Why Not Just Resign Already?

We mean, really. This is getting ridiculous. It’s like a paraplegic picking out the biggest guys in the bar and screaming “oh yeah? Suck my dick, because I’m gonna beat y’all’s asses!”

The Catholic Church (indeed anybody who gives a shit about freedom of religion, association and conscience), dissing the Unions in Wisconsin once he realized that he didn’t want the stench of defeat on him, taking a deuce in the cornflakes of Americans of every color and social strata by “evolving” into a gay president just in time to keep that sweet, pooftah Hollyweird money rolling in, pissing off every business owner in America, big and small, by telling them that they owe everything they have to Big Gummint and didn’t achieve jack diddly on their own, and now THIS?:

Obama, speaking Wednesday evening to the National Urban League, affirmed his belief in Americans’ right to own guns, but he singled out assault rifles as better suited for the battlefield.

“I believe the Second Amendment guarantees an individual the right to bear arms,” Obama said. “But I also believe that a lot of gun owners would agree that AK-47s belong in the hands of soldiers, not on the streets of our cities.”

We don’t know where to start, but we’ll get to the main point eventually. It’s just that Teh Stoopid™ is so Dumbfoundlingly Dense in that pile of verbal diarrhea that we feel strangely compelled to point out a few “minor” things first:

1) The last time anybody was murdered by a civilian in legal possession of an AK-47 in the United States was — NEVER. So we fail to see how banning legal possession of something that is already illegal unless you happen to have a Class 3 license is going to accomplish anything.

2) “Belong in the hands of soldiers?” Whose soldiers, pray tell. Once again, the Jug-Eared Marxist Dilettante is confused as to what country, exactly, it is that he’s president of, it would appear.

3) Yes, an AK-47 is, indeed, an actual “assault rifle.” It has a full auto setting. Which is why, coincidentally, it’s already illegal to possess unless you have the aforementioned Class 3 (also known as the Advanced FBI Proctoscopy™) license. The Aurora Subhuman wasn’t anywhere near an actual AK-47. And if he had been, he would have already been in violation of laws already on the books. What? You’re going to put full auto rifles on Super Double Secret Socialist Utopia of Next Tuesday Probation™, you insufferable twat?

But then, but then, having already won the World Series of Stoopid™, he walks up to the plate and hits a home run with bases loaded, just because he can, and puts himself in the middle of the biggest shitload of bad news coming by picking a fight, officially, with the NRA and every single American citizen who cares about the Second Amendment by threatening to revive the dead, dead corpse of the Weapons That Make Liberal Fascists Wet Their Diapers Ban™.

Congratulations, you dumb fuck, you just made sure that the only demographic still willing to support you is Markotz “Screw ‘Em” Moulitsas.

You are so very, very, very, VERY fucked, little one.

Oh sure, tomorrow we’re all going to hear how you “didn’t say that”, and it’s going to be every bit as successful as when you claimed that you didn’t say “you didn’t build that” when you, and we quote you directly, said “you didn’t build that.”

You just have to be the most inexcusably daft pile of pig’s droppings ever to step into a political arena. No fucking wonder that your college transcripts are a more closely guarded secret than what really went on at Area 51 or, for that matter, who really shot J.R. Ewing. You have the IQ of the congealed mess left over from a 24 hour bukkake marathon, the situational awareness of Publius Quinctilius “Oh What A Lovely Forest” Varus and all of the natural charm of a child molester at a junior swim meet.




  1. 1
    Fa Cube Itches growls and barks:

    I believe the Second Amendment guarantees an individual the right to bear arms,” Obama said. “But I also believe that a lot of gun owners would agree that AK-47s belong in the hands of soldiers, not on the streets of our cities.”

    Dude needs to talk with his attorney general, ’cause that guy thinks AK-47s belong in the hands of Mexican drug cartel killers. To-may-to, to-mah-to, I guess.

  2. 2
    angrywebmaster growls and barks:

    I’ve not handled an AK47 or it’s civilian semi-auto cousin. I’ve heard it is so accurate you can hit the broad side of a barn…from inside the barn.

  3. 3
    Just Another Random Nut, GLOR growls and barks:

    This image says it all.

  4. 4
    Just Another Random Nut, GLOR growls and barks:

    Sigh. Last comment got caught by the spam tracker.

    This image says it all.

  5. 5
    Kristopher, LC growls and barks:

    The left are still stuck on the “hunters don’t need that rifle” meme.

    Most shooters these days are not serious hunters. They just like to shoot. And they really like ARs and AKs … even Walmart is selling AR-15s these days.

    They fool themselves by polling groups of Fudds, and finding that a lot of hunters still detest self-loading rifles … but the NRA knows full well what the majority of its members want.

  6. 6
    Just Another Random Nut, GLOR growls and barks:

    Sigh. Misha, your spam tracker thinks I’m a spammer because I wanted to credit the original image. So I’ll just quote it:

    “Gun laws would prevent shooting sprees? Please, tell me more about how criminals follow laws”

  7. 7
  8. 8
    Mark12A growls and barks:

    I guess they forgot that hunting is not the only shooting sport. Personally, I enjoy three-gun competitions plus long-range target shooting. I’ve not killed anyone with either of those weapons.

    However, it’s still early.

  9. 9
    VonZorch Imperial Researcher growls and barks:

    Who are the militia? Are they not ourselves? Is it feared, then, that we shall turn our arms each man against his own bosom. Congress have no power to disarm the militia. Their swords, and every other terrible implement of the soldier, are the birth-right of an American. The unlimited power of the sword is not in the hands of either the federal or state governments, but, where I trust in God it will ever remain, in the hands of the people.

    Tench Coxe, in the Pennsylvania Gazette, Feburary 20 1788

  10. 10
    LC CiSSnarl5.7 Chariot Builder growls and barks:

    For a dude so opposed to guns – He sure has a good sight picture and is locked and loaded – well at least on his own foot…

  11. 11

    Modern weapons in the hands of good citizens are a significant threat to his real agenda and constituency.
    BS is NOT my countryman.

  12. 12
    LC Spare Parts growls and barks:

    Look who’s talking about battle fields. He would send in the marines with wet noodles. Our soldiers in the far east aren’t allowed to fight until the JAG Officer on staff a hundred miles from the fighting gives the green light. Duh! He wants everybody defenseless except his thugs. Chicago is as Chicago does, was, and always will be. And Mayor Ballerina is having binkie withdrawal. (cue violins)

  13. 13
    Bitter Clinger growls and barks:

    Although no-one has mentioned it, I am sure everyone is aware that the production and/or possession of an explosive device or material without the proper license is also illegal. So how, dear Obumfuck, did our lovely mass murderer end up with them?

    Oh, I forgot criminals and people who intend to do truly evil things follow the law to the letter. :em04:

  14. 14

    LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech says:

    Modern weapons in the hands of good citizens are a significant threat to his real agenda and constituency.
    BS is NOT my countryman.


  15. 15
    LC Sir Rurik, K.o.E. growls and barks:

    Won’t the Indonesian Imposter let American citizens have the same class of weapon he endorsed for Libyan civilians?

    You know I really do not want him to resign. I would be much more satisfied if he followed the example of Salvador Allende. That would be another history making precedent, which everyone seems to think so important.

  16. 16
    Secondmouse growls and barks:

    This remark is a matryoshka doll of stupid. This man is an empty suit with a teleprompter. President Chance The Gardener. He doesn’t need to be watched; he needs to be looked after. President Windowlicker.

  17. 17
    Igor, Imperial Booby growls and barks:

    Resign? RESIGN?? :em05:

    That would be the honorable thing to do, and no way in Hell would Ogabe do it.

  18. 18
    LC Gunsniper growls and barks:

    “But I also believe that a lot of gun owners would agree that AK-47s belong in the hands of soldiers,

    I guess it depends on your ” rel=”nofollow”>definition of “soldier”, doesn’t it?

    I’ll bet that jugeared moron still thinks that soundbite was oh so clever. :em07: