the answer because, as everyone here knows, you’re not one either!

    :em05:
    All I can say in reply is to quote Single Stack
    single stack says:

    Fucker

    LC 0311 Sir Crunchie I.M.H., K.o.E. recently posted..Deej Continues…My Profile

  11. 11

    LC Guy S says:

    Yep….gonna be a chip-monk!

    :em05: :em01:
    LC 0311 Sir Crunchie I.M.H., K.o.E. recently posted..Deej Continues…My Profile

  12. 12
    LCBrendan growls and barks:

    An outlaw rides into a small town, pausing to see the saloon and smiling. It’s been a long ride from Abilene, a whiskey and meal looked good. His horse is brand new, a large roan stallion with a blaze on its forehead. He trots up to the saloon hitching pole and ties the horse up, wishing for a bath as well…after a meal, he smiles to himself.

    He walks into the bar, and all talk ceases as the townsfolk sizes him up. Dusty, a hardened, weather worn face, and a low slung pair of revolvers on his hips, the grips well worn after years of use. He walks into the bar, nodding to the barkeep…no need to start trouble here, all he wants is a drink and a meal and a nights rest. Outlaw he may be, but right now he didnt care.

    He sits down on a stool, snapping his fingers. “Whisky, barkeep, make it fast”. In a few seconds, a bottle and shot glass are in front of him, and he drinks the shot quickly, feeling the heat of the alcohol blast his belly…it’s been a long hard ride.

    “Whats on the menu?” he asks, raising an eyebrow.

    The barkeep looks at him nervously, and the outlaw’s face softens a little. “I aint looking for trouble, son..just something to eat”

    “We have pecan pie and some hot beef” the young man says. The lone gunman nods “That’ll do..I’ll eat over at the table”

    He gets up and walks toward a table wherte two men are drinking, seeing him, they scatter, knocking their chairs over. The outlaw sits down, taking the bottle with him. A few minutes later, he is served, and he eats quickly. Cant wait too long or the sheriff will be here.

    His meal finished, he burps loudly, walks over and tosses a dollar bill onto the bar “Keep the change”.

    He walks outside, and stops dead…his horse is gone. Hitching at his belt, he pushes back into ther bar, glaring at the crowd. He glares at each and every one of them, and in a loud voice, declares

    “If mah horse isnt back where it was in three minutes, I’m goin’ to do what I did in Abilene. And I tell ya, folks, I didnt like what I had to do in Abilene…y’hear me?”.

    There is dead silence, broken only by the sounds of feet scurrying down the street, a raised voice, and the clatter of hooves. he walks outside again, to find his horse safely tied up and waiting for him. He walks back inside “Folks, thank ye, and I’m mighty glad I didnt have to do what I did in Abilene. Y’all is good people, and when I’m gone, tell ‘em Texas Jim wuz here” he turns to the barkeep “Good pie and beef, barkeep, I’m much obliged to ya”.

    He goes outside, checks the saddle and the hidden compartment in his saddlebags..feels the rustle of his stash of money, and nods. As he gets ready to mount, two young urchins come running up to him.

    “Hey mister hey mister, are you REALLY Texas Jim?” He nods “That I am…sonny. If you see the sheriff, tell him I didnt start no trouble”. The smaller of the two pulls at his sleeve “Hey mister, what did you have to do in Abilene? Did ya have to shoot anyone? Did ya have to use your gun?” The outlaw smiles “Now thats not a thing to ask a stranger, kid” but the urchin is insistent.

    “Mister, what DID you have to in Abilene?”

    Texas Jim kneels down and looks dead into the kid’s eyes. “You really want to know what i did in Abilene?” ther two children nod up and down.

    “What did I do in Abilene?” he says, and suddenly looks very very tired.
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    “I had to walk home”

  13. 13

    LCBrendan @ #:
    :em05:
    LC 0311 Sir Crunchie I.M.H., K.o.E. recently posted..Deej Continues…My Profile

  14. 14
    irish19 growls and barks:

    But, of course, I can’t tell you what it is because you’re not a monk.

    :em08: :em08: :em08:

  15. 15

    :em05: :em03:
    LC cmblake6, Imperial Black Ops Technician recently posted..28 years ago todayMy Profile

  16. 16
  17. 17

    BC, Imperial Torturer @ # 16: Thank you SO much. What has been seen cannot be unseen. :em07:
    LC cmblake6, Imperial Black Ops Technician recently posted..28 years ago todayMy Profile

  18. 18

    I know what the sound is,,, it’s that scream the drag on your fishing reel makes when you’ve set the hook n’ the game is ON!

  19. 19
    LC Spare Parts growls and barks:

    May you be condemned to listen to the Gargoyle joke every day when you depart this life.

  20. 20

    LC cmblake6, Imperial Black Ops Technician says:

    What has been seen cannot be unseen.

    Or heard unheard.
    LC 0311 Sir Crunchie I.M.H., K.o.E. recently posted..Deej Continues…My Profile

  21. 21

    LC Spare Parts says:

    he Gargoyle joke

    Never heard of it. care to share? This is the appropriate venue after all.
    LC 0311 Sir Crunchie I.M.H., K.o.E. recently posted..Deej Continues…My Profile

  22. 22
    Baja Scorpion Jeff growls and barks:

    :em08: :em08: