It’s Really All About Choosing the Right Tool For the Job

Which, of course, we all know. Which is why you don’t bring screen door netting if you’re sent out to fix an exterior hatch on a submarine.

Or, you know, attempt an armed robbery with a bat.

Did we mention that the store this particular goblin tried to rob was a gun store? (H/t Sipsey Street Irregulars).

22-year-old Derrick Mosley reportedly attempted to rob Discount Gun Sales in Beaverton, Ore., on Thursday. Wielding a baseball bat, Mosley strolled into the store and smashed a display case.

Mosley, by the way, looks a lot like King Hussein’s son. If he’d had one.

Needless to say, not even the truly Cosmic Levels of Stupid exhibited by Mosley could turn this into a win for him.

All the store manager… of a gun store… had to do was pull out his own personal firearm. And that he did. Pointing it straight at Mosley, the manager successfully ordered the would-be robber to drop the bat, the unloaded gun he was trying to steal, and a nine-inch knife in his possession.

Upon arrival, the sheriff’s department reportedly found Mosley on the floor, still being held at gunpoint by the furious manager. The failed robber was booked on charges of first-degree robbery, first-degree theft, unlawful possession of a firearm, and second-degree criminal mischief.

…not to mention First Degree Felony Stupid.

Of course, now some raving hoplophobe somewhere will immediately scream: “See? Somebody DID try to rob a gun store, you gun-loving, crazy wingnutz.”

Yes.

Keyword here is tried.

Thatisall.

17 comments

  1. 1
    angrywebmaster growls and barks:

    I always wondered if anyone would be that dumb, or could be that dumb outside of the Democrat National Convention. I guess the answer is yes.

    Speaking of which, bought a couple of boxes of .223 today, topping off my supplies and I’m taking my Brother Inlaw to the range tomorrow. He’s never held a gun before and wants to see about getting into shooting. Me, I have a new red dot sight I need to zero as well as practice my anti-Trayvon defenses. (Or anti-Cervini defenses). CCW is next on the agenda.
    :em01:

    I will teach my BiL the three laws.

    1) ALWAYS assume a gun is loaded
    2) ALWAYS point it in a safe direction
    3) ALWAYS keep your finger OFF the trigger until ready to fire

    4) (Extra credit) NEVER point a gun at ANYTHING you don’t want to destroy.

    I will notify the range master of his noobieness before I even unpack my guns.
    :em06:
    angrywebmaster recently posted..The Peoples Republic of California Decrees…My Profile

  2. 2
    LC Darth Scoundrel growls and barks:

    Very rarely do you ever see such a textbook example of “target selection FAIL”

    The four rules according to Col. Cooper:
    1. All guns are always loaded
    2. Never point the gun at anything you do not want to kill
    3. Keep your cotton-pickin’ boogerhook off the bang switch until you are ready to fire (mighta paraphrased that one a bit)
    4. Be sure of your target and your backstop

    Violation of any 2 can and often will lead to a Very Bad Day.

    I managed to score some .22LR yesterday. Only 50 rounds and it came out to about 14 cents per round, but at least they had it.

    Who’da thunk it that we’d ever be jonesing for .22LR ferfucksakes?
    LC Darth Scoundrel recently posted..SoMy Profile

  3. 3
    angrywebmaster growls and barks:

    What we have here is saying the same thing differently. (I was using the phrasing my NRA instructor used) As to your #4, on an outdoor range that is also on the list. This is an indoor commercial range. Whatever is behind the target is whatever the range uses to keep projectiles from exiting the premises in an unauthorized manner.

    The last time I was outdoors, it was a sandpit. My brother was lining up a shot and I was safely behind him. I heard a motor and took off my ear protection, (as well as stepping back further), to try and locate the source of the sound. I did and promptly went to my brother, who had just finished loading and told him to hold fire. (Which he did)

    It was a bunch of people on quads on the coming up the hill on the other side. My brother couldn’t hear them, and they couldn’t see or hear us. We waited until they were clear of the area.

    And I always introduce myself to the range officer and I always ask questions and make sure we are on the same page before the firearms leave the cases

    We are fully agreed that safety comes first, second and 2 millionth. It is a mindset that needs no words.

    The range I go to is very good with inexperienced people. The last time I was there, there was a Chinese mother, and two others. (One male, one Female) I don’t know if it was brother/sister, boyfriend/girlfriend or mother inlaw with son/daughter inlaw. They were speaking Chinese and had rented some submachine guns.

    Mom used that Uzi like a pro. You do not want to dishonor her family.
    :em06:
    When I left, the young lady was firing away with a sterling and after each burst, giggled like a school girl. They were either visiting the US or were recent immigrants.

    The range officer was hovering over them and offering instructions.
    :em01:
    angrywebmaster recently posted..The Duchess of Cambridge has a boyMy Profile

  4. 4
    Special Ed growls and barks:

    Spats, Tejas and the entire South are seeing a deficit of ammo, as I understand it. Fear not, brother, it is entirely due to overwhelming demand, as even we in the sparsely populated but well-heeled Northwest face similar adversity. I recently checked a plastic bag inexplicably nestled amongst my ammo cans and discovered two presciently purchased bricks of .22LR, the likes of which I have not seen for lo, these many moons.

    WHOO-HOOO!!*

    *How pathetic is it that I celebrate 1100 rds of .22? I used to buy them at a penny per round.

  5. 5
    Special Ed growls and barks:

    Oops, my bag! I was thinking I was responding to Darth Venomous. AKA King Spatula I, King and Tyrant to us old farts.

    Apologies and racist! I must be racist somehow!! Sob!!

  6. 6
    FrankOK growls and barks:

    LC Darth Scoundrel says:

    Very rarely do you ever see such a textbook example of “target selection FAIL”
    The four rules according to Col. Cooper:
    1. All guns are always loaded
    2. Never point the gun at anything you do not want to kill
    3. Keep your cotton-pickin’ boogerhook off the bang switch until you are ready to fire (mighta paraphrased that one a bit)
    4. Be sure of your target and your backstop
    Violation of any 2 can and often will lead to a Very Bad Day.
    I managed to score some .22LR yesterday. Only 50 rounds and it came out to about 14 cents per round, but at least they had it.
    Who’da thunk it that we’d ever be jonesing for .22LR ferfucksakes?

    LC Darth Scoundrel recently posted..So

    I make it a point to use that very phrase whenever I work with anyone new to defensive weaponry.

    Why? Because people remember it!!

  7. 7
    Darth Venomous growls and barks:

    Oops, my bag! I was thinking I was responding to Darth Venomous. AKA King Spatula I, King and Tyrant to us old farts.

    (chuckle) :em01:

  8. 8
    Special Ed growls and barks:

    Es tut mir leid! Sorry ’bout that!

    I (just above) posted something to the effect of “My Fault!” or “My bag!”. My physical security site was responsible for this phrase: “My bag!”. Specifically, I believe (I have no proof, alas, but it fits his profile) Specialist Beverage (“Beaker” to us Site Denizens) was the first one to use the term ‘My Bag’ (in reference to a “sandbag”, inadvertently acquired during a ‘Spades’ game.). As such, it originated on Nato Site #104 circa 1998-1999, perhaps earlier.

    “My Bad”? WTF is that? What the f*** does that even mean? Thanks Beaker. And remember Jim Lawler!

  9. 9
    MikeG growls and barks:

    Charged with “unlawful possession of a firearm” That wasn’t even his, he was trying to steal it. Technically he WAS in possession of it. Prosecutor is throwing that one in for fun, isn’t he?

    Sweet.

  10. 10

    Holy Weapons Grade Stoopid, Batman! This douchetard is better off dead, lest he harm himself while brushing his teeth one day!
    LC Nicki the Resident Misanthropic Bitch recently posted..This is Where I get Politically IncorrectMy Profile

  11. 11
    VonZorch Imperial Researcher growls and barks:

    I’ve been to that store, the name is a lie, one of the highest cost places around.

  12. 12
    Igor, Imperial Booby growls and barks:

    VonZorch Imperial Researcher @ #11:
    Yep, when I was living there (in Portland) I also thought the store’s name was a misnomer…

  13. 13

    MikeG says:

    Charged with “unlawful possession of a firearm” That wasn’t even his, he was trying to steal it. Technically he WAS in possession of it. Prosecutor is throwing that one in for fun, isn’t he?

    Sweet.

    Yep, terminal grade stupid.

    …not to mention First Degree Felony Stupid.

    Better than mine.

    LC Nicki the Resident Misanthropic Bitch says:

    Holy Weapons Grade Stoopid, Batman! This douchetard is better off dead, lest he harm himself while brushing his teeth one day!
    LC Nicki the Resident Misanthropic Bitch recently posted..This is Where I get Politically Incorrect

    Genius. So simple. So true.
    LC cmblake6, Imperial Black Ops Technician recently posted..Hmm, what does THIS guy know?My Profile

  14. 14
    Princess Natasha, Resident Imperialist Warmonger growls and barks:

    Let us all pause and pray to whatever deity each of us chooses to claim allegiance to that this abysmally cluefucked fucktardian douche-slurper has not managed to reproduce. When they sentence him, may castration be on the list of punishments, because Mother Earth cannot afford another idiot added to what is already critical mass. Amen.

  15. 15

    Princess Natasha, Resident Imperialist Warmonger @ # 14: Hooah, ma’am!
    LC cmblake6, Imperial Black Ops Technician recently posted..Some serious thought about surviving.My Profile

  16. 16
    VonZorch Imperial Researcher growls and barks:

    Princess Natasha, Resident Imperialist Warmonger @ #:14
    Roger that.

  17. 17
    Radical Redneck growls and barks:

    Let us all pause and pray to whatever deity each of us chooses to claim allegiance to that this abysmally cluefucked fucktardian douche-slurper has not managed to reproduce

    I’m afraid he already has. :-(