Great Moments in Gun Fearing Wussy Stupidity

(H/t LC & IB Bill Quick).

This was a different kind of gun buyback program.

The guns being bought back from the streets weren’t 9 mm handguns or Glocks. Instead, they were Nerf guns or toy pistols.

This is where we would like very much to be able to insert a facepalm of truly epic proportions.

The idea was simple: Don’t let kids get used to firing weapons, even if they’re toys.

Brilliant! Only that way can you be absolutely, abundantly, perfectly sure that, should they ever be threatened by a goblin scumbag with a real gun, they will have absolutely no fucking clue about how to defend themselves, even if there is a gun of their own nearby.

The organizers of this singularity of stoopid are like the flipping OSHA for burglars, rapists and murderers.

“It makes them too comfortable, holding that gun,” said Leonard Lane, president of Fathers Armed Together to Help, Educate, Restore and Save. “Then there’s no fear holding the real gun when they get older. We want to put that fear back into our children, teaching them what guns can do, how they affect their community.”

“We want to instill an irrational fear of an inanimate object, a tool, in our young impressionable children, a life long neurosis that they can cherish and nurture forever.”

Because only that way can Teh Children™ learn that it is a Bad Thing™ to Murder Thy Neighbor.

Teaching the kids to be responsible citizens respectful of life, law-abiding citizens both willing and able to protect themselves and other innocents from scumsucking goblins would just be too damn complex, after all.

And just as you think that Lane and his fellow GFW morons can’t get any more dense, they collapse on themselves and start sporting their own gravitational field of cretinous cluefuckedness:

So what will the FATHERS group do with the 100 or so toy guns?

“We plan on burying them in the next six months,” Lane said. “We’re going to get a coffin and put the guns in the coffin, and we’re going to close that coffin and pray.

“It’s symbolic — burying the guns that have been burying us.”

We’re sure all of the souls of the deceased, brutally cut down in their prime by Nerf guns, will appreciate the prayers.

Not to mention the future generation of victims reduced to cowering in helpless terror while a goblin prepares to send them to the afterlife and, of course, the hordes of therapists who will be making a cozy living off of treating your abused kids for their phobias.

Morons.

Thatisall.

45 comments

  1. 1
    Igor, Imperial Booby growls and barks:

    I’m sure they’re going for the Nerf knives next, especially in Baaaahston…

    These people have been on too many recreational pharmaceuticals.

  2. 2
    ZeektheCruel growls and barks:

    Another triumph of symbolism over substance.

    I wonder if any of these idiots would ponder why it was 20 or 30 years ago every boy played with toy guns and violence was much lower than it is today? Ya don’t figure the causes may be cultural? Ya don’t figure that when you let your offspring run around like a bunch of rutting animals and view teaching ethics and morality as an overly judgmental burden for the little shits that you may be setting yourselves up with a problem on down the road?

    These jerk offs latch on to the symbolic because the substance would be harder to do. Stemming the tide of shit that passes for modern culture would be too tough. So, they punt.

  3. 3
    LC HJ Caveman82952 growls and barks:

    What a collection of assholes!!!!!!!!!!!!! :em05:
    Cars kill more people than guns, they going to teach them to fear cars too?
    Fucking fools, living in a fools paradise.
    Yeah Kiddies, understand your dads are a bunch of cowardly wusses! :em07:
    These idiots are the ones that should be in coffins……for how many innocent people have they gotten killed?

  4. 4

    All excellent points, but even beyond training them to be helpless sheep when they grow up, by making guns completely taboo they are also setting them up for a tragic accident if they ever find a real gun. Like I always tell my students, you need to EDUCATE yer kids about guns, rather than pretend they don’t exist. Everyone has a stove in their home, do they pretend it doesn’t exist and never tell their kid what will happen if they touch a hot burner? OK, well maybe some of these idiots do. If you lock the gun away and think the kid will never find it, think back to yer daddy’s Playboys. No body EVER found those, did they?

    Yup, just raising a bunch of victims, either of a goblin or themselves. “Fathers” my ass.
    LC 0311 Sir Crunchie I.M.H., K.o.E. recently posted..Great Moments in Gun Fearing Wussy StupidityMy Profile

  5. 5

    If their strategy ends up where the dead crabs go,,they can come see me for a headstone
    LC Cheapshot911, Dept. of Redneck Tech recently posted..

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  6. 6

    Igor, Imperial Booby says:

    These people have been on too many recreational pharmaceuticals.

    And, it would appear, need to consume roughly 5-10 times greater a quantity.
    ZeektheCruel says:

    when you let your offspring run around like a bunch of rutting animals and view teaching ethics and morality as an overly judgmental burden for the little shits that you may be setting yourselves up with a problem on down the road?

    Gosh! You may have something there! I’m thinking not to warn them, because Darwin WAS correct to an extent. Stupid tends to die out.

    Cave @ 3 and Crunchie @ 4, I just don’t know which part to clip from either of yours. Let me just use # 2, Darwin.
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  7. 7
    Nurgen growls and barks:

    At least they won’t father any more children, right? I mean, once a male is gelded there’s no more offspring.

  8. 8
    MasterGuns Imperial Swampmaster growls and barks:

    Gawd……too many thoughts concerning lunacy of pseudo fathers.

    I was raised in a house full of guns……..I got my ass warmed for even thinking about dad’s guns as a kid.

    I was given my 1st gun when I was 8…..a 410 single I still have.

    I was allowed to carry a rifle deer hunting for the 1st time when I was 13………a Mk1#4 that I still have. I killed my 1st deer when I was 14.

    When I was in high school back in the dark ages, in hunting season damn near every boy and a lot of the girls had a gun and ammo in their lockers so we could go hunting after school. We got in fights and such but we never shot each other.

    I would suggest the pseudo fathers attempt to teach the damn kids proper behavior and not try to raise a herd of wusses.

    My son in law was a city kid who had never fired a weapon until he met me. He has changed and has all the vermin extermination devices that a home should have. Both of my oldest grandaughters have been presented with a handgun from “gramps”.

    Guns are dangerous……we all know that. So are chainsaws, axes, knives, hammers, fire, screwdrivers etc etc.

    So teach your spawn to use a weapon RESPONSIBLY! A new concept that has worked for thousands of years.

    I can just picture the Romans taking toy swords away from the little ones………yeah….right.

    This idea is so stupid that it’s hard for me to even fathom the depths it has reached. I would rather be sterile than have a kid that would put up with this lunacy.

    Once upon a time when the world was young we actually raised our children to be men and women. It is sad that we no longer do.

    Semper Fi

  9. 9
    LC HJ Caveman82952 growls and barks:

    The saddest thing is these kids will all be victims, either of a mind-set or an actual crime. And yes, folks get hurt or dead…but if you are defenseless, it will be you.
    If one of these paternal castratos ever had a gun pulled on him…as I have, they might change their attitudes. Or better yet, have their loved ones harmed brutally while they were forced to watch. It has happened.
    Would I feel sympathetic?
    Would they?
    The idea of my wife or daughter being brutally raped and/or murdered is why I taught my wife how to shoot a .45, then bought her one. The .357 she muscled outta’ me.
    She did just fine with the twelve bore too. Straight down range and a target disappeared.
    I told her if she was ever attacked….”fire and maintain, fill that bastard full of lead!”
    I would if she didn’t.
    One of the reasons I so despise these people, holding them in abject contempt, is because they would prefer you or your loved one be a victim, rather than defend yourself.
    And for that I hate their guts.

  10. 10
    LC Gunsniper growls and barks:

    “We plan on burying them in the next six months,” Lane said. “We’re going to get a coffin and put the guns in the coffin, and we’re going to close that coffin and pray.

    Pray for intelligence and sanity you dipshit.

  11. 11
    LC Draco growls and barks:

    :em03:

    This idea is so stupid it makes even me scratch my head.
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  12. 12
    LC Light29ID growls and barks:

    All just part of the Socialist/Marxist agenda to take over the country by making the people “useful idiots”

  13. 13

    From the article;

    So kids such as Tarence Callaham, 14, a Buffalo ninth-grader, brought in his green and orange Nerf gun. …“I learned that you shouldn’t have guns and stuff,” Tarence said. “It gives kids an education not to play with bad things.”

    Either this dipshit played the useful idiots for a free slice of pizza, or he is symptomatic of the colossal stupidity exhibited by the “adults”, and stuff.

    “Not to play with bad things”. Remember that during your next 45 minute long shower ya dumb ass. And stuff.
    LC 0311 Sir Crunchie I.M.H., K.o.E. recently posted..Great Moments in Gun Fearing Wussy StupidityMy Profile

  14. 14
    LC Grammar Czar, G.L.O.R. growls and barks:

    So, do nerf guns kill nerf people? What are those fathers going to do when their sons use their index fingers as a gun (and what kid hasn’t done that), cut off their fingers?

  15. 15
    americanexpat growls and barks:

    The guns being bought back from the streets weren’t 9 mm handguns or Glocks.

    Thus spake the repository of journalistic firearms knowledge. Hey, GFW, a Glock is often a 9mm handgun. Not always, but Glock makes a lot of them chambered for the old 9mm Parabellum, Models 17, 19, 26, all of which I have fired frequently, and possibly others (which I have not). A quick Google search would have provided plenty of relevant info on Glock firearms, but I guess the GFW journo couldn’t be bothered.

    Similar to MasterGuns, I attended college in a part of the U.S. where November 15 (first day of firearms deer season) was honored as a quasi-religious holiday (as was 1 April, the first day of trout/steelhead season). We had plenty of guns on campus, and I don’t recall anyone–anyone–ever shooting anyone else or even having an ND. Just didn’t happen.

    I once dated a squishy-headed leftist (for reasons involving a waterbed that were totally unrelated to her silly-ass politics, but I digress) who felt that kids shouldn’t even be shown pictures of guns, much less play with toy guns. This was in the early 1980s, so this bullshit has been around for a while.

  16. 16
    MarineVet1995 growls and barks:

    I had to read the article twice, looking for the “Onion” tag… or failing that checking the date to make sure someone didn’t put an April 1st story out at the wrong time….

    First of all, everyone here has hit all the high points, just let me add that mine were taught to respect guns from an early age, taught to come get an adult if they saw one unattended, and when old enough, how to clear, load and shoot properly. Both are now over 18 and have yet to sh** themselves at the sight of a (dread, eeeevil) gun.

    Second, if taking away a nerf gun because it looks somewhat like a real gun is the aim here, does anyone know where I can get a, say 9mm in green and yellow with a big fucking tank for bullets on top? Maybe with multiple barrels, that shoots around corners, cause that would be really really cool!

  17. 17
    LC Gladiator growls and barks:

    Fathers Armed Together to Help, Educate, Restore and Save. “

    Wrong acronym…should be Fathers Armed – Restore (and)to Save.

    F.A.R.T.S

  18. 18

    MarineVet1995 says:

    does anyone know where I can get a, say 9mm in green and yellow with a big fucking tank for bullets on top? Maybe with multiple barrels, that shoots around corners, cause that would be really really cool!

    Well Devil Dog, it ain’t green, only has one barrel, and no Hollywood magazine, but it does shoot around corners. :em01:
    LC 0311 Sir Crunchie I.M.H., K.o.E. recently posted..Great Moments in Gun Fearing Wussy StupidityMy Profile

  19. 19
    BoynSea growls and barks:

    a life long neurosis that they can cherish and nurture forever.

    WTF? That right there is some sick shit.

  20. 20
    BoynSea growls and barks:

    Crap. What I meant was, you are right. Brainwashing your own kids into neurosis.

  21. 21

    BoynSea @ #:
    That’s alright BoynSea, we caught yer meaning. We’s gots us sum edmucashun. :em01: Well, were smarter than these dumb-asses anyway.
    LC 0311 Sir Crunchie I.M.H., K.o.E. recently posted..Great Moments in Gun Fearing Wussy StupidityMy Profile

  22. 22
    Draven32 growls and barks:

    ZeektheCruel says:

    I wonder if any of these idiots would ponder why it was 20 or 30 years ago every boy played with toy guns and violence was much lower than it is today?

    20 years ago would be 1991.

    Gun violence peaked in 1993 so it would be safe to say that violence in 1991 was higher than it is today.

  23. 23
    LC Darth Scoundrel growls and barks:

    My 12 year old loves the Saiga, and I’m converting it back to the AK trigger group so it will be a real live AK clone so the GFW’s can really have a fit.
    :em06:
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  24. 24
    Secondmouse growls and barks:

    LC Gladiator says:

    Fathers Armed Together to Help, Educate, Restore and Save. “
    Wrong acronym…should be Fathers Armed – Restore (and)to Save.
    F.A.R.T.S

    …or Fathers Armed Together to Help, Educate, Appease, Delude and Save – F.A.T.H.E.A.D.S.

  25. 25

    shhhhhhhhh……..not so loud you guys. If this is what the anti-gun lobby is going to do, then get out of the way and let ‘em do it.

    Burying nerf guns? Sounds fine to me, it keeps them busy, gives them the self affirmation that they so crave, and keeps them away from my M1.

  26. 26
    Mattexian growls and barks:

    LC Grammar Czar, G.L.O.R. @ #:
    What are those fathers going to do when their sons use their index fingers as a gun (and what kid hasn’t done that), cut off their fingers?

    That’s what I was wondering too. Geeze Louise, how many times did we run around the playground, holding up a finger and thumb while shouting “BANG!” playing cowboys and indians evil capitalist oppressors and peaceful First Nations or cops and robbers more evil capitalist oppressors and misunderstood disadvantaged yutes?
    Mattexian recently posted..If you give a mouse an AKMy Profile

  27. 27
    LC Old Dog growls and barks:

    One question, who even went to school on the first day of deer season? Hell, of course my parents covered me, they were in the blinds on either side!

    :em05:
    LC Old Dog recently posted..It Takes a Fed or a Red!My Profile

  28. 28
    VonZorch Imperial Researcher growls and barks:

    MarineVet1995 says:

    does anyone know where I can get a, say 9mm in green and yellow with a big fucking tank for bullets on top?

    Probably not green and yellow but a Calico M900 is 9mm and has a big fucking tank of (50 or 100) bullets on top.
    and you could always paint it if color was that important

  29. 29
    Slightly to the right of Gingis Khan growls and barks:

    LC Old Dog says:

    One question, who even went to school on the first day of deer season? Hell, of course my parents covered me, they were in the blinds on either side!

    The schools around here just gave up, tacked two days onto Thanksgiving break and called it an autumn holiday. :em05:

  30. 30
    Bones growls and barks:

    I am truly at a loss as to what to say, and that’s damn hard to do. Most everything has been covered by those above. We went to school and carried KNIVES in our pockets, had GUNS in our vehicles (except when I rode to motorcycle) and NO ONE EVER got hurt. Of course, there were many “sick” days during dove, duck, turkey, squirrel, deer, etc. season, but if ya gave a pound or two of deer sausage to the front office at school, those days magically disappeared and you never missed ‘em. We didn’t have shootings on the street or anywhere near the violence back then because everyone knew that if it came to that level, you were going to the chair (sparky) if it wasn’t self defence. My kids were raised around guns. The eldest has done 2 tours if affuckistan and has several under his belt, the younger has taken lots of deer. Seems like normal men to me. My grandson will get my first gun in about two or three years (just turned 5 and wants it NOW!). I will not be responsible for raising any pussies. Even my eldest daughter can put 10 outa 10 on target with a 308 at 250 yrds. She still needs practice w/the 45 though, only 8 outa 10 at 25 yrds.

  31. 31
    MikeG growls and barks:

    My kids never had toy guns. My reasons are a bit different than you might think. I had toy guns when I was a kid. Ran around the house and yard going, “Bang! Bang!” and all of that. To date, I have not yet fired a gun at another living creature. Not even hunting. Don’t have anything against those who hunt, I just don’t.

    The wife and I have been running a daycare in our house for the last 16 years or so. No guns allowed here. The only reason is that I don’t want 12 kids running around making shooting noises in my house. It would drive me freaking insane!

    I do have real guns in the house. My kids know where they are and how to use them responsibly. (Not the daycare kids, they don’t even know I have guns, and it will stay that way.)

  32. 32
    ZeektheCruel growls and barks:

    Draven32 @ #:
    Damnation…I keep forgetting I’m old.

    I was thinking 70′s. So, 30 or 40 years ago.

  33. 33
    Igor, Imperial Booby growls and barks:

    Zeek, I live in the Great White North, and in HS we had lotsa trucks parked in the lot with rifle racks with real rifles in ‘em. Yep, during hunting season there were mysterious illness sweeping the (mostly) guys for a day or two…

    Not many women hunters in the 60′s and 70′s (I graduated HS in ’71), but those that I knew (all two of ‘em) could SHOOT. They got a deer every season.

  34. 34
    LC HJ Caveman82952 growls and barks:

    Off topic, folks, but one of our own, Dragoness, is in surgery right for for her affliction. I’m saying a prayer or three for her………………..

  35. 35
    ZeektheCruel growls and barks:

    Igor, Imperial Booby @ #:
    Yep. I’ve heard the same story from my dad. He grew up on a dairy farm in northern Indiana and the beginning of deer season meant the guys would come into school after being out hunting in the morning. They would come in with a 12 gauge and a pocket full of slugs and nobody thought a thing about it. When they got out in the afternoon they were back out in the field looking to bust a cap in Bambi’s ass.

  36. 36
    Cricket growls and barks:

    :em05: “They” will pry my son’s Nerf guns out of his cold, dead hands. He has an arsenal. I routinely purchase darts. I have to keep him from painting them black though. Some of them have a realistic profile, which is why they are made in neon-puke colors. Will we stop getting them after reading that? No way. He ought to read about how whole families play paintball and do air soft scenarios. What a complete moron. It is too late to do something about him, as he has tainted the gene pool. I can just see him trying to negotiate/appease a perp and getting gunned down for it.

  37. 37
    Cricket growls and barks:

    Otay: Nerf guns lead to real guns and sociopathic behavior. Based on what? Where is the empirical evidence to show this connection?

  38. 38
    BigDogg growls and barks:

    LC 0311 Sir Crunchie I.M.H., K.o.E. says:

    Remember that during your next 45 minute long shower ya dumb ass. And stuff.
    LC 0311 Sir Crunchie I.M.H., K.o.E. recently posted..Great Moments in Gun Fearing Wussy Stupidity

    :em05:

    I say let these pacifist fuckwads have their feel-good rituals, and train their inferior offspring the same way … all the better to thin them out when TSHTF.

  39. 39
    MarineVet1995 growls and barks:

    VonZorch Imperial Researcher @ #:
    Alright… I bet I can doctor that up to look like a NERF gun… or maybe paint it pink and put “Hello Kitty” stickers on it… :em05:

    Sheeeesh…. I’m still shakin my head over the whole thing. I thought I had seen stupid, self-deluded ppl before… but…

  40. 40

    As long as stupidity generates cash, expect investors..
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  41. 41
    Radical Redneck growls and barks:

    Not content to merely posting anacepelically insane blather…

    “Dick Cheney as “Giant Killer” would explain a lot! the Giant Killer who needed 9/11 to go down smoothly to get an illegal war in Iraq (in a country that had nothing to do with 9/11!) for Halliburton is Dick Cheney!!!!”

    Now KKKayinsane is posting intensely stupid, IQ robbing images. :shock: :em04:

  42. 42
    SicSemperTyrannus growls and barks:

    Ironic thought – this is weapons grade stupidity on display

  43. 43
    Draven32 growls and barks:

    Cricket says:

    Otay: Nerf guns lead to real guns and sociopathic behavior. Based on what? Where is the empirical evidence to show this connection?

    They probably can cite several ‘studies’ that were paid for funded by The Joyce Foundation.

  44. 44
    LC Grammar Czar, G.L.O.R. growls and barks:

    My dad, a member of the “greatest generation,” said that when he was in HS, they had a gun club, and they all posed proudly with their guns for the yearbook. Try doing that today…

  45. 45

    As the Alpha Male John Wayne said :

    Life is hard. It’s even harder when you’re stupid.

    Makes you wonder who wears the panties in those wusses houses.