Okay folks who’s got the popcorn

Our election is on Saturday.

All arrows point to a conservative victory, and the Ruddster, who was Prime MInister, then wasnt when they threw him out ,because they put Julia Gillard in , because Julia was better than Kevin, may be thrown out again.

By us this time.

With me so far?

Then Kevin’s mates, who threw him out before, decided to throw Julia Gillard out, as she was worse than Kevin, only then they brought Kevin Rudd back in, after they threw him out for not being good enough the first time round, but he didnt want to be thrown out, so he tried to throw her out, (and now she has been thrown out), but now he is good enough to be Prime Minister and they havent thrown him out yet but they may do that later, after the voters throw them all out….

…are you following me?

Before you ask, no, they arent bringing Julia back, because they threw her out a while ago to bring in Kevin, (then as you remember they put her in as his deputy and she became Prime Minister after they threw Kevin out, then threw her out again to put Kevin back in, and now she threw herself out of politics…) and now we are having an election to throw Kevin out as Prime Minister after he was put back in to throw Jula Gillard out..and after the voters throw him out, out his party may throw him out too…

You see, the Labor Party may throw him out again, only this time it wont be to bring Julia back in (did I tell you Julia isnt in politics now? Yes? Goodie.) and he will be replaced we hope by Tony Abbott, who was once thrown out as Liberal leader (and Liberal here isnt liberal where you are, we dont like socialists so we use a big L in Liberal as opposed to small l liberals like you have in the US) and then they held a party room election , and the leader of the party at that time, Malcolm Turnbull, was thrown out by the same people that want to throw Kevin out, and get us to throw Kevin out after they threw Julia out after they brought Kevin back in…

Hang on I’m almost finished…

..and no one wants to throw Tony Abbott out because he will be the new Prime Minister who got voters to throw Kevin out after the same guys that threw him out the first time decided they liked Julia better….Malcolm doesnt want to throw Tony Abbott out, which is good, because if he tried to do that, Tony Abbotts party will throw HIM out…


Theres an election on Saturday.

In Australia.

I get to vote. To throw Kevin out.

Who’s got the popcorn?

EDIT: Owing to popular demand, and in recognition of the Rottie’s need to maintain some semblance of sanity whilst reading this, beer is on the table as you come in. Stronger stuff to the side.


  1. 1
    Cortillaen growls and barks:

    You lost me around “Our election”. Then again, I spent all day trying to build unioned SQL queries that will function properly from behind a ridiculously restrictive front-end that commits suicide anytime it sees a union. Most of that was finding out just how stupid the front-end is (hint: I ran out of facepalm after the second hour) and writing my own front(er?)-end to the front-end so it doesn’t require editing twelve points in the query by hand every time it is used. Whoever wrote the front-end should be shot for doing such a shoddy job (“good enough for government work” indeed); I ended up having to bypass the few useful features with what appears to be a debugging tool just suppress the nonsensical errors the front-end throws up on any vaguely complex (read: useful) queries, errors that, oddly enough, do not have anything to do with whether the query is valid. Oh, and this was in between bouts of my actual job. Tomorrow I get to try to teach folks who are… somewhat less than computer-savvy how to use the whole jerry-rigged abomination.
    /OT rant

    Oh, right, the point: As hellishly confusing and unnecessarily complicated as my work today was, your political situation is worse. I’m going to bed now. :em08:

  2. 2
    Bones growls and barks:

    Listen Bo, if you wnat me to ever try to follow along with your politics while you are explaining it, you will have to provide the beer (lots of it)!. Never again without alcohol. EVER!

  3. 3
    LCBrendan growls and barks:

    Look at it this way.

    All you have to do is read about it.

    I LIVE HERE :em06:

  4. 4
    Orion growls and barks:

    Wow. I wish MY country got to have elections. Well, elections where votes actually mean something. We used to, but not any more.


  5. 5
    Igor, Imperial Booby growls and barks:

    This is almost as freakin’ convoluted as the Middle East!! Y’all been taking lessons??


  6. 6
    LC Light29ID - The Imperial Asshole growls and barks:

    And I thought our system was screwed six days from Sunday and twice on the Sabbath. You guys need a fucking program to keep track…

  7. 7
    Terrapod growls and barks:


    Look at the bright side mate! You get to throw out your political idiots at just about any time for no reason or maybe for just reason while we here are stuck with Obungles the Red (line) for another 3+ years with ZERO chance of early removal so long as the ProgNaziLibtard scum control the senate.

    And yes, we have midterm elections in 2014 but I have very little faith enough independent minded people remain within the borders of this nation to sweep out sufficient commies to change the continuing march of Obungles the Red to further destroy this nation. And the Republicans are pretty much of the same ilk now.

    All the beer on the planet will not wash out from my soul what this asshole has done. Him and his cadre of progressive Nazis and their mindless union followers have chipped away at the foundations of this nation for 70 years and no one has stood up to them in any serious manner.

    The bell tolls but no one listens any more, pop culture, dumbing down of the electorate and fine tuned emotional control by the media have just about won the war.

    I hope Oz takes a hard right, gets back to basic self reliance and reduction of government intrusion, cleaning house and kicking out non assimilables and leftards in general, something we need to do here in a big way. Venezuela is coming here, no need to leave your home town!

  8. 8
    VonZorch Imperial Researcher growls and barks:

    Brendan, you spent at least six hours watching Abbott and Costello routines before writing that didn’t you? :em05:
    Cortillaen @ #:1
    Gah SQL, :em08: the only thing worse is machine code programming. :em06:

  9. 9
    LC Xystus growls and barks:

    Those who have been sacked would like to announce that the persons who just sacked them have just been sacked–oh, bloody ‘ell…


    The bell tolls but no one listens any more, pop culture, dumbing down of the electorate and fine tuned emotional control by the media have just about won the war.

    It ain’t over till all of us fall in battle–& maybe it won’t be over then.

    Australia may well have a role to play, though I’ve got no info on that.

  10. 10
    LCBrendan growls and barks:

    Australia may well have a role to play, though I’ve got no info on that.

    I could try and explain it for you…. :em05:

  11. 11
    Rain growls and barks:

    The hell with the popcorn, pass me the Excedrin. Trying to follow that gave me a headache. And I thought trying to figure out the logic of the idjits in charge where I work was painful. (hint: figure out the best, easiest most cost effective way to do something, then do the exact opposite)

  12. 12
    Emperor Misha I growls and barks:

    Oi mate, me ‘ead is ‘urting now, and I actually know how parliamentary systems work!

    I’ll take some of the strong stuff on the side, thanks.

  13. 13
    Slightly to the right of Gingis Khan growls and barks:

    Brendan…….. Thanks Mate. I needed that laugh!

  14. 14
    Igor, Imperial Booby growls and barks:

    VonZorch Imperial Researcher @ #8:

    the only thing worse is machine code programming

    Wuss. REAL programmers use machine code!

    I actually HAD to start with machine code, and work my way to IBM assembler – there wasn’t ANYthing else. Yes, I used drum, diode patch panel, sequencers, relay and stepper-relay logic, whatever I could get my hands on – Mom and Dad weren’t made of money, and while we weren’t broke we were not able to get (buy) ANYthing technological. Which is how I learned to fix *color* TV’s in Junior HS! It’s truly amazing what could be scrounged if you knew the right people and were willing to take an assembly (read: mainframe cpu) out of a bank, etc. IN PIECES and put it back together again when you were safely ensconced in your Mad Scientist Lair. Okay, Mom and Dad’s basement. But I lived there. Okay?

    Hell, I would’ve been able to TEACH machine code in HS, it was all I knew until I was in HS in ’67-68 and got introduced to IBM 1130’s, 1620’s, and then 360’s.
    Frankly I *still* enjoy eschewing compilers and coding things “by hand”, they put a lot of useless crap into the compiled program that I can’t/don’t use and I love fast, elegant code that runs in minimum PROM/RAM. So I’m a fossil, okay?

    So, Brendan, Good On Ya, mate! Keep up the confusing work and vote the scoundrels out – or, the LEAST scoundrel y’all can dredge up out of the Bay…

  15. 15
    Special Ed growls and barks:

    Ah, Igor, I’ve yet to use a word processor that functions half as well as the one that ran on our ten megabyte drives …

    Those who have been sacked would like to announce that the persons who just sacked them have just been sacked–oh, bloody ‘ell…

    Those responsible for sacking the people who have just been sacked, have been sacked.