And While We’re on the Subject of Rampant Mental Illness

We give you Al Gore, high priest of the Cult of Wormening. And you can keep him. Please.

It’s not that we’re particularly surprised that he recently blamed record snowfalls and unprecedented cold spells on, wait for it, global warming. Him and his cult seems to trip over words and shove their feet in their yaps on an alarmingly regular basis but, then again, what would you expect from an idiot whose only noted scholarly achievement was flunking out of seminary? No, it’s the “explanation” that the big, flabby sack of adipose tissue gave for it.

He said, and we’re not making this up, that the reason for the heavy snowfall was the warmening of the atmosphere causing additional water vapor that then fell as snow.

Yes. Water vapor turns to snow because of warmening. Make a note, children. If you want to make popsicles, you just pick your favorite juice, pour it in a suitable container and heat the everloving fuck out of it. For quicker results use a blowtorch. It will freeze instantly. Hey, the Algore said so, and if one or both of your parents are fiddy2ers, there is no way in hell they’re going to gainsay their cult leader.

Note to the Algore and his retarded followers: If water vapor condenses under warm conditions, then it turns into, this will really blow your minds two remaining, rotting synapses, rain!

Yep. You heard it here first. Now go play in traffic, because your mere presence is causing IQs to drop for miles around.

Thatisall.

28 comments

  1. 1

    Rain,, who’da thunkit.

    I’d figure he has a staffer who’s job is to make sure he comes in out of it.

  2. 2
    LC Jackboot IC/A growls and barks:

    Ohhh Kkkk- Got it !

    Another group of Klueless Klowns said it was because the Arctic was so warm it pushed the cold air farther south. I suppose if that’s the case we Eeeevil Kkkkapitalists should be selling SPF 50 and beach chairs to polar bears.

  3. 3
    LC Anniee451 growls and barks:

    I “knew” globull warming would lead to more snow but now more rain?

    FUCK I gotta get a better umbrella.

  4. 4
    LC Anniee451 growls and barks:

    By the way, the ’70s “global ice ace” seems more andmore likely I know it means warming but GD that ice age seems likely!!!!

  5. 5
    Grammar Czar growls and barks:

    In a similar vein, a few years back, some college students down in Cancun (that would be Mexico, for those of you educated in publik skuuls), circulated a petition to ban Dihydrogen Monoxide. They were amazed at the number of signatures. In response, some computer geek out of Villanova University came up with this site: Dihydrogen Monoxide Research Division

    It’s a riot!

  6. 6

    What was ManBearPig’s major in college? I bet it wasn’t engineering. Fucking dumbass. Maybe he should enroll in Thermodynamics and Introduction to Heat Transfer classes just so he has a clue… However, I do not want to subject female engineering students to this retarded fat fuck’s leering and groping.

  7. 7
    Tallulah growls and barks:

    Gore isn’t stupid, he’s venal. A huckster and con artist. He no more believes the crap he’s peddling than he believes in Jesus Christ.

    How do I know? Look at his mansions and his huge carbon-dioxide “footprint” (fartprint?).

    BTW, clever of the Leftwads to rename carbon dioxide as “carbon.” That’s their chief skill: inverse naming. Ministry of Truth, People’s Democratic Republic of Anything, “Hitler was a right-winger” (granddaddy lie); and on and on.

  8. 8
    rumcrook growls and barks:

    ive recently bought a wood burning stove for my workshop I run my business out of,

    and it burns coal too!

    coal is dirt cheap. I bought enough to heat the shop day and night for a month for 40 bucks

    im going to make a bumper sticker that says something like “I burn coal for heat, so my carbon foot print squashes your carbon footprint” with a little devil smiley face next to it. :em95:

  9. 9
    LC MuscleDaddy growls and barks:

    What bothers me is the blatant and unapologetic lack/denial of simple logic in this – consider:

    We are expected to stop driving, smoking, producing, barbequeing and otherwise dismantle/destroy our economy in order to ‘fix’ Global Warming.

    But IF…

    1) Global warming causes heat

    2) Global warming causes cold

    3) Global warming causes draught

    4) Global warming causes floods

    5) Global warming causes rain

    6) Global warming causes snow

    7) All of these conditions already occur naturally & cyclically in the global environment and always have.

    8 ) There’s no way to determine, with any accuracy, what aspect/degree of human involvement has what-level of effect on AGW.

    … then how are we supposed to know when we’ve “fixed” Global Warming?

    Do we wait around, sweating in the dark for heat/cold/floods/draught/rain/snow to stop happening?

    Just sayin’.

    – MD

  10. 10
    LC MuscleDaddy growls and barks:

    couple of extra 5s & 6s in there – but you ge tthe idea – MD

  11. 11
    hitnrun growls and barks:

    It’s not so much that increased snowfall could not, in theory, be attributed to Global Warming. It’s that decreased snowfall would also be contributed to Global Warming (as one Brit put it, “our children will not know what snow looks like.”), as would hotter summers, cooler summers, drier springs and wetter. Larger, more powerful hurricanes are evidence of global warming, as are a lack of them.

    I’ve even heard a lot of otherwise intelligent people chalk up earthquakes (in ice-free low latitudes, no less) to Global Warming, which, even given all Gore’s predictions, would be like ripping a hole in a blanket with a powerful fart. Undoubtedly – I say this without a shred of sarcasm – when the Yellowstone supervolcano blows, the people attributing this to human activity will far outweigh the Phelps crowd who attribute it to divine retribution for, well, something.

    At a certain point, we’re not talking about science anymore.

  12. 12
    LC MuscleDaddy growls and barks:

    Response to DJ Allyn, ITW @:

    Indeed – I have no problem noting the changes (I can remember getting light snow in central FL back in ’81) but the notion that people are doing it? Really?

    I think I might suspect the single largest source of heat & energy in the solar system, before my old Dodge pickup…

    I really think this stems from an over-inflated sense of self-importance – the notion that somehow “WE” are so powerful, so very important, that “WE” can, without even realizing it, change the course of mighty rivers and bend steel in our bare hands.

    I blame self-esteem training in schools.

    – MD

  13. 13
    R6 growls and barks:

    I would ask how you would account for the snow, but I’m afraid I would get the Intelligent Design explanation.

    Here, let me say this in monosyllabic fashion (that means small words) so that your festering “mind” can grasp it:

    cold

    air

    plus

    water

    makes

    snow.

    You truly are a simpleton.

  14. 14
    R6 growls and barks:

    And damn it all, I got a two syllable word in there. Anybody know a word for water that only has one syllable so we can communicate with deej on his level?

  15. 15
    LC PrimEviL growls and barks:

    Response to LC MuscleDaddy @:

    I blame self-esteem training in schools.

    Personally, I blame Mexicans. Eating all those beans. Ban beans! A major source of anthropogenic methane!

    One other thing puzzles me. Perhaps the Mighty Algore can explain how when more water is evaporating from
    the oceans, and falling as snow, they claim the global sea level is rising; or does it only rise in summer when
    all the snow and ice in the northern hemisphere melts?

  16. 16
    Library Czar growls and barks:

    Well since we are talking about idiots and hypocrites check out these two

  17. 17
    Grammar Czar growls and barks:

    Response to Library Czar @:
    Luckily for their butts, we are Americans first, and we look after our own, regardless.

  18. 18
    Grammar Czar growls and barks:

    Response to R6 @:
    Not sure there is one…you could use the word wet, maybe.

  19. 19
    R6 growls and barks:

    Not sure there is one…you could use the word wet, maybe.

    Thought of that GCz, but was afraid I would confuse deej. I thought of “wet stuff”, but I’m afraid it leaves too much room for deej to draw erroneous and irrelevant conclusions and thus rendering the monosyllabic tactic moot.

    Maybe we should try the Helen Keller approach with deej. We’ll hold his head under running water while smashing his hand with a hammer.

    Or something like that.

  20. 20
    Sir Fresh Sign growls and barks:

    Olbermann going to Al Gore’s CURRENT TV...

    from the New York Times

  21. 21
    LC PrimEviL growls and barks:

    Response to DJ Allyn, ITW @:

    We (and I mean collectively, not as a tiny subset) can’t seem to accept the fact that shit happens in spite of us, and not because of us.

    Yes, but that commonsense world-view wouldn’t set well with the users, controllers, and manipulators. Shaming, retribution, and restitution are the prods by which they rule the world.

  22. 22
  23. 23
    LC LittleRott84 Imperial DJ growls and barks:

    Response to LC MuscleDaddy @:
    My grandpa told me about it. It surprised him as much as the locals, and pretty much everyone resorted to wearing military surplus jackets because that’s all they could find.

  24. 24
    Emperor Misha I growls and barks:

    DJ Allyn, ITW says:

    Gore has the mechanics of it correct — more heat to the ocean puts more moisture than usual into the atmosphere, causing a filter effect to the sunlight hitting the earth. In the Southern hemisphere which is currently in its summer, any precipitation is going to come down as rain. as evidenced in Australia. In the Northern hemisphere, it is harder for the sun to get through the filter caused by the moisture and it comes down as …wait for it… snow.

    No, he doesn’t. He is as ignorant as you would expect somebody who couldn’t hack the sciences to be.

    Otherwise logic would dictate that any cloud formation would lead to precipitation forming as snow which is, at least to those of us who steered well clear of the humanities on campus, patently ridiculous. Cloud cover does not cause a drop in temperature that is more severe in some places than others, as a matter of fact cloud cover provides us with an insulating cover that keeps temperatures up.

    Look it up again. It’s actually the very basis of the Greenhouse Effect which, we were told, is what’s causing all of this alleged anthropological mayhem. Water vapor is the single most effective and most prevalent actor when it comes to the Greenhouse Effect. So much so that carbon dioxide doesn’t even factor in when you compare the two.

    For those of you in the cheap seats: Water vapor increases, relatively speaking, ambient temperature.

    If you’re looking for empirical evidence and don’t trust those silly eggheads and centuries-old and proven equations, think about it:

    Which is colder? A night with heavy cloud cover or a night with clear, starry skies? Or if that doesn’t trigger anything, think about winter nights, because that’s where changes in temperature are more acutely felt, where you had thick cloud cover with snowfall as compared to nights where you had no precipitation and a clear view of the sky. If you think really hard, you may even remember nights where it transitioned from one state to another.

    Again, I’m just trying to jog your memory in case thermodynamics is too hard for you.

  25. 25
    LC Xealot growls and barks:

    In addition to the Emperor’s astute points, I’d also like to add that Gore is not a scientist. He leans on “experts” for any sort of backup to his political hot air. Of course, I’m sure Gore would never be so biased as to interpret the data given to him in the manner that suits his political ideals, nor would he ever put pressure on these “experts” to tell him what he wants to hear, right?

    I’ve got some oceanfront property in Arizona for sale, too.

  26. 26
    Grammar Czar growls and barks:

    Response to LC Xealot @:
    Not only is he not a scientist, if memory serves, he also FAILED what science course(s) he took. I may have just a humanities degree (English, two of ‘em), * :em96: misha*, but even *I* didn’t fail science. :em93:

  27. 27
    Emperor Misha I growls and barks:

    Grammar Czar says:

    I may have just a humanities degree (English, two of ‘em), * :em96: misha*,

    :em93:

    Sorry, dear, I just can’t help it. “Mocking the humanities” is a required course on any science campus in the civilized world. Anything less than a B+ in that one is grounds for expulsion.

    To be fair, however, none of us hard science nuts would want to live in a world where literature was left to physicists and mathematicians, because if there is one thing more likely to NOT offer you anything of emotional value than the thought of “Anna Karenina” written by, say, Niels Bohr, it would be the sight of Rosie O’Donnell naked.

    Oh, and on a more primal plane, if we hadn’t had the humanities around, we’d have had to bring at least two paper bags when picking up our dates for a party. :em93:

  28. 28
    LC Xystus growls and barks:

    Quoth the ITW:

    Gore is just the modern-day version of the delusional medicine man telling us we need to sacrifice ourselves

    That’s been clear (though maybe not to him) for some time.