So glad you asked, and the gentlemen at Watts Up With That have a nice summary for you.

Their whole wish list of retarded, ludicrous, unrealistic and genocidal “demands” is pure comedy gold from one end to the other. Provided, of course, that they never get their way on any of them which, thankfully, seems more and more likely as scandal after scandal rock the Hide the Decline™ “scientists.”

Don’t believe us? How’s this for fun?

1) They want an International Climate Court. Finally a place we can bring suit if the weather gods offend us with too much or too little rain in the summer? Alas, no. It’s a Stalinist kangaroo “court” where industrialized nations will be given enormous fines for their Crimes Against Gaia™, fines that will then be passed on to third world shit holes. If you guessed that said shit holes would be exempt from the rules and the “court”, you were absolutely correct.

2) “The recognition and defence of the rights of Mother Earth to ensure harmony between humanity and nature”. You read that right. An idea whose time has come. A Bill of Rights for Gaia. Humans? Not so much. We have none.

3) “The rights of some Parties to survive are threatened by the adverse impacts of climate change, including sea level rise.” Never you mind that sea level hasn’t risen at all, it has actually dropped, over the last three years, even the most hysterical extrapolations of previous measurements had it at 2 cm/century, max. That’s less than an inch for you metrically-impaired people.

Not to be too harsh, but if your survival is endangered by you being unable to get out of the way of water rising to the frightening tune of 4/5 of an inch a century, then perhaps it is time for your immobile arse to get selected the fuck out of the gene pool already.

4) War and the maintenance of defence forces and equipment are to cease. And about time too! How? Oh, because you decree it so, that’s how. Dammit. How many millennia have we been around and only now does somebody come up with that? D’uh! Wish we’d have thought of that. But blast it, no matter how ridiculous of a statement it is, it’s still a worthy goal. After all, who can dispute that the world would be a better place without war, pestilence, destruction and famine?

Except, of course, that’s not why the AlGore Cultists want wars and militaries abolished. It’s because they pollute the air with CO2. Seriously, we wish we’d made that up, but we didn’t. They actually said that.

5) A drop to an average temperature 1°C above “pre-industrial levels”, whoever the Hades gets to determine what that is. But, by their definition, we’re already 3°C above that level, so they basically insist that we need to make the world 2°C cooler, no matter what it takes. Remember when the EnviroLoons were howling about the Coming Ice Age back in the 70s? So do we. Now they’re actually trying to bring it about. Progress!

No mention as to what we’re going to do about the “rights of some Parties” who’ll suddenly find their farm lands covered with ice as a result. That doesn’t matter. Durban has spoken, and they have, by consensus, declared what the Ideal Temperature™ of planet Earth is. Don’t argue! Consensus = SCIENCE!

6) Think we’re done with the idiocy yet? Think again. It gets worse. The new “emissions targets”, and ONLY for Western countries, is to reduce emissions by “more than 100%” by 2050. Yep. We, and of course only we evil, Gaia-raping rich people, are put on notice to emit more than 100% less than we do now by 2050 which, grabbing our calculator here, means that we’ll have to reach negative emissions by then. No problem. We’ll just have to turn into plants so we can absorb CO2 instead of exhaling it.

7) Then again, turning into plants might not be such a good idea. You see, the geniuses in Durban have also declared that the total amount of CO2 that they will allow in the atmosphere (or we guess they’ll be taking everybody who breathes to court) is about 210ppm. Which is unfortunate, seeing as how it’s well below what plant life needs to survive. And not just unfortunate for the plants either. It’s equally unfortunate for those who depend on them for sustenance (that means “food”) or, for that matter, anybody who needs that pollutant 02 that plants “exhale” (that means “all of us”).

Finally! If only we all follow the edicts of a bunch of unelected psychiatric patients in Durban, then Earth can finally become the barren, rocky, lifeless rock that it was always meant to be!

8) The time for action is now! Because Durban states that this year is as high as emissions will ever be allowed to go, regardless of the consequences of immediately shutting down every industrialized nation in the world (again, third world shit holes are exempt). And if you don’t, then it’s off to “court.”

9) The Evil Industrial Countries have to pay for everything. Of course, all of this insane windmill-tilting is going to cost money, lots of money, and guess who gets a free ride and will not be required to pay a dime? That’s right, third world shit holes. The “reasoning” behind that being that us evil Westerners are responsible for all the evil in the world anyway (including teaching the populations of third world shit holes the wonders of indoor plumbing. Oops. Did we say that? We denounce ourself), so obviously we’ll have to pay for our crimes against, er, Gaia.

But whatever you do, do not call this Glowbull Wormening nonsense a “global redistribution scam” because that would be “unhelpful”, “paranoid” and “totally unsubstantiated by the facts.”

One question, though: With all of that money of ours they’ll be having, just what do they intend to do with it? Eat it? Because if they’re planning on spending it on goods, services, industrial equipment, infrastructure, food etc., we have one thing to ask them:

Who the fuck do you morons think used to MAKE all that shit before you insisted that we shut the factories down?

Huh?

Let the third world go to hell. Along with the Occutards, who also seem to believe that they’re somehow “owed” everything they want.

They can come back when or if they decide to grow up and behave like adults.

Thatisall.

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By Emperor Misha I

Ruler of all I survey -- and then some.

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LC BOATS
LC BOATS
Guest
December 11, 2011 23:22

We all know that these assholes are insane but what continues to amaze me is that they take their self’s so serious. We could shut down every factory and cease to drive any cars and the first time a volcano erupted would erase any thing we may have gained.Even though the statistics they keep shouting about are proven beyond doubt… Read more »

Elephant Man
Elephant Man
Guest
December 12, 2011 00:24

It seems to boil down to this.

The “Third World” hates Yankees but loves the Yankee dollars.

Especially if they don’t have to actually work for the Yankee dollars. 😆

LC Xystus
Guest
December 12, 2011 03:38

Them UN-atics is funny! :em05:

NR Pax
NR Pax
Guest
December 12, 2011 06:21

They’re just so cute. Or maybe it’s because I only had one cup of coffee when I read about it.

angrywebmaster
angrywebmaster
Member
December 12, 2011 06:59

Have you ever heard of Lord Christopher Monckton? Apparently he is NOT a fan of Global Warming. He was at Durban and made some pithy comments in that understated British manner.
:em07:

I also wrote about it, although I will never reach your level of course.
UN wants world climate court
:em06:

angrywebmaster
angrywebmaster
Member
December 12, 2011 07:33

Won’t you have to buy carbon credits when you use ammunition? It can contribute to Globull Worming Climate Change after all. And don’t forget to file an environmental impact statement with regards to all those rotting bodies.
:em05:

LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech, Imperial Photographer, K.o.E.
Guest
December 12, 2011 07:46

(Steps up onto soapbox) Imagine how quickly the CO2 levels would fall if all the folks really freaked out about it decided not to hyperventilate, but to refrain from breathing out any more of if instead. And,, how many trees could we save if we used both sides of the toilet paper… (throws soapbox into fire pit) Anybody that doesn’t… Read more »

LC HJ Caveman82952
LC HJ Caveman82952
Guest
December 12, 2011 09:13

Amen, Misha. A blue helmet on American soil is a target, nothing more.

LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech, Imperial Photographer, K.o.E.
Guest
December 12, 2011 09:48

This from up the street: The 12 reasons I will vote Democrat: 1. I will vote Democrat because I believe oil companies’ profits of 4% on a gallon of gas are obscene, but the government taxing the same gallon of gas at 43% isn’t. 2. I will vote Democrat because I believe the government will do a better job of… Read more »

LC Old Dog
Guest
December 12, 2011 10:15

Emperor Misha I says:

Front sight… center on powder blue spot… lower sight point a notch… squeezesqueeze… squeeze…

FIFY Quit wasting Ammo Dammit! :em05:

LC Proud Infidel
LC Proud Infidel
Guest
December 12, 2011 11:41

If stupidity was water, these treehugger loons would possess enough to cause a flash flood in the Pacific and Atlantic Oceans! :em05:

“Life is hard….It’s harder when you’re stupid.” – John Wayne

“No matter what you try, you can’t fix stupid, stupid is forever.” – Ron White

And those snot-drooling treehuggers are living proof of that!!

VonZorch Imperial Researcher
VonZorch Imperial Researcher
Member
December 12, 2011 11:48

LC Old Dog says:

Emperor Misha I says:

Front sight… center on powder blue spot… lower sight point a notch… squeeze… squeeze… squeeze…

FIFY Quit wasting Ammo Dammit!

It’s not wasting ammo, you need three rounds to hit the brain of anyone stupid enough to wear a powder blue helmet here. :em05:

LC HJ Caveman82952
LC HJ Caveman82952
Guest
December 12, 2011 13:01

Thinking about all this…..consternation in the ranks of blue…… I had a thought……to all you UN goons…..stop and think a minute… How many of you would have given your left nut for a free ticket to America? Where a man with freedom beating in his heart is made welcome….. Well…once you arrive and the opportunity is right…. Turn. Desert. It… Read more »

LC_Salgak
LC_Salgak
Guest
December 12, 2011 15:33

VonZorch Imperial Researcher says: LC Old Dog says: Emperor Misha I says: Front sight… center on powder blue spot… lower sight point a notch… squeeze… squeeze… squeeze… FIFY Quit wasting Ammo Dammit! It’s not wasting ammo, you need three rounds to hit the brain of anyone stupid enough to wear a powder blue helmet here. Come now, three rounds is… Read more »

mousseman
mousseman
Guest
December 12, 2011 17:25

Climate Activism should be a mental health issue, not a political agenda.

WayneB
WayneB
Guest
December 12, 2011 19:37
LC Old Dog
Guest
December 12, 2011 19:44

LC_Salgak @ #:
There you go again! Bringing Handgun Tactics into a Rifle discussion!

“One Shot, One Kill” :em01:

the botnet
Guest
December 12, 2011 20:27

The scariest part of the UN imposition of climate bullshit involves the tortured argument for UN mandates having the force of law here in the US. The line of thinking goes, that since the establishment of the UN was authorized by congress, the UN’s bureaucratic mandates carry the force of law. I’d like to see this litigated, but the fact… Read more »

Lockpick
Lockpick
Guest
December 12, 2011 20:27

LC_Salgak @ #:
“Come now, three rounds is standard: a double-tap and the insurance shot. ”

I try to save that third shot. If it tries to get back up, then it is just another double tap. It really messed me up during the CHL test because every distance had odd shot numbers assigned to it.