Oh Ferchrissakes!

It’s bad enough that the Food Nazis are sending out inspectors to confiscate little children’s food and humiliating them in front of their peers, now we have the bastard nanny statist meddling swine fucking around with our military too (h/t Jeff G.):

The nutrition education program alerts soldiers that “red” foods like bacon and apple pie should only be eaten rarely, with a warning: “limit intake.” Foods labeled green, however, such as mustard greens, are deemed “premium fuel for the soldier athlete,” “fresh and flavorful” and “nutrient dense.” Soldiers are advised to eat these frequently.

Because nothing helps and feeds a battle-rattle humping trooper more than a heaping helping of rabbit food!

[LTC] Cable represents the U.S. Army Soldier Fueling Initiative, which is remaking dining facilities at Initial Military Training sites across the country. She currently serves as a dietitian and the Chief of the Human Dimensions Division within the Initial Military Training Center of Excellence.

During the panel discussion she advised using the “red, amber, green” system in public schools too.

“My eyes got opened very quickly that it really is a community,” she said, about her visit to Fort Jackson, S.C. seven years ago to observe its dining facilities. “We talk about a village that raises a child.

No, we don’t. Only commie cunts and their retarded followers talk about such nonsense.

How the fuck did that mouth-breathing, knuckle-dragging imbecile ever get her commission? That’s what we want to know. We weren’t aware that they were available from vending machines these days.

Well a community develops a brand new soldier, too. And that’s what we found there.”

“When I got there our dining facilities were typical dining facility type styles, you know, the fried foods, salad bars existed,” Cable continued.

FRIED FOODS, EEEEEEK! Quick, somebody throw some Holy Evian at it!

If you walk into a basic training cafeteria today you will find far fewer fried foods and soda machines have been replaced with “hydration stations,” she explained.

What. The. Fuck. OVER??? “Hydration stations?” Seriously. Tell us that we’re reading something out of The Onion!

“In the military we all kind of know red means, ‘uh oh, there’s problems,’” Cable said. “Amber, middle of the road, we’re doing okay. And green is good to go, all is right. We took that same concept and we applied it to our menus.”

Because, obviously, the same troops who are perfectly qualified to handle, operate and deal out destruction with some of the most advanced technology known to man are just too damn dumb to figure out what food they “ought to” eat without sticking brightly colored labels on it.

Honestly, if we were still in the service and happened to find that flapping cuntmuffin parading her condescending claptrap at our post, we’d be in the brig quicker than you can say “tofu” for pounding a superior officer into an oozing heap of bloody, red meat.

“I had some folks say to me, ‘Well, why on earth did you even include the red ones to begin with?’ Two reasons – one, we’ve got soldiers who have racehorse metabolisms that they needed every calorie I could get into them.

We even have a name for those “soldiers with racehorse metabolisms”. We call them “soldiers”, as opposed to “pencil-pushing, desk jockeying, REMF pogue shitbirds who ought by right to be jettisoned from the back of a cargo plane over Indian Country without the benefit of a parachute.”

You see, they don’t have “racehorse metabolisms”, they just happen to do what you’re obviously unfamiliar with, you parade ground vaudeville “officer” fuckhead, and it’s called “physical labor.” That tends to burn calories. A lot. A lot more, too, than can be easily replenished by a tossed salad with edamame and bean sprouts.

On the breakfast menu oven-fried bacon, sausage gravy, butter, sugary cereal and egg, sausage and cheese sandwiches earn a red label. Assorted low-fat yogurt, oven-fried Canadian bacon, broccoli quiche and cholesterol-free scrambled eggs are deemed “high performance” foods.

“Broccoli quiche?” Things may have changed, we’re sure they have, but in our day even knowing what “broccoli quiche” was, much less having a plate of it in front of you in the mess hall, would earn you a week of finding yourself frequently upside down in a latrine.

What this nation really needs is a full-scale, no-holds-barred, balls to the wall mutiny.

And rope. Lots and lots of rope.

Thatisall.

41 comments

  1. 1
    The Irish Dragoness growls and barks:

    Yea, soldiers aren’t capable of making good choices for themselves so we need to color-code food for them….GIVE ME A BREAK! It’s insulting to treat them like elementary students who have color-coded tags on their food and in their clothes (so they can learn match).

  2. 2
    LC hilljohnny growls and barks:

    it’s been a few years (ok decades) but i seem to recall condition red meant you’re ready to fire, condition amber was a full pitcher of beer and green was the lime jello cubes you could use to play raquetball. ;)

  3. 3
    LC Spare Parts growls and barks:

    If this doesn’t bring on a military Coup, nothing will. DoD dieticians sent by Moochelle need a few of the infamous Viet Nam era chocolate nut rolls shoved up their posteriors.

  4. 4
    LC Gunsniper growls and barks:

    Foods labeled green, however, such as mustard greens, are deemed “premium fuel for the soldier athlete,” “fresh and flavorful” and “nutrient dense.”

    :em05:

    On exactly what planet is this true? All this idiotic rehash of failed nutrition programs past is encourage soldiers to eat at an AAFES cafeteria and go offpost for meals.

  5. 5
    Slightly to the right of Gingis Khan growls and barks:

    I wonder how much of the ONE pan of broccoli quiche that is made for breakfasts gets thrown out each morning?
    I like a salad as much as anyone, it’s a great side dish, goes great with my steak. That being said if you take the main course out of my meal and then expect me to be pleasant…… you’re gonna be in for disappointment.

  6. 6
    dasbow growls and barks:

    She currently serves as a dietitian and the Chief of the Human Dimensions Division within the Initial Military Training Center of Excellence.

    Does that mean she’s eligible for the Montgomery Burns Award for Outstanding Achievement in the Field of Excellence?

    http://simpsonswiki.net/wiki/The_Field_of_Excellence

  7. 7
    LC HJ Caveman82952 growls and barks:

    :em05: Yeah…I can remember these freaks giving lectures on the dangers of smoking to combat vets…..

  8. 8
    LC Light29ID growls and barks:

    She currently serves as a dietitian and the Chief of the Human Dimensions Division within the Initial Military Training Center of Excellence.

    Is this division a sub-sector of the Ministry of Love or Peace or Plenty?

    On the breakfast menu oven-fried bacon, sausage gravy, butter, sugary cereal and egg, sausage and cheese sandwiches earn a red label.

    Otherwise known as a breakfast to give you the energy to slaughter the enemies of Democracy or that prick Lieutenant.

    as opposed to “pencil-pushing, desk jockeying, REMF pogue shitbirds who ought by right to be jettisoned from the back of a cargo plane over Indian Country without the benefit of a parachute.”

    Hey, somebody has to fuck up your pay, leave, travel, transfer and promotion. Who else is gonna do it after a two hour lunch and still be able to hit the club by 1630?

  9. 9
    The Irish Dragon growls and barks:

    All the little fucking worms who spent the last ten years hiding in B-billets and any other non-combat area they could find, all while trumpeting their “service” back home, are coming back out now, and this shitbird is one of them. Those who fought, bled, and killed for their country are being shown the door, and this is just one more reason why. We’d throat-stomp these motherfuckers.

  10. 10
    LC Old Dog growls and barks:

    Shit on a Stick! Someone make this scrunt Google “Farmers Breakfast”!

    There is a reason for the meal, it is for people who are getting ready to work there ass off for the next 10 to 12 hours! You know kinda like Soldiers in the field.

    Oh Wait, this REMF has no idea what “in the field” means!! :em08:
    LC Old Dog recently posted..An Answer for Getting Shit-CannedMy Profile

  11. 11
    mousseman growls and barks:

    Holy crap. Is this the Tofu and Veggie Corps striking back? Or is it they have a budget for some tomato salad advisor, but not for something needed gear?

    One of the few things I will pass on in the US military cuisine is SoS and that MRE with macaroni and cheese because they’re just plain awful. Even with Chili sauce, and rumor has it the stuff we use when we get that wouldn’t make it through the airport control since it’s really tastebud-destroying stuff made in Thailand that will even turn hardcore TexMex marines into whining pussies if they don’t turn into M9A1 instantly.

  12. 12
    LC Xystus growls and barks:

    Mitä helvettiä?

    Was in der fickenden Hölle?!

  13. 13
    LC Gladiator growls and barks:

    This is insane. When you fight and possibly die for your country you should have the right to a can of pop rather than water in the mess hall. With over 10 years in the real military. I had to really make real decisions rather than the pencil pusher lecturer in chief who has a GOD complex, who never even had a real job, who has not made 1 right decision since he was elected, who only knows how to spend other peoples money by the TRILLIONS and never makes decisions unless he gets a partner to share the blame. Remember when he told us not to worry because he would make all the decisions? Well we now have had a US debt down grade on his watch that he has blames the entire world for, even ATM machines, tsunami’s in Japan and weather. I’m surprised he hasn’t blamed Mickey Mouse, but give him time. FIVE TRILLION in new debt in 3 years is a record he cannot hide from. His answer is MORE spending and BORROWING, by the way we BORROW 42 cents if EVERY dollar spent, another record.
    By the way candy bars have been included in k-rations since before war 2. Instant energy in a fire fight situation can SAVE your LIFE. This political correctness in Obama land is the height of stupidity.

  14. 14
    LC Gladiator growls and barks:

    One thought more …. let’s demand that Obama and all his appointed goons serve in the military for a minimum of 6 months before they can resume any duties in Washington. Let’s put them on the ground in Afganistan and see how well they fare with green beans and grapes. And lets not forget to cut their combat pay while they are fighting, and let’s impliment a “trial run” for them paying their own insurance premiums in case they are injured serving this Country!. There should NEVER be any person in government who hasn’t served this country in the military because no one better understands what it means to have freedom. Thank you troops! All patriots in this country want to keep you fed, want to keep you well armed, want you to know your health needs will be provided by the country you protect. The Obama administration does NOT SPEAK FOR US! God Bless you and vote in November to get this imposter out of our White House!

  15. 15
    LC Ogrrre growls and barks:

    OT, but Olympia Snowe (RINO, Maine) has announced she won’t run for reelection. She says she decided not to run because of the polarization of politics in the Senate. Apparently, she has got enough mail from real Republicans telling her that bending over and spreading cheek for the Democrats is not acceptable behavior any more. If her seat (Senate seat, BC! get your mind out of the gutter!) gets taken by a Democrat, there will be no effective difference in voting patterns by the Maine Seanator, whomever it happens to be.

  16. 16
    Secondmouse growls and barks:

    Great. The cancer that is the liberal nanny state mindset has now metastasized to the armed forces, and made it all the way to the rank of Lt. Col.

    What’s next, fuschia BDUs? A scoped Taser rifle?

    Troops running drills shouting “Kill! Kill! Kill! Eat Your Arugula!”?

    I guess we can’t have those readiness and efficiency ratings at traditional levels if the goal is to undermine U.S. exceptionalism.

    I hear there is a growing expat community in Belize, and real estate is still pretty cheap.

  17. 17
    mousseman growls and barks:

    Secondmouse @ #:

    I can already imagine a Marine DI yell “One, two, three, four, we’re in for an aragula tour”.

    And for the fuchsia BDUs…well, make no mistake, they exist. :em07:

  18. 18
    mousseman growls and barks:

    LC Xystus @ #:

    They try this stuff everywhere. Trust me. Maybe US soldiers will put up with SoS, but nobody in Western Europe will. We have more style when it comes to military cuisine.

  19. 19
    LC Ogrrre growls and barks:

    And, just what is wrong with Shit on a Shingle? I like it. That and liver and onions or biscuits and gravy. Sounds like a bunch of pussies around here. :em05:

  20. 20
    rickl growls and barks:

    I wonder what she would think of salt pork and hardtack?

  21. 21
    Mark12A growls and barks:

    Rickl–I don’t think she would think much of it is someone shoved it up her ass.

    They’re trying to turn soldiers into pussies.

    And my favorite breakfast was a stack of pancakes with a fried egg on top with a shit load of bacon. Washed down with about a gallon of paint remover from the coffee dispenser. I’m 61 years old, have off-the-scale low cholesterol, and have slowed down on the bench presses…I can only do 250 pounds.

    Bitch. Send this cunt back to the elementary school where her bullshit would be appreciated. Or at least mostly harmless.

    I swear, that Kenyan bastard is trying to destroy the armed forces…first TriCare cost increases, now this bullshit.

  22. 22
    Mao's Dog growls and barks:

    I can’t believe the hating on the broccoli quiche!! Man I love this dish!

    1) Lots of cheese!! yum!
    2) LOTS of egg proteins and the cholesterol that is a pre-cursor to building testosterone levels!
    3) Broccoli! One of the few veggies I eat!

    Of course if they knew this it would be a “red” food i guess!

  23. 23
    rickn8or growls and barks:

    Well, she certainly spouts all the ooshy-gooshy feel-good buzzwords. Which have absolutely no foundation in reality.

    I have this vision that were she to visit any military mess halls, she would be told to “put on an apron and start making sammitches, or get your ass outta my mess hall!”

    Perhaps I’m dreaming too much.

  24. 24
  25. 25
    readerjp growls and barks:

    You think that’s bad? Take a look at this:

    Debasing Our Military, One Politically Correct Moment After Another
    By Arnold Ahlert

    At Camp Zama in Japan, the Army ordered combat veterans to wear fake breasts and “empathy bellies,” aka “pregnancy simulators” so they can get a better understanding of how pregnant soldiers feel during physical training. The Pregnancy Postpartum Physical Training Exercise Leaders Course, or PPPT, will be expanded worldwide. Each NCO forced to participate in the program must wear the simulator for one hour. “When they first come in, the males are typically timid and don’t feel they have the knowledge to teach female soldiers,” said U.S. Army Medical Activity Japan health promotion educator Jana York. “However, after three days their confidence rises.”

    The family aspects of the Army? The humiliation of “sensitivity training” is more like it. Yet if making a man feel like a women in order to get formerly pregnant soldiers back into shape is considered a necessity, perhaps it is time for women to “understand” what it is like to be a man enduring physical training. Perhaps they too should be forced to “strap on” as it were to fully appreciate what their fellow male shoulders go through.

    The ongoing attempt to turn our fighting forces into a PC-mandated social engineering project. Again in a better world, someone in the chain of command would be forced to offer a cogent explanation as to how and why wearing fake breasts and fake bellies improves combat readiness. Just as troubling is the fact that no one in the chain of command has seen fit to make an issue of humiliating soldiers for sensitivity sake — which may say more about the Army’s current worldview than anything else.

    http://www.jewishworldreview.com/0212/ahlert.php3

  26. 26
    FrankOK growls and barks:

    Who exactly is this whining bitch?
    FrankOK recently posted..Liberalism is a Mental DisorderMy Profile

  27. 27
    Library Czar growls and barks:

    I can tell ya if you took our SOS away there would be a revolt.

  28. 28
    DJ Allyn, Private Citizen growls and barks:

    President Food Stamp’s Theme Song?

    Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.


    DJ Allyn, Private Citizen recently posted..One of Us ~ Joan OsborneMy Profile

  29. 29
    Tallulah growls and barks:

    God. Damn. NATO.

    Just picked this up at Ace of Spades: from Maet’s overnight thread.

    NATO Agrees to Prosecutions for Koran Burnings

    2. After the shameful incident by the US soldiers stationed in Bagram, senior NATO and American officials expressed their deep apologies to the Muslim nation of Afghanistan and assured that such incidents will not happen again.

    3. NATO officials promised to meet Afghan nation’s demand of bringing to justice, through an open trial, those responsible for the incident and it was agreed that the perpetrators of the crime be brought to justice as soon as possible.

    If a trial of the American soldiers who authorized the accidental burning of the korans actually happens, well that’s where I get off the Afghanistan campaign bus and become an opponent of the war. I didn’t support the invasion just to see our military being subject to sharia law by a country of benighted savages. And if that’s where we’ve finally ended up at, then it’s exit time and I don’t want to see another drop or dime of precious American material wasted on a hellhole.

    If we want to keep it from becoming another jihadi sanctuary we can keep blowing up people using drones and bombers and I’m thinking a sustained bombing campaign could make the Khyber Pass well, un-passable.

  30. 30
    Tallulah growls and barks:

    #2 and #3 above are taken from the NATO communique: the last two paragraphs are Maetenloch’s reply.

  31. 31
    simonwise growls and barks:

    Those food Nazis better add lots more of Saltpeter to the chow at Parris Island:

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2107338/Gay-marines-follow-wake-lesbian-home-coming-kiss.html :em05:

  32. 32
    NR Pax growls and barks:

    Ah, the saltpeter rumor. God love whoever came up with an explanation that distracted you from realizing that the reason an erection was impossible is because you were too damn tired in body and soul to care.

  33. 33
    sleeper growls and barks:

    What’s next, algae?

  34. 34
    LC Draco growls and barks:

    I found this – >> LTC Sonya Cable, MBA, RD, LDN - HERE

    Another reason this makes no sense is for the following reasons:

    1. Unlike REMFs who push a desk all day, combat soldiers, on average, do PT every day. (Sometimes THREE times a day, like I used to do),

    2. That being the case, we require higher caloric intake than a REMF,

    3. What are they going to do about the MRE, which those in the field eat!?

    Each MRE provides an average of 1,250 calories (13% protein, 36% fat, and 51% carbohydrates) and 1/3 of the Military Recommended Daily Allowance of vitamins and minerals. A full day’s worth of meals would consist of three MREs.

    4. MREs were designed specifically to increase the caloric intake when in the field or combat zones.

    And how she got her commission I can guess. She was probably a direct commission after getting her degree. And since she is part of the Medical Service Corps, she probably got a direct commission to Captain and has just stayed in long enough to make LTC. Their promotion boards and time in rank requirements are different than the regular, operational branches.
    LC Draco recently posted..Help Support ARMi 501(c)(3)My Profile

  35. 35
    LC Jackboot IC/A growls and barks:

    Mao’s Dog says:

    1) Lots of cheese!! yum!

    Ickkk…..the issue I have with quiche is swiss cheese. That bitter ass shit is not fit for human consumption. I actually heard one of the celebrity chefs on cable say it’s totally useless and that he NEVER uses it.

    sleeper says:

    What’s next, algae?

    Dont forget Chlorella, I take both daily and they’re very good for immune system boost. Interesting side note is that Chlorella was initially developed as a source of protein to be used for emergency food supplies.

    DJ Allyn, Private Citizen says:

    President Food Stamp’s Theme Song?

    Awesome Brudda, Brilliant !!!
    LC Jackboot IC/A recently posted..Our most precious bloodMy Profile

  36. 36
    VonZorch Imperial Researcher growls and barks:

    Jaybear, Colonel of Imperial Ancient Artillery says:

    Shit on a Shingle, broccoli quiche, liver and onions …….
    What’s all that stuff? that ain’t food……THIS is good eatin’

    Dammit, now I have to wipe a quart of drool off my keyboard.

  37. 37
    LC George, Apocryphal Prophet growls and barks:

    I’m a chubby civilian and I’ve lost 13 pounds in the past month and a half on a pseudo-Atkins diet (47 more to go)

    I’m just saying:
    The conventional wisdom on fat and carbohydrates is largely wrong. Not only are the Health Nazis wrong to be fussing to this level of detail on people’s diets, even putting that issue aside, their nutrition advice is wrong. The MRE should be reformulated to give an average of 50% calories from fat, 35% from protein, and 15% carbohydrates.
    LC George, Apocryphal Prophet recently posted..Imam Muhammad Al-Kazzab Warns About FishmasonryMy Profile

  38. 38
    Draven32 growls and barks:

    She’s talking about BASIC TRAINEES at FORT JACKSON… where i went to basic a lifetime ago… where the ‘average’ soldiers has to eat and eat and eat (3000 calories a day plus) in order to not lose weight when they are supposed to be gaining muscle…

  39. 39
    LC Sir Rurik, K.o.E. growls and barks:

    Feed that cow a meal or two of cold Ham-n-mothers.
    As for the arrugula – that food is named for the sound I make when contemplating eating it.
    I bet the military doesn’t serve arrugula or thatd other stuff to hte international refugees they coddle when they’re not being used as props for Hillary, our walking SoS.

    But it gets even worse, fake pregnancy bellies for the soldiers?!

    Our King of Clubs has declared war on our warriors … and the Colonel Blimps have gone over to the enemy. And listen to the recruiting ads, and its all about doing civic action around the wodrld. Fuck it, it I’d wanted to spend two years bringing cookies to strangers, I’d have enlisted in the Girl Scouts.

  40. 40
    LibraryGryffon growls and barks:

    I cut down on grains years ago, because I found out I was allergic to wheat (as in “where’s my inhaler?”) not to mention other GI issues. I decided it was time to lose the baby fat (the youngest just turned 14) last summer, and cut out a lot of grain products. In January I discovered Mark’s Daily Apple, and decided it was time to try Paleo/Primal eating, since I was being good on calories, but hadn’t lost any weight for three months. After almost two months with no grain products, no soy, a lot less sugar, and a LOT more bacon :em01: , I’ve dropped another 10 pounds without counting calories, virtually all of it from my belly. I also have only taken my prilosec twice, both times after giving in and eating something I knew I shouldn’t. Before last summer, if I missed a single dose, I’d be in misery within about six hours. My arthritis doesn’t seem to be anywhere near as painful in the mornings either. I’ve also noticed that I have less grey hairs than I did six months ago, and it’s NOT because they are falling out. They’re just coming in brown again.

    I’d also recommend reading Gary Taubes “Good Calories, Bad Calories”, or his new one, “Why we get fat”, which I’ve been told is similar, but an easier read without the pages and pages of footnotes at the end.

  41. 41
    LibraryGryffon growls and barks:

    LibraryGryffon @ #:
    I should add that I do eat a lot of vegetables, but that’s in addition to lots of meat and eggs, not instead of. And not as much dairy, but when you start eating the good stuff, the Kraft cheddar starts tasting nasty. Now some good goat milk brie…..