Liberal Idiots Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered by Obvious Historical Reference

Which is what happens, we suppose, when you concentrate the entirety of your scholastic pursuits on such subjects as gender studies, basket weaving, social justice and comparative folk dancing.

Congressman and possible senator Allen West lives in his own serene and strange reality where, no doubt, his recent response to a local Islamic group makes perfect sense.

He does indeed. It’s called The Real World™, in which simple, basic historical references are immediately obvious to anybody with an IQ higher than their shoe size.

In early August, the Council on American-Islamic Relations (CAIR) sent a 679-word letter to West urging him to cut ties with “anti-Islamic extremists.. CAIR singled out Bridgette Gabriel, Pamela Geller, Robert Spencer, and Rev. Neil Dozier as Muslim-haters with whom West has shared stages.

“Muslims protect and serve our great country and are afforded equal protection under law,” the letter read. “We shouldn’t have to defend our rights to worship freely or participate in the governing of our society.”

That’s all the article quotes out of the 679 words, but we’re sure you fine LCs can easily fill in the rest of that standard threat mail from the lovable huggy-bears of CAIR.

It’s interesting that they bleat about how muslims “shouldn’t have to defend their rights to worship freely or participate in the governing of our society” when they, at the same time, feel it quite appropriate for them to insist that Colonel West waive his right to freedom of association. Interesting as in “the irony here is so bloody dense it has its own gravitational field.”

Also, did we miss the point where islam became illegal?

But we still haven’t gotten to the fun part where Colonel West utterly baffles, bamboozles and bewilders the liberidiots, so let’s hurry on.

Soon afterward, CAIR received the following letter, which was first reported by CBS4. The Muslim group sent us a copy, which we’ve embedded below. We believe it might be the dumbest thing ever written on congressional stationery.

Good thing you didn’t write your article on congressional stationery then, seeing as how Colonel West would have immediately been beaten by you for that record.

What did he write that was so utterly incomprehensible to a bunch of liberidiotarian journaljizzmers?

Dear Mr. Hamze and Mr. Shibly,

I am writing to you with regard your recent letter:


Steadfast and loyal,

Allen B. West
Member of Congress

Insert cheering here. Well, unless you don’t get the reference either, in which case we’ll be happy to send you to remedial history classes courtesy of LC 0311 Sir Crunchie I.M.H., K.o.E.. It shouldn’t take very long to remedy your problem, and we promise you that it will be mostly painless.

Executive director Nezar Hamze tells Riptide he’s befuddled: “Obviously, I was expecting a little more from an elected official. I don’t know if he was calling me nuts or calling my request nuts or what.”

Or even if he were derogatorily commenting upon the size of your nuts.

“All of the above”, would seem an adequate answer to your incredibly stupid question.

(West’s spokesperson has yet to explain to New Times what the congressman meant.)

Most likely because he’s got better things to do than to make up for the staff of the New Times spending all of second grade sniffing glue and trading crack.

Hamze doesn’t think he’ll write West back. “How can I respond to this?”

Follow the historical precedent of the answer and go on to utter defeat and destruction. Please.

Fortunately for the Miami New Times and their cluefucked staff, they have a comments section, so later on in the article we have this:

Update: Several glorious patriots have suggested below (after secretly reading The Daily Kos, we bet)

At which point we had to pause for another bout of hysterical laughter. We cordially invite anybody thusly inclined to go find a “glorious patriot” at the Daily Kotz, but we warn you that it will be akin to finding a righteous man in Sodom or Gomorrah. Oops. Another obscure reference. Somebody please explain it to the New Miami Times, should one of them chance to come by. Anyway, carrying on:

that West was channeling Gen. Anthony McAuliffe’s response to Nazi demands that he surrender.

Is that so? Well clear the bloody front page, why don’t you? Somebody actually opened a history book or watched Band of Brothers, the latter being highly unlikely since it wasn’t aired on MSNBC. But if you think Teh Stoopid™ ends here, you’re wrong.

So… an American-Islamic advocacy group? Nazis?

Still the dumbest thing we’ve ever seen on Congressional stationary.

Now far be it from us to suggest that Colonel West was comparing an unindicted islamic terrorist front organization to Nazis, it’s more likely that he was just seeing another bunch of blustering fools issuing ridiculous demands that no man of honor could ever accept and saw the obvious parallel, but if you really must go down that road, let’s enlighten you a bit vis-a-vis muslim ties to Nazism.

Here’s everybody’s favorite Austrian madman meeting with the Mufti of Jerusalem

Classic muslim blood libel, showing Ariel Sharon holding a goblet labeled “The Palestinian Children’s Blood”

Selections from a muslim bookstore.

Beginning to see the picture? And we haven’t even mentioned the koran-mandated “solution” to people not willing to submit to their sick, perverted ideology, but since it’s a quick one we’ll include it for extra credit: “Kill Them All™.”

Color us paranoid, but we’re fairly certain that if Republicans started cozying up to the leadership of StormFront, White Pride and Aryan Nation, drawing cartoons depicting Jews drinking the blood of white children and started selling copies of Mein Kampf at CPAC like they were going out of style, you twaddling tumblefucks at Miami New Times wouldn’t have the slightest problem seeing the parallels and calling us all Nazis.

Heck, you call us that every time we criticize anything that Ear Leader says.

Consider yourselves educated, although we’re absolutely certain that it won’t keep you from sticking your heads up your arses in the future, keeping us all entertained.



  1. 1
    LC Gunsniper growls and barks:

    Executive director Nezar Hamze tells Riptide he’s befuddled: “Obviously, I was expecting a little more from an elected official. I don’t know if he was calling me nuts or calling my request nuts or what.”

    Heinrich Freiherr von Lüttwitz had a similar reaction.

    Suck it, goatfucker.

  2. 2

    :em05: :em05: :em05: :em05: :em05:

    Colonel West …

    PLEASE run for President !!!!!!

  3. 3
    Terrapod growls and barks:

    My repect and appreciation for Col (r) West just went up 20 notches! Go get em and I think a Perry/West ticket may be looking pretty good too!

  4. 4
    bruce growls and barks:

    the germans learned mass murder from the ragheads as there were germans in turkey observing the armenian massacre,they never lifted a finger to stop it.nazi germans encouraged ragheads to kill jews.there is nothing about pisslam that is not evil or inhumane and it should be out lawed along with communism in our country.

  5. 5

    Remember that little snippet about pisslam up in the post? Hey, hey! You might find this article a worthwhile read! I found it quite interesting.

  6. 6

    man on man, I just keep liking Col West more and more…..

    Maybe he should have quoted Stonewall Jackson when he said “Kill them, kill them all”

    at least that’s language those medieval beasts would understand.

  7. 7
    LC Draco growls and barks:

    Nothing says, “FUCK YOU!!”, like a simple and sweet response!!!

  8. 8
    Radical Redneck growls and barks:

    KKKayinsane screaming the recent attack in Israel was a false flag human sacrifice so the Jews can kill brown people

    KayInMaine says: August 20, 2011 at 9:08 AM the attack was orchestrated through Glenn Beck & Netanyahu, because Glenn Beck started his radio program the day of this attack with the story and screaming, “Why is the media not talking about this!!!”, implying that he’s the only one who cares about the Jews to garner sympathy for a government that commits atrocities against the brown Palestinians (occupying THEIR land!) while being backed by Wall Builders which is owned by anti-Semites!

    The Egyptians are not happy with Israel right now and if they retaliate, who will be blamed? Well, the Egyptians of course! Just like American republicans, the Israeli government can never take the blame and will make sure everyone else is to blame. See? *spit!*

    :em05: :em05:

  9. 9
    LC Fei Long growls and barks:

    Still the dumbest thing we’ve ever seen on Congressional stationary.

    Ohh, I can think of dumber things Congress has sat on their butts about!

  10. 10
    The Irish Dragoness growls and barks:

    Wow! Love West’s response! :em01:

  11. 11
    Grammar Czar growls and barks:

    Still the dumbest thing we’ve ever seen on Congressional stationary[sic].

    Perhaps he should learn to spell before he calls someone else dumb.

  12. 12
    lc purple raider growls and barks:

    Still the dumbest thing we’ve ever seen on Congressional stationary.

    Weren’t they reading any congressional letters from Demonrats?

  13. 13
    LC Xystus growls and barks:

    Some Islamic(?) Dummkopf didn’t even get the NSDAP swastika right. Schwarz, nicht rot, Schweinhund!

  14. 14
    LC Sir Rurik, K.o.E. growls and barks:

    Radical Redneck @ 8#:

    Warning. If she is accusing the Israelis of false flag provocationsm, that is a certain alert that her president Ruler is fixing to stage another false flag gambit. Several recent incidents bear the appearance of possible false flaggers, including Gunwalker and the Loughner-Giffords shooting.

  15. 15
    LC Staci GBOR growls and barks:

    Miami New Times is a crap paper aimed at the drunk and drugged out folks down there. Complete trash. The classified is the best part….anything from manscaping for transvestites to employment offerings from nude sushi bars for 300 lb plus women to be served on.

  16. 16

    LC Staci GBOR @ #:

    That’s called a Roman Feast. The only problem is the raisins you find in the gluttial cleft might not actually be raisins. :em06: