Funniest Thing We’ve Read All Day

From a post at Hot Air where Allahpundit is pondering the horror, horror of not raising the debt ceiling so the Congressweasels can keep spending like crack whores because, well, because then we’ll all go bankrupt, default, get dumped, fire will fall from the sky, The World As We Know It™ will come to a horrid end etc.

It still seems to be gospel that there is no other option like, I don’t know, STOP SPENDING??? Nope, we have to continue to spend and spend and spend and spend because that’s apparently the only option open to us, so we must raise the ceiling. Time to raise the bloody roof if you ask us, but we digress.

But that’s not the funny part, that’s just The Usual Stupid™, the truly HILARIOUS bit was this:

A Congress committed to solvency could raise the limit now to preserve the stability of global markets and then get cracking on real budget cuts — and entitlement reform — to start moving us away from that ceiling, never to return. [Emphasis ours – EM]

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

*GASP!, CHOKE!, SNORT!*

BWAAAAAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAHAHA!

*Wipes tears of laughter from eyes*

Sorry, that there is just about the stupidest thing we’ve ever read on the Internets and we’ve been known to read both Democrat Underground as well as the Weekly Standard, so that’s saying something!

It reminds us of another joke just like it, although it was a long time ago. Back in the mid-80s if we remember correctly. There was this enormous problem with millions of illegal immigrants flooding across a border as porous as a colander, only with more holes, and everybody, everybody was going “well, no, we certainly can’t do anything about the ones already here, that’s just UNPOSSIBLE!, but have we got a deal for you!: You just give us this one, ONE last amnesty bill and we’ll get cracking on sealing up the borders and cracking down on anybody still managing to get across, no mercy and no exceptions! There’ll never be a problem like it again, we swear! Just give us this ONE amnesty first. Honest! We swear!”

So here two and a half decades later… Oh well, you all know the punchline to that one already don’t you?

“Just give us ONE MORE bag of heroin and we’ll quit tomorrow, we PROMISE!”

It’s amazing to us that there are still idiots falling for that or even entertaining the notion of doing so today.

It’s time for smashing crack pipes and putting the Whores of the Potomac through a brutal round of cold turkey.

Really? Give them another blank check to spend our great-great-great-great-great-grandchildren’s money in return for a promise that they’ll really stop spending money after that? SERIOUSLY?

ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR FUCKING GOURDS???

Heck, even if the Republicrats stay true to their end of the bargain (and that would be a historical first of cosmic proportions), just how the fuck does anybody suggest that we get any cuts in spending past the Senate and the White House once they’ve gotten yet another suitcase full of Colombian Marching Powder?

Because they promised they would?

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAH!

You’re fucking KILLING us here!

But hey, there’s one way we could make this work: Make a bill that raises the debt ceiling AND attach a full repeal of OgabeCare as well as a slew of other cost-cutting measures and refuse to vote for it unless it passes, as a whole, unamended.

Fat chance of Weepy John Boner finding the half-a-testicle required to do so, however.

Thatisall.

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LC Timberwolf - Keeper of the Imperial Malinois
LC Timberwolf - Keeper of the Imperial Malinois

Shit. Miliege, read my rant on the previous post. Thank you. Now I shall go puke my fuckin’ guts out in a pure fit of disgust and attempt to sleep thru a fitful night, knowing that reality cannot EVER be as bad as my worst nightmares… Yeah. Right. Uh-huh. And if I’m first fer once, I really don’ give a… Read more »

dcs2244
dcs2244

I read that this morning and had the same reaction as you did, Misha. Did any of us really believe, in our heart-of-hearts, that anything would be different this time around?

Perhaps the people should sponsor a dance for the members of congress; plenty of lamposts in DC… :em02:

Southern Libertarian
Southern Libertarian

Doesn’t surprise me one bit. What does surprise me is that we keep falling for the same line of :em72: every two years. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over expecting different results.

LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech, Imperial Photographer, K.o.E.
LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech, Imperial Photographer, K.o.E.

A Congress committed to solvency could raise the limit now to preserve the stability of global markets

And I’ll just sit here under my blue tarp n’ munch my sorrel weed salad allllll a-glow about allllll them failing countries that our selfless sacrifice propped up a little longer before they hit critical mass.
We’s quite Tha Samaritans,, y’now?