Gotta Love Those Marines!

Posted by LC Sir M - Imperial Tobacconist™, K.o.E. on March 18, 2012

Two Texas Highway Patrol Officers were conducting speeding enforcement on Hwy 77, just south of Kingsville , Texas

One of the officers was using a hand held radar device to check speeding vehicles approaching the town of Kingsville . The officers were suddenly surprised when the radar gun began reading 300 miles per hour and climbing.

The officer attempted to reset the radar gun, but it would not reset and then it suddenly turned off.

Just then a deafening roar over the Mesquite treetops on Hwy 77 revealed that the radar had in fact locked on to a USMC F/A-18 Hornet which was engaged in a low flying exercise near this, it’s Naval Air home base location in Kingsville.

Back at the Texas Highway Patrol Headquarters in Corpus Christi the Patrol Captain fired off a complaint to the US Naval Base Commander in Kingsville for shutting down his equipment.

The reply came back in true USMC style:

‘Thank you for your letter….

You may be interested to know that the tactical computer in the Hornet had detected the presence of, and subsequently locked on to, your hostile radar equipment and automatically sent a jamming signal back to it, which is why it shut down.

Furthermore, an Air-to-Ground missile aboard the fully armed aircraft had also automatically locked on to your equipment’s location.

Fortunately, the Marine Pilot flying the Hornet recognized the situation for what it was, quickly responded to the missile system alert status and was able to override the automated defense system before the missile was launched to destroy the hostile radar position on the side of Hwy 77 So. of Kingsville.

The pilot suggests you cover your mouths when cussing at them, since the video systems on these jets are very high tech.

Sergeant Johnson, the officer holding the radar gun, should get his dentist to check his left rear molar. It appears the filling is loose. Also, the snap is broken on his holster.’

Semper Fi

Category Categories: Funny Shit  |  Tag Tags:  |  Comments 39 Comments »

39 comments

  1. 1
    Mike M growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 00:25

    It looks like in Georgia they’ve actually developed a pretty fair working relationship with military air assets….

    “Speed Enforced by Aircraft”

  2. 2
    LC cmblake6, Imperial Black Ops Technician growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 00:49

    I don’t care who you are, that’s funny right there.
    LC cmblake6, Imperial Black Ops Technician recently posted..Now that that is out of the way,My Profile

  3. 3
    Tallulah growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 00:49

    Fucking-A!!! love them.

    Go see ACT OF VALOR — the first twenty minutes will have you OUT OF YOUR SEAT and CHEERING!!! And the end will make you weep.

  4. 4
    Tallulah growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 00:52

    RED ALERT, RED ALERT — GENERAL QUARTERS

    Some of you may not have heard of this yet because the order was just issued on Friday.

    In the name of an undefined “national emergency” and the declared need to prepare Americans to “respond” to the “national defense needs” of the United States, The Obama administration seized authority on Friday, March 16 to commandeer the production, use, and distribution of all resources, public and private, in the country, including agricultural, energy, health, transportation, water, construction, and – just in case something is left out – the catch-all phrase “all other materials, services, and facilities.”

    To do all this, there will be at least TWO new organizations:

    The Defense Production Act Committee (DPAC), comprised of the heads of the departments and offices of the Executive Branch; and

    The National Defense Executive Reserve (NDER).

    Think of the DPAC as the Politburo, and the NDER as Obama’s Brown Shirts (his “civilian army”).

    The actual executive order can be found here:

    http://www.whitehouse.gov/the-press-office/2012/03/16/executive-order-national-defense-resources-preparedness

    Don’t believe me? Google this: “obama issues executive order martial law march 16″

    The Obama administration seized authority on Friday, March 16 to commandeer the production, use, and distribution of all resources, public and private, in the country,

    The Obama administration seized authority on Friday, March 16 to commandeer the production, use, and distribution of all resources, public and private, in the country,

    The Obama administration seized authority on Friday, March 16 to commandeer the production, use, and distribution of all resources, public and private, in the country,

    WHAT THE FUCK????????????

  5. 5
    Draven32 growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 01:09

    I’ve heard the same joke, with the aircraft being a Harrier and it happening on the UK coast, a F-18 near the California coast, etc etc etc.

    Tallulah: looks like pResident Zero still doesn’t get that whole “constitution” and “congress” thing. Look for a manufactured emergency for him to test it with sometime before November.

  6. 6
    angrywebmaster growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 03:46

    Tallulah @ #:
    I mentioned this on the Breitbart thread yesterday. I also posted it to my blog as well.

    There’s a lot of discussion and arguments going on regarding this order. Apparently one version or another has been around for decades.

    Of course, I think the whole order is unconstitutional and has been since the first variation came out.
    angrywebmaster recently posted..Obama preparing for suspending the constitution?My Profile

  7. 7
    LC Xystus growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 04:34

    @#4:

    Think of the DPAC as the Politburo, and the NDER as Obama’s Brown Shirts (his “civilian army”).

    Doesn’t appear to work that way–which is fortunate for them!

  8. 8
    Cannon Fodder growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 06:19

    (b) assess on an ongoing basis the capability of the domestic industrial and technological base to satisfy requirements in peacetime and times of national emergency, specifically evaluating the availability of the most critical resource and production sources, including subcontractors and suppliers, materials, skilled labor, and professional and technical personnel;

    Is it just me or does this part give authority for forced labor?

  9. 9
    Mark12A growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 08:19

    This takes the place of an earlier, similar EO. However, I can’t trust this so-called-president with this authority any farther than I could toss his big-assed wife.

  10. 10
    LC ShadowFox growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 09:13

    That’s some good trainin’ right there now.

  11. 11
    LC Mike in Chi growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 09:22

    Cannon Fodder says:

    Is it just me or does this part give authority for forced labor?

    Just Ober-Bama fulfilling his campaign promise of Hopeless and Chains.
    Oh, wait…
    He said ‘Hope and Change’…
    Well, anyway, I hope they don’t nab me, I’ll have to change a bit of the landscape.
    And if you think this is just C/T soup for Libertarians here’s a document dump…
    It is not just 0′s E/O’s, these Final Solutions;trade& go back to the ’40′s.

  12. 12
    LC Mike in Chi growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 09:23

    Hmmm… that would be “Final Solutions™”

  13. 13
    LC Grammar Czar, G.L.O.R. growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 09:58

    Regarding the EO that Tallulah referenced: the scariest part for me was not what she included, but what she left out: the part about how it’s for BOTH emergency and NON-emergency. WTH would the president need to seize anything for a non-emergency?

  14. 14
    LC Grammar Czar, G.L.O.R. growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 10:03

    Section 201:

    (b) The Secretary of each agency delegated authority under subsection (a) of this section (resource departments) shall plan for and issue regulations to prioritize and allocate resources and establish standards and procedures by which the authority shall be used to promote the national defense, under both emergency and non-emergency conditions.

  15. 15
    Iacobus growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 10:27

    LC Grammar Czar, G.L.O.R. says:

    Section 201:

    (b) The Secretary of each agency delegated authority under subsection (a) of this section (resource departments) shall plan for and issue regulations to prioritize and allocate resources and establish standards and procedures by which the authority shall be used to promote the national defense, under both emergency and non-emergency conditions.

    I would love to hear from liberals on this. Problem is they’d only squeal if it was a conservative doing it. They’re probably waiting to get in line for the NDER. :em01:

  16. 16
    emily_nelson growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 10:49

    Sounds like rationing of everything to me. And slavery.

    Does this directive allow 0 to suspend elections?

  17. 17
    Mark12A growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 11:45

    I think that Zero is following a logical recipe. He knows if he takes away goodies from the societal parasites, he’ll lose votes and they will riot in the streets. However, the people who work for a living are not going to vote for him anyway. If he raises their taxes and restricts their freedom he’s betting they won’t revolt in any meaningful way, unlike the inner city gangbangers and other welfare suckers. Most will just sit back and let it happen. This EO may be his backup.

    As far as the radar story goes, we were running radar on a street near a local AFB. A beat-up POS volkswagen came chugging toward us, and another officer slightly turned the radar gun onto an aircraft on a straight-in approach and it registered at around 130mph. The traffic sergeant started jumping up and down yelling, “Go get him! Go get him!” thinking it was the VW. It cracked everyone up…but him. It was a very long day after that.

  18. 18
    Igor, Imperial Booby growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 14:23

    Mark12A @ #17:
    We had the BUFFs landing at Minot AFB in the 70′s, the LE’s kept burning out their radar (the microstripline receiver was cooked, for those of you who know what I am talking about) and the company that makes them was billing the USAF for all of the “non-warranty” repair.

    It seems the LE’s were bored and pointing the guns at the BUFFs that were taking off/landing, and the ECM was turned on. And for those of you that know ECM, the function switch was set to “kill” instead of “stun” or “confuse”. Remember, this is an operational SAC base Bomb Wing… and those jammers have the capability to put out MEGAwatts of power…

    The Base Comander sent a little letter to the Commander of the SP/LE people telling them, “Don’t Do That” and a letter to the Air Wing Commander saying “Put the ECM in standby when taking off/landing, please!”.

    We all had a good yuk about that one, even though I wasn’t associated with either party. :em05:

  19. 19
    Mark12A growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 14:57

    Sounds like a pretty good way to get out of writing radar tickets. When they went to court, there was ALWAYS a lawyer involved. More trouble than a $25 (at that time) ticket was worth, at least to me.

  20. 20
    The Irish Dragoness growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 15:29

    Very, very funny!

  21. 21
    LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 17:42

    Draven32 says:

    Look for a manufactured emergency for him to test it with sometime before November.

    Me t’inks that’s JUST what the ows round II is about.
    If Arizona successfully defends her voting laws, he’ll lose the foreign AND the deceased vote there.
    It’s more than critical that he not get the second term… as that’s the one where they go completely batshit, ‘not worrying about being re-elected n’ all.
    LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech recently posted..

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  22. 22
    LC HJ Caveman82952 growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 17:51

    How do you pull over a B-52?

  23. 23
    angrywebmaster growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 18:58

    LC HJ Caveman82952 @ #:

    How do you pull over a B-52?

    By asking very nicely with many uses of the word “Please?” :em05:
    angrywebmaster recently posted..Obama uses Peg Bundy economicsMy Profile

  24. 24
    emily_nelson growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 19:00

    LC HJ Caveman82952 says:

    How do you pull over a B-52?

    With an F-4?

  25. 25
    LC Sir Rurik, K.o.E. growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 19:26

    Tallulah @ #4:
    Of course the usual accomodationists will find reasons to reassure us this is nothing but a warm and fuzzy move along move along
    Being iof a suspicious nature, I judge things by their context, and the prior record of he who does the deed – in this instance the King of Clubs and all he has wrought during the last three years or so. And in the context of tne newly announced Stellar Wind. For another opinion, you might like to catch some further opinions here.

  26. 26
    LC Spare Parts growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 19:29

    A lady friend in Indy never used to get tickets before the new technology came into use. Her old dental work had a range of almost a mile and a half. Of the new Executive Orders: all the material wealth of this country is now Government property unless the Demoncrats don’t want it. Better buy a second hand lap top and a few cheapie transistor AM/FM radios as well as a supply of ditch phones. First thing they’ll go for is our lines of communication.

  27. 27
    LC Sir Rurik, K.o.E. growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 19:41

    Mark12A @ #9:
    Implementation is likely to be made by various of he Forty Unelected Czars (not to be confused with the Forty Thieve, a more reoutable bunch). If that reassures you any. :em06:

    LC Mike in Chi @ #11:
    How about Hype and Chains?

    Some people I have learned to heed suggest this EO is, in itself, martial law in all but the spoken name. This is our Enabling Act.

  28. 28
    Tallulah growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 22:53

    FrontPage Magazine has a LOT more on the Obama power grab, and how it goes MUCH FURTHER than previous such orders (known as the Defense Production Act).

    The Obama administration issued a new executive order last Friday entitled “National Defense Resources Preparedness.” The Executive Order cited the powers granted to the president by the Defense Production Act of 1950, as amended, and the president’s constitutional authority as commander-in-chief as the basis for asserting more breathtaking presidential powers over key sectors of the U.S. economy, not only during wars and national emergencies, but also during peacetime.

    The new [Obama] executive order gives the president and his executive branch agency heads far more power than was contemplated by Congress in the Defense Production Act (“Act”).

    …The difference lies in how much discretion the president has to intervene in and control major portions of the economy if he or his delegated agency heads believe it is appropriate to do so to promote the national defense.

    The Act authorizes the president to prioritize contract performance and to “allocate materials, services, and facilities in such manner, upon such conditions, and to such extent as he shall deem necessary or appropriate to promote the national defense.” The executive order follows this statutory grant as far as it goes, but then goes much further, particularly with respect to the energy industry.

    Part II of Obama’s executive order (“Priorities and Allocations”) delegates to a broad array of executive agency heads the president’s authority over contract prioritization and allocation of materials, services and facilities across all major segments of the private sector economy, including agriculture, “all forms of energy,” “health resources,” “all forms of civil transportation,” “water resources,” and a catch-all for “all other materials, services, and facilities, including construction materials.”

    The executive order delegates to the agency heads, with policy and oversight responsibilities affecting all these different industries, the authority to “issue regulations to prioritize and allocate resources and establish standards and procedures by which the authority shall be used to promote the national defense, under both emergency and non-emergency conditions.” Their authority is be exercised to support programs deemed by the secretary of defense, secretary of energy or secretary of homeland security to be necessary or appropriate to promote the national defense.

    The Defense Production Act does not purport to affect so many industries. For example, nowhere are “health resources” even mentioned, much less defined, in the Act, as it is in the [Obama] executive order.

    The [Obama] executive order is particularly over-reaching concerning the energy industry sector. When setting forth the president’s powers with respect to “the allocation of, or the priority performance under contracts or orders…relating to, materials, equipment, and services in order to maximize domestic energy supplies,” the Defense Production Act places strict conditions on the exercise of such powers.

    See the rest here: http://frontpagemag.com/2012/03/19/another-obama-power-grab/

    Oh, shit, just one more snippet: Dig THIS.

    The Obama administration’s executive order skips right over the special statutory limitations on its executive authority to intervene in the energy industry sector. Instead, the Obama administration gives itself the direct authority to centrally manage the entire energy industry, encompassing fossil fuels and all forms of alternative energy, whenever and however it deems “necessary” or “appropriate” to promote the national defense.

  29. 29
    Tallulah growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 23:02

    SO, the conservative websites who dismissed this as “been there, done that” obviously Did Not Read the Memo. You know, the part where O’fuckface has granted Itself the power to Rule the nation like a fucking Fascist Dictator. Literally: the Fascist brand of socialist will let you keep your nameplate on your office door and the deed to your house, but you are no longer your own master: you are his slave in all but name.

    By the way, I saw this on another conservative website a couple of years ago. Worth quoting.

    Every now and then I decide to ban a commenter here. . . .

    Sometimes it’s not obscene, but so obviously of the “nah-nah-nah-nah-nah,” variety, merely insulting and taunting with no other content whatsoever. That’s an easy decision, as well; I’m not interested in that sort of discussion.

    Sometimes it takes a bit longer to determine that it’s time to ban someone from commenting here. A person comes in and there’s some rudeness and taunting, but also a few substantive issues are raised. Some of these people end up staying here because, although I disagree with them and they disagree with me, in the main their comments are an attempt to engage in at least a somewhat respectful discussion of the issues.

    Or there’s not a lot of nastiness, but it’s clear that the commenter is taunting in a different way:

    – never answering a question another commenter asks,
    – constantly moving the goalposts in an attempt to make everyone explain over and over, but never listening,
    – always misinterpreting and misrepresenting what I’ve said in a post.

    It’s easy to recognize, and tends to emerge over time. . . .

    After a while it usually becomes clear which sort of poster a person is.

  30. 30
    Tallulah growls and barks:
    March 19, 2012 at 23:21

    You know, I wonder — HOW THE FUCK DID WE MANAGE TO FIGHT WORLD WAR FUCKING TWO WITHOUT THIS GODDAMN “DEFENSE POWERS ACT,” EVEN??

    Let alone Obama’s I AM THE SOLE RULER OF THE UNIVERSE Executive Fucking ORDER????? I mean, how EVER did we MANAGE?

    God damn the Democrats. THEY started this shit. FDR packing the Supreme Court. Truman trying to take over the nation’s steel industry during Korea. The Cocksucker in Chief using the Constitution as his own personal loo roll. And the Useful Idiots lapping it up, good old totalitarian Cult of Personality style.

  31. 31
    LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech growls and barks:
    March 20, 2012 at 07:03

    ‘Could have saved a lot of copy paper by simply stating
    “Any and all persons and things not included are hereby deemed included.” :em08:

  32. 32
  33. 33
    LC Sir M - Imperial Tobacconist™, K.o.E. growls and barks:
    March 20, 2012 at 07:37

    On a totally unrelated note, wish me luck. Interviewing next Monday for a position as a Product Tech Support Specialist at a place where you could probably say I know the product: Cheaper Than Dirt! Job would entail doing customer support via email and web chat, and maintaining the website.

    And no, that doesn’t mean I can get you a discount! :em05:
    LC Sir M – Imperial Tobacconist™, K.o.E. recently posted..Today’s ThoughtMy Profile

  34. 34
    Bones growls and barks:
    March 20, 2012 at 07:51

    Good luck with that! If ya get the job can we get discounts? You could always start at Rottie 10% off day, every other day? :em05: :em01:

  35. 35
    LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech growls and barks:
    March 20, 2012 at 08:12

    Fantastic score Sir M!
    ‘How ’bout a headzup on upcoming specials n’ closeouts?

  36. 36
    LC Sir M - Imperial Tobacconist™, K.o.E. growls and barks:
    March 20, 2012 at 08:29

    LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech says:

    Fantastic score Sir M!
    ‘How ’bout a headzup on upcoming specials n’ closeouts?

    That, I’m pretty sure I can do!
    LC Sir M – Imperial Tobacconist™, K.o.E. recently posted..Today’s ThoughtMy Profile

  37. 37
    LC Sir M - Imperial Tobacconist™, K.o.E. growls and barks:
    March 20, 2012 at 08:33

    When you really want a job, it ain’t necessarily the resume that gets you the interview, pups. It’s all about the cover letter! Here’s mine…

    I read with great interest your job posting on Craigslist for a Firearms Industry Product Support Specialist. I believe this job and I are perfectly matched as it would allow me to combine my expertise and experience in a field I’m passionate about – firearms – with my exceptional communication and computer skills.

    I’m a life-long gun owner, avid shooter, occasional hunter and general gun nut. I’ve owned all types of firearms, shot competitively (IPSC), and am a current CHL holder. Back in the early 1980s I completed a correspondence course in gunsmithing, obtained a Federal Firearms License, and (partnered with a Master Gunsmith) owned and operated a small repair and custom shop in Rio Rancho, New Mexico.

    I’ve done firearm repairs, installed accessories such as sling swivels and recoil pads, mounted scopes, built custom AR-15 rifles and 1911 pistols. I’m conversant about all types of firearms from military antiques to modern sporting and defensive arms. I’ve reloaded my own ammo, understand ballistics, and am conversant and knowledgeable about a wide range of firearms accessories. I read the trade publications extensively.

    I have outstanding communications skills, both verbal and written, and am more than comfortable coding in HTML and CSS as well as working in Microsoft Office. I have owned and operated numerous web sites for nearly as long as the World Wide Web has been in existence, and currently operate one site based around a WordPress blog, along with an Internet radio station. I have some skills with PHP and have worked with catalog-based shopping cart systems, MySQL and phpMyAdmin, and various content-management systems.

    Talking with people about guns and working on a website? That’s a dream combination to me!

    I would love the opportunity to interview for this position. I believe I could truly be an asset to your organization.

    That’s how it’s done!
    LC Sir M – Imperial Tobacconist™, K.o.E. recently posted..Today’s ThoughtMy Profile

  38. 38
    LC HJ Caveman82952 growls and barks:
    March 20, 2012 at 09:40

    An impressive resume, Sir….found myself grinning like a fool….if they do not hire you they are crazy!

  39. 39
    LC Gladiator growls and barks:
    March 20, 2012 at 20:56

    Look alive, soldier! We got another door gunner onboard!? Check out the chuckman, he was over in Nam “doing the dance” before any of us (I was there in 69-70). Rise & shine, everyone make sure they’re ready to rock n’ roll, anyone got extra shotgun shells? Maybe the 3 of us can save the world, eh?

    Have a good day gentleman, I salute you, my brothers!