On fishes and stage fright

So – Handed the keys to this shiny and sexy machine called the Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler earlier today – I careened home through the desert in my SUV – O -DOOM at high rates of speed… Hey I can do that – gas is 80 cents a gallon over here, and after stomping on Mother Gaias’ ample ass with my oversize carbon footprint ….I couldn’t wait ! Man – I was going to blog something fantastic !

Well I got home, plugged in the trusty laptop and turned the key – and guess what ? Nutin’…dead silence…. no screaming musepower erupted to shake the rafters and strike fear in the hearts of mere mortals…well shit.

So somewhat perplexed…I made coffee, checked the oil, kicked the tires….and I mused and I daydreamed, and still nothing – then it dawned on me- “Dude you got stage fright!” And I do.

– Oh I know – “you’ve been posting here forever – you got your own blog – quit being a pussy!!11!!”

But if anyone thinks that the stuff these guys find to write about is easy; especially the way they do it…let me tell you it ain’t.

I guess I can whip out something on my little old blog and – really truth be told….. it never goes anywhere – it gradually gets sent further down in the cue and a comment here a comment there is about all I see. It’s an echo chamber.

Compared to this place well that blog is sort of – it’s safe mostly… a place where possibly thousands of people aren’t going to look at it and say – “WTFO Emperor!!??!? … this dude is whacked – call the men with the white coats – he’s over the rainbow coo-coo for coco puffs….” And start sending hate mail calling for my head on a pike outside the palace gates..I can see it now – virtual rotten tomatoes and spoiled cabbage flying my way….The howls of laughter from the Imperial Overlords ….*shudder*

This place isn’t like my little blog about an old car and some gun stuff at all – there’s more hits in a day here than my little site would see in a month – maybe 2 or 3 – so yeah I got me a case of the stage fright. It sobering to contemplate.

Then there’s the boss… Something was said – something about flying a cargo plan full of rubber dog shit to Hong Kong through a hail of Imperial SAM’s if I screwed this up – or was that a movie? No pressure tho…right?

So as I mulled over this problem – I sipped my java and I stared at the fish. Yeah I got fish – I rented a furnished flat over here in the sand pit when I returned, and it came complete right down to this 150 gallon monstrosity of a tank populated with Koi and some other odd orange angel fish looking things. No clue what they are called.

It’s quite the set up – but hey I didn’t pay for it so kudos to the previous tenant. I feed them twice a day – and they …well they swim around in their little water world – totally oblivious to the fact that their lives are in the hands of a maniac deathbeast conservative …Er I mean  compassionate animal loving tree hugging ….

Then it dawned on me – those fish remind me of something….something about them being 100% dependent on another entity for their survival. Oh yeah that would be the 47% out there ….dependent on the whims of slimy politicians – suckered into thinking those same politicians give a rats ass about them or their families because they hand out food stamps and a pittance in cash every month….and sadly unlike the fish here who have an excuse, they were captured or bred into captivity after all..The 47% are voting for it. Sometimes more than once even…

They keep right on voting for the scraps and the handouts of their chain holders….and like those fish – they are utterly unaware of the fact their very survival depends on the largess of government. Or in the fishes case – me. In either case they are well and truly screwed…in fact I give the fish the better chances, as long as I don’t forget to feed them that is and my memory ain’t all that good ……

 

 

 

 

 

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I’ve been accused of having issues but never performance issues -snarf- -gwaf- -snort- Hang in there, it’ll cum er come…. Speaking of which, why did you have to beg? The Emperor had a bunch of Gamorrean Prison Guards throw a net over me and drag me down to the the Imperial Dungeon Gameroom and threatened me with never ending videos… Read more »

LC Ohio Right Wing Nut

The question is…How do we wake up fish in the tank to the Idea that there is a great big ocean out there with endless possibilities as long as they want to venture out on their own? Are there sharks? Sure is, and you could get eaten, but still a whole shit ton better than swimming around in a cube… Read more »

angrywebmaster

LC Ohio Right Wing Nut @ #:

How do we wake up fish in the tank

Depth Charge? :em01:

LC PrimEviL

Your jitters are quite understandable. His Imperial Nastiness, et all are a tough act to follow. Sort of like an
unknown comic being asked to do the closer for The Blue Collar Comedy Tour.

bruce

are you in raghead land and if so,WHY

Darth Venomous

Top 10 reasons I wanted to write on the Rott

…really needs to be its own post. :em05: :em01:

Lady M-ITT™-Imperial Sniper G.L.O.R

LC IB CiSSnarl5.7 Imperial Foriegn War Correspondant says: I’m actually a nefarious Al Gore plant – in 30 days flat everyone here will believe global warming is real Uh huh…don’t forget I can change the locks on that liquor cabinet faster than Mope can pop the top on a Sam Adams. I’m not the Imperial Trash Technician for nuthin! totally… Read more »

LC Gladiator

Im jealous Snarl…I post more than you do. But….WELCOME

Weyland

– There’s 72 Virgin Imperial Sex Slaves – my reward in the afterlife – the boss said so…no really!!

Hutts my boy, 72 virgin Hutts. Your very own harem. :em05:

LC 0311 Sir Crunchie I.M.H., K.o.E.

LC IB CiSSnarl5.7 Imperial Foriegn War Correspondant says:

Guess we know who’s REALLY in charge around here …..

If Mrs. M ain’t happy….

LC IB CiSSnarl5.7 Imperial Foriegn War Correspondant @ #: There’s 72 Virgin Imperial Sex Slaves – my reward in the afterlife – the boss said so…no really!! Bad news for ya. The only virgins that make it to heaven are 300+ lbs, ugly and more than likely man hating lesbians It may be eternity but I don’t look on it… Read more »

LC Ohio Right Wing Nut

angrywebmaster says:

Depth Charge?

Ummmm…thats not really a wake up, but I am with ya brother :em01:

LCBren

That office down the hall is mine. The one guarded by the kangaroo with the M15? Don’t annoy him…. :em05:

LC Ohio Right Wing Nut

LC IB CiSSnarl5.7 Imperial Foriegn War Correspondant says:

– I went full on redneck mode and decided to yell “HEY’YAL WATCH THIS!!!

As a Redneck myself, I know that never ends well :em05:

LC Ohio Right Wing Nut

LCBrendan says:

The one guarded by the kangaroo with the M15?

The Gubmint outlawed that there mean weapon, your kangaroo is now armed with a rape whistle and a strongly worded message from the U.N.

Lady M-ITT™-Imperial Sniper G.L.O.R

LC 0311 Sir Crunchie I.M.H., K.o.E. says:

If Mrs. M ain’t happy….

:em05:

LC Sir Clambake, Imperial Black Ops Technician, K.o.E.

Corngranulations, mi amigo. Cover your 6.

LCBren

Huh? What? Armed Kangaroos …Jimminy! what the hell did I GET MYSELF INTO NOW….

He’s a good bloke once you get to know him.

And as long as you keep your mitts OUT of my liquor cabinet?

LC 0311 Sir Crunchie I.M.H., K.o.E.

LCBrendan says:

He’s a good bloke once you get to know him.

And as long as you keep your mitts OUT of my liquor cabinet?

He and I have an agreement. He looks the other way, I share your booze with him. Ain’t ya noticed his rosy cheeks lately. 🙂