“Because, you know, sending out 2.1 million (that’s six zeroes, which is six times more than we have in the Oval Office) pink slips on November 2nd? Not good for Chocolate Jeeebus, not good at all, so you’re herewith invited, nay ordered to ignore the law. For the Common Good and the Glorious People’s Utopia of Next Tuesday™.

Obama’s Labor Department is trying to spare the president the embarrassment of having hundreds of thousands of layoff notices arrive in the mail just before Election Day, including in the crucial swing state of Virginia. It issued a guidance yesterday to defense contractors that just happened to advise them not to send federally-required warnings to their employees that they could get pink slipped because Washington can’t get the budget under control.

At issue is a regulation called the Worker Adjustment and Retraining Notice Act, which requires federal contractors, especially ones with Pentagon contracts, to send notices to their workers 60 days before their contract is expected to terminate. The point is to give the workers a heads up and time to get new employment or seek training.

Except the 2.1 million workers about to be laid off in the Glorious People’s Castration of the DoD would be required to get their pink slips no later than November 2nd and, well, something else is scheduled to happen on November 6th. Not that we think for a second that the two are related, nosirree. That would be doubleplusungood for us to suggest and, of course, RACIST!

Expect the Ogabe Steno Pool to be breathlessly covering this. Of course they won’t. They’re busy howling and screaming at Romney in their whiny, nasal pleas for attention.


“Governor Raaaaaaaaamneyyyyyy, what about the palestiiiiiiiniannnsssss?”

Oh how we love the plaintive wails of the irrelevant, useless wastes of oxygen.


0 0 votes
Article Rating

By Emperor Misha I

Ruler of all I survey -- and then some.

Newest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
August 1, 2012 13:06

Someone educate me, ifyouplease…can the Labor Dept. in fact determine whether or not contractors follow this law? What I mean is, is this law optional based on whatever the Labor Dept. decides it wants to do at any given time?

August 1, 2012 19:07

May a clerk at the Department of Labor have a divinely inspired realization that “the law is the law”, such that they send out the legally required notices on time, or even a little before.

Lord, hear our prayer.

LC Sir Clambake, Imperial Black Ops Technician, K.o.E.
August 1, 2012 21:37

Emperor Misha I says:

Or are you following the usual Liberal Democrat Socialist Directive of “the people are fucking idiots, but we can’t really say that out loud”?

But, of course.

Fa Cube Itches
Fa Cube Itches
August 2, 2012 00:36

Well, what sort of government would deliberately antagonize its military when it might just need it for beating down unruly peasants.

LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech, Imperial Photographer, K.o.E.
August 2, 2012 08:08

They’re waxin’ poetic over at Tha Cube

August 2, 2012 09:45

No, not racist. Just recalcitrant and a bit truculent on the part of Congressional Republicans who will absolutely not agree to any tax increases on the rich — even when being handed the largest spending cuts in history on top of it. Largest spending cuts in history? You’ve got to be kidding. In order to have a “spending cut” you’ve… Read more »