Noble LC’as and gentle G.L.O.R’s, it is my distinguished and unabashed honour to present to you our new Prime Minister, Mr Tony Abbott.
Rhodes scholar, firefighter, qualified lifesaver and now an elected Prime Minister after an election that saw Labor’s vote reduced to its lowest in close to 100 years.
The bizarro factor in ths election has to be seen to be believed. Put any liquid refreshment aside before reading on.
For reasons unknown to God, Man and the local drover’s dog, the Greens, those watermelon neo Luddites and climate scaremongers, handed their vote preferences to Clive Palmer.
A MINING MAGNATE
They handed their votes to a guy that runs mining companies
I know. I know. You and me both.
Clive Palmer owns Mineralogy, Waratah Coal, Queensland Nickel at Townsville, Palmer Coolum Resort on the Sunshine Coast, Palmer Sea Reef Golf Course at Port Douglas, Palmer Colonial Golf Course at Robina, and the Palmer Gold Coast Golf Course, also at Robina. He owned Gold Coast United FC from 2008 to 2012.
Speaking of bizarre: here’s Rudd’s “concession speech”..in which he uses a phrase coined by John Howard (a former Prime Minister), Ben Chifley, (another former PM) and for reasons that to this day will mystify any and all, he used the title of SCOAMF’s “book” “Audacity of Hope”.
Surreal, strange,weird…and it should also be noted that not once in his 22 minute speech (during which my wife uttered the same comment Mr Abbott did in one of the debates “Doesnt this guy EVER shut up?”) did he mention Julia Gillard, the previous PM he replaced after promising never to contest the leadership again.
He was PM this time for 72 days.
I had no time for Jilia Gillard, I didnt like her and never trusted her..but I would also be remiss if I did not also say that she has acted graciously since she was removed. Whatever my political differences with her may be, her dignity and grace will always be to her credit.
I BID YOU STAND AND RAISE A GLASS TO THE PEOPLE OF AUSTRALIA
I am happy to announce that responsible, intelligent and highly capable leadership has been restored to our nation.