Il Douche Declares Victory

The Obama administration has decided to withdraw all U.S. forces from Iraq by the end of the year after failing to reach an agreement with the Iraqi government that would have left several thousand troops there for special operations and training.

“The rest of our troops in Iraq will come home at the end of the year,” Obama said Friday at the White House. “After nearly nine years, America’s war in Iraq will be over.”

We certainly hope so, nothing would make us happier than to see Iraq emerge as a totally sovereign, peaceful democracy with no need for foreign assistance. It would be the utter vindication of all of the Bush Administration’s goals when going in there, after all.

But we suspect that the real intentions of SCOAMFOTUS’ withdrawal of our troops is to try to rescue a few points in the polls prior to 2012 by claiming that he, being the one to issue the order to withdraw, was the one who “won” the Iraqi campaign. Much like Boris Yeltsin, by being the one presiding over Russia when the order to withdraw troops from Eastern Europe, might have claimed to be the one to have “won” the Cold War.

Except Boris, not being a complete narcissistic stuttering clusterfuck of a miserable failure, never actually made that claim.

If sectarian strife or other violence should break out in Iraq once U.S. forces have left, Obama could be blamed, particularly by his conservative critics, for abandoning Iraq after nearly nine years of war before it was ready to protect itself.

Except, of course, that the MFM will never even think about blaming Teh One™ for anything and will do everything they can to bury any such criticism coming from individuals to whom “screwing Obama” doesn’t mean “having actual sex with Barry.”

Perhaps it really is time to withdraw and let Iraq stand on its own feet. We certainly hope so as we, just as the Bush administration, never wanted to have to hang around forever. That wasn’t the mission.

But what we can guarantee you at this point is that if it does turn out to be the right time, then what the MFM will never mention is that the only reason that the Stuttering Clusterfuck of a Miserable Failure would even find himself in the situation where he could issue the withdraw order is the sacrifice of hundreds of thousands of American troops and the surge designed and carried out by one General Petraeus.

The same guy who used to be called “Betray Us” in full page New York Times ads paid for by SCOAMF’s supporters.

And if it turns out to be yet another miserable failure of Barry Soetoro’s, then you can rest equally assured that the MFM will break out into unison blaming the “failed policies of the previous administration” for the clusterfuck.

As to His Imperial Majesty, it’s really simple:

Dear Iraq, we hope and pray that you will emerge as a beacon of freedom in the Middle East and that the sufferings you have gone through will not have been in vain. You truly inspired this American when you stood up to terrorism and oppression and lined up under mortar bombardment in order to, for the first time in the lives of most of you, cast a vote in a free election. You deserve for this to be a success.

Dear men and women of the United States Armed Forces, you have earned, again, our undying and eternal gratitude for the sacrifices you’ve borne for us, the courage you have displayed too many times to count under adverse conditions, the determination, loyalty and devotion to everything our great nation stands for and the example that you have set and continue to set for the entire world.

If this is to be victory, then that victory is yours and nobody else’s.

You paid the price.

The rest of us are left with a debt that we can never repay.

We are proud of you and eternally grateful to you.

We can only hope to ever prove worthy of you.

Thatisall.

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LC Gladiator
LC Gladiator

Well said boss. Well said

FrJim, Imperial Chaplain
FrJim, Imperial Chaplain

With due respect to both President Bush and President Obama, the people who actually won the fight in Iraq are these: -The 38 year old Gunny SGT I prayed with in Balad the day he rolled over an IED and lost both legs and one of his arms. -The British corporal in Basrah who saw his buddy blown to pieces… Read more »

LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech, Imperial Photographer, K.o.E.
LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech, Imperial Photographer, K.o.E.

Mission Accomplished vs Mission Abandoned.
Time will tell,,, and I don’t think it’ll take much time all.
No illusions here.

AyUaxe
AyUaxe

First, a hat tip and a hearty ditto to Fr. Jim @ 2–you are so right, it hurts. Of course, that’s not the only reason it hurts. Just thinking about the magnanimity of our armed forces, produces huge clouds of dust in my immediate vicinity–yeah, that’s it, dust hurtin’ my eyes. Gotta get some eye wash, stat. With important statements… Read more »

What a bunch of crap! SCOAMF – an acronym for President Obama popularized by child molesters. McCain and Romney blast the decision!! Have they no shame?At the same time Bush people praise it as executing the agreement made by President Bush. They can’t even agree on what this means except that Obama should get no credit. What a sad state… Read more »

LC Mike in Chi
LC Mike in Chi

UNeverKnow @5

We can only hope that someday, Bush, Cheney and their neocon brethren are brought to justice for their indiscriminate slaughter.

How’s ’bout the MB bishops that condoned the genocide of over 20 million black children as a Plan For Parenthood since the 1930’s for their discriminate slaughter, UN Ever Kow.
Scratch a lib, find a racist…

LC Gunsniper
LC Gunsniper

Emperor Misha I @ #: I dunno. This clown sounds like a LaRouchie reading from his pamphlet. They can’t even agree on what this means except that Obama should get no credit. Shit. I give jug ears all the credit in the world for starting an illegal war. I even get a kick out of the naked emperor and his… Read more »

LC Big Evil
LC Big Evil

Someday, a liberal is going to have to explain their point of view to me because basically, all I hear is a xerox machine running in the background printing pictures of someones backside.

~Big Evil

Slightly to the right of Gingis Khan
Slightly to the right of Gingis Khan

Hey, who brought the chew toy? UNeverKnow says: Like killing terrorist after terrorist Terrorist after Terrorist……. Ummm, to the best of my knowledge he hasn’t picked up a rifle and killed one. But let’s , for the moment assume you’re talking about orders he’s given as C&C. I count two. Osama and al-Awiaki, everything else was simply continuing what he… Read more »

LC BOATS
LC BOATS

I know this may make me sound like one of those smelly hippies from the 60s but I am glad to see our wonderful men and women in uniform come home from that hell hole and I wish they could be brought home from Afghanistan too. We have sacrificed to many brave Americans for an ungrateful people who within a… Read more »

LC Sir Intellectual Conservative 5th Columnist
LC Sir Intellectual Conservative 5th Columnist

UNeverKnow @ #:

I think what’s on the troll’s website itself speaks volumes, and it’s in the first paragraph:

“Not the story, the comment section. As you know I restarted my website. And I did it because I wanted to get rid of my pathetic rants of racism and spelling errors.”

Project much, troll boy? :em05:

LC Gunsniper
LC Gunsniper

LC BOATS @ #: I was in that overgrown litterbox during Desert Storm and nothing made us happier than leaving that shithole behind for good. The only nice thing I saw there was the occasional vivid sunrise and sunset. My worry is that once we have our troops home O dumb ass will start shipping them out to Uganda since… Read more »

LC SecondMouse
LC SecondMouse

I am not sure what to make of this news. One of my cousins was one of the military personnel killed in combat in Iraq, and I would like to think that the political calculus of the moment has more to do with concluding that the job is done, and less to do with a long shot attempt to save… Read more »

Draven32
Draven32

Secondmouse says:

hope you are listening, Mr. President. DO NOT screw this up.

I’ma fraid they already have. By not even leaving minmalist advisors, I expect that 20 years from now kids will be taught in school how we lost the war in Vietnam Iraq.

LC Ohio Right Wing Nut
LC Ohio Right Wing Nut

As much as I can’t stand SCOMAF, and I havn’t researched it for myself, But according to Mr. Bill on Fox last night, jugears really didn’t have a choice in the matter, because we were going to leave troops there, maybe 10,000? but the new Iraqi government wanted our soldiers tried in Iraqi courts, not tried by us if the… Read more »

FrankOK
FrankOK

UNeverKnow @ #:
I learned something today after reading this fellow’s blog – that is, being anti Communism, Liberalism, Socialism and Marxism makes me a racist.

Indeed. I was not aware of the “fact” that commies, liberals, marxists and social democrats were each individual races. Oh well …

That makes me very proud to be a racist, if that’s the definition.

LC Sir Clambake, Imperial Black Ops Technician, K.o.E.
LC Sir Clambake, Imperial Black Ops Technician, K.o.E.

I would like to think that the political calculus of the moment has more to do with concluding that the job is done, and less to do with a long shot attempt to save Obama’s hide next November. Unfortunately, I am old enough to know better. Glad to see you actually do know better. It is ALWAYS all about him.… Read more »

LC Sir Intellectual Conservative 5th Columnist
LC Sir Intellectual Conservative 5th Columnist

LC cmblake6, Imperial Black Ops Technician @ #:

Lets just hope he doesnt plan a Gotterdammerung on his way out. I think that may be where the three person rule kicks in. Those familiar with strategic planning will know what I am referring to.

Radical Redneck
Radical Redneck

UNeverKnow @ #:

Hey SoulStraw, one of the best things about Ugabe’s annihilating defeat next year is we’ll again have a First Lady who walks on her hind legs! :em07:

Jaybear, Colonel of Imperial Ancient Artillery
Jaybear, Colonel of Imperial Ancient Artillery

LC cmblake6, Imperial Black Ops Technician says:

Moochelle will play the part of Eva Braun.

I thought she was going to play the Elefant…….

look it up

LC Gunsniper
LC Gunsniper

Nope.

The First Gargoyle will play herself.

LC SecondMouse
LC SecondMouse

LC Sir Intellectual Conservative 5th Columnist says: LC cmblake6, Imperial Black Ops Technician @ #: Lets just hope he doesnt plan a Gotterdammerung on his way out. I think that may be where the three person rule kicks in. Those familiar with strategic planning will know what I am referring to. Right. He has already Gotterdammerung-ed up the economy pretty… Read more »

LC Gunsniper
LC Gunsniper

Three cheers for jugears, spreading liberty and democracy for all. :em07:

LC Gladiator
LC Gladiator

I hope everyone is prepared for the Kurds to be thrown to the wolves with Turkey and Iran each carving out a slice of Iraq while the Shiites and Sunnis battle. Little Assad and Hezbollah running Syria and Lebanon. AQ running wild in Yemen. Egypt and Libya going Islamist. Good work, Hussein! Only a lapdog media will stand between reporting… Read more »