Numbed by Pain

I don’t even know how to begin this, so I’ll just ramble on.

I just learned from Bill that my old friend, Kim, lost his wife Connie.

Now, to say that I “knew” Connie and Kim would be the most horrid understatement that I ever uttered.

Way back when I could barely type a post, much less knew what the hell HTML was, they were the ones who stumbled across me and invited me to a shindig at their house. That’s where I met Rachel Lucas, Bill Whittle before he was more than a commenter on Rachel’s blog, and so many more people who will always be with me, people who forever changed my life and who I am.

But Connie in particular… She was the one who saw something in me that I didn’t even realize I had, she was the one who hauled me out of my comfort zone and showed me just what I had in me.

To say that she merely changed the trajectory of my life would be an insult.

I can’t even begin to say how much she and Kim meant to me and who I am today, and to learn that she’s no longer among us just hurts. Bad. Not as bad as I know that it hurts Kim, because I never saw a couple who were more dedicated to each other than they. But it hurts still.

Connie, you changed my life, and changed it for the better. With your infinite curiosity, you optimism, everything that was you, you left behind something, something for which I’ll always be grateful. Your leaving us leaves a hole in this world, but you didn’t just leave. You left this world a better place than it was when you found it. If I could only hope to do that myself.

And Kim, if you read this, let me know. Let me know so I can be there for you in any way I can. If you still have my number, call. If you have my email addy, write. I lost all of that info when my old hard drive crashed (taught me how to do backups), and if all else fails, I think I still know the way to your place and I’ll find it.

G-d bless.

Kim has a fundraiser going here if you have a few shekels. I don’t have much, but I’ve sent what I have. Not because it softens the blow, I can’t even imagine, but, well, because I don’t know what else to do right now.

And I have to do something.

I miss you already, Connie, but I know that I’ll see you again.

Keep a chair empty for me and let me have it. Just like you always did.



  1. 1
    LibraryGryffon growls and barks:

    I’ll add Connie, Kim, and their children to my prayers.

    Damn, but that list is getting too long.

  2. 2
    Farmor, LC, GLOR and Imperial Mother growls and barks:

    I’m so sorry to hear that – I know, what they did for you and meant for you my son.It hurts. Give my regards and my prayers to Kim, if you get in touch with him.

    Love and all my thoughts

    Your mom

  3. 3
    Ironbear growls and barks:

    Yeah, I was sorry to hear that. I read the news over at InstaPundit before someone dropped it in Bill’s O/T thread.

    Rough. I hope Kim makes it through.

  4. 4
    Tallulah growls and barks:

    14 Therefore sent he thither horses, and chariots, and a great host: and they came by night, and compassed the city about.

    15 And when the servant of the man of God was risen early, and gone forth, behold, an host compassed the city both with horses and chariots. And his servant said unto him, Alas, my master! how shall we do?

    16 And he answered, Fear not: for they that be with us are more than they that be with them.

    17 And Elisha prayed, and said, Lord, I pray thee, open his eyes, that he may see. And the Lord opened the eyes of the young man; and he saw: and, behold, the mountain was full of horses and chariots of fire round about Elisha.

  5. 5
    lc purple raider growls and barks:

    Prayers sent!

  6. 6
    Delftsman3 growls and barks:

    Damn, Kim and Connie and meant a great deal when I had first started blogging. They were always the second blog (after the Rott, of course) They were both right in what a sane person should strive to.

  7. 7
    Delftsman3 growls and barks:

    :em06: And it probably isn’t the right time or place to tell, but I was greatly hit yesterday; I’m still in shock I believe. My father died yesterday morning, Yes he was 86, so it wasn’t really to be hard to believe, but…even though we all know that in the future our parents will die, we never really believe it until before that time comes… now all three of the most important people in my life is now through the Veil.