BWAHAHAHAHA! *SNORT!* HAHAHAHAHA!

WTF, Srsly?, You’ve GOT to be kidding! etc.

Via Maetenloch’s indispensable overnight open thread, we find one of the most hilarious auto-beclownings in all of history committed by Gun Fearing Nazi Wussies.

The story is that some metrosexual wuss with a vagina complex writing for the always hilarious SF Weekly posted an indignant screed about how evil gun-loving murdering fundamentalists, in this case one Iraq vet who’d had his guns impounded twice for violating the California Volksrepublik’s “assault gun” bans (one of the guns impounded was a standard M1A Springfield, which only goes to prove that IQ testing obviously isn’t part of the hiring process for California Law Enforcement personnel) and then had the nerve, the nerve to sue the state for violating his rights afterwards. Both of which cases he, by the way, won. But how dare he question the Almighty Word of the State? Racist! Shut up! The Almighty State is always right, even when it’s obviously wrong. Quit questioning your betters, peasant!

But that, eminently Fiskable as it is, isn’t what’s really rip-roaringly, side-splittingly, hilariously funny. What’s FUNNY is the graphic that said Gun Fearing Obedient Nanny Slave Wussy posted to help those of us ig’nant enough not to know what an Evil Assault Murder Racist Gun™ looks like:

See something funny there? Go on, don’t rush, we’ve got time.

Really scary guns all, we agree, at least to a liberal. But, then again, a Nerf gun would make one of them piss their pants and void their bowels. But the two weapons that really caught our attention to the point where we’ll fall asleep longing for the day we can put our yearning, Imperial mitts on them are the BR55AT-WW 40MW plasma rifle and M19 SSM rocket launcher.

Of course, we’ll have to wait until the 26th Century when Halo is no longer a science fiction computer game, but it’ll be worth it.

And we’ll get them too, because if there’s really anything to Darwin’s theory of evolution, all the liberals will have turned into rainbow-colored My Little Ponies™ by then none of whom, last we checked, can vote.

Or Soylent Green, but that works for us too.

Thatisall.

11 comments

  1. 1
    LC MuscleDaddy growls and barks:

    “Phased plasma rifle in the 40-watt range.”

    “You know your weapons, buddy. Any one of these is ideal for home defense.”
    LC MuscleDaddy recently posted..Capital Games: Buffet BS.My Profile

  2. 2
    tweell growls and barks:

    That is indeed a funny one, assisted by the disabling of comments or viewing them on the original article. I guess that the ‘journalist’ Joe Eskenazi couldn’t take being schooled any more.

  3. 3

    The story is that some metrosexual wuss with a vagina complex writing for the always hilarious SF Weekly

    On behalf of vagina-possessing gun owners everywhere, I’m officially insulted! :em07: :em05:

  4. 4
    Secondmouse growls and barks:

    Thanks, Sire, I needed that. The damn ‘nattering nabobs of negativism’ are everywhere all day, spouting their leftist bile, and I sometimes forget just how plain-ole doorstop-stupid they are. This was a great reminder.

  5. 5
    LC Xystus growls and barks:

    Coincidentally I’d just decided to call my main weapon/scary instrument “Highland assault pipes!”

  6. 6
    GamerFromJump growls and barks:

    I’m waiting for a call to ban the powerful and dreaded variable mode plasma cannon!

  7. 7
    LC Alric growls and barks:

    Yeah, gotta love that 8 gauge M90A combat shotgun…I bet I can pick one up at those gun shows that sell mortars, GPMGs, rocket launchers and land mines to Mexican drug cartels too!

  8. 8
    Mark12A growls and barks:

    LC Nicki the Resident Misanthropic Bitch @ #:

    Speaking as a vagina enthusiast of significant tenure, I apologize for Men everywhere.

  9. 9
    Emperor Misha I growls and barks:

    LC Nicki the Resident Misanthropic Bitch says:

    On behalf of vagina-possessing gun owners everywhere, I’m officially insulted!

    Sestrichka moya, there is absolutely, positively, affirmatively nothing wrong with possessing a vagina, much less with those who do, but there is something profoundly wrong with somebody who alleges to be male behaving as if he would like to possess one.
    Emperor Misha I recently posted..Epic Fail The Eleventyith Time !!!!!!1!!My Profile

  10. 10

    Emperor Misha I says:

    but there is something profoundly wrong with somebody who alleges to be male behaving as if he would like to possess one.

    Give me 15 minutes, a pair of garden clippers, a stainless steel wire brush, and a post hole digger and I’ll make him one.

  11. 11
    Bones growls and barks:

    Emporer, gonna have to call BS on your response to Nikki. I am a male and I woudl like to possess not just one, but several vaginas. I mean, really, really wanna have SEVERAL! Unfortunately, I think that my wife has a completely different opinion on this matter and I am quite certain that if I were to actually try to posess another vagina, that I would immediately have no use for what used to be male parts, or oxygen, or water, only a very deep hole in the fartherest back forty around! :em05: