Muslim Chimp in Iran Pounds Chest, Attempts to Find Testicles

White House press secretary Sean Spicer reacted Tuesday to a statement from Iran’s Ayatollah Khamenei, who said that Donald Trump “showed the real face of the United States,” accusing him of putting a five-year-old in handcuffs.

…whereas we all know that, under the far superior islamic shariah law, the correct treatment of 5 year olds is to rip their pants off and anally rape them to death. Such a superior culture.

“I think Iran is kidding itself if they don’t think there’s a new president in town,” Spicer replied when asked about the Ayatollah’s comments in the White House press briefing.

We hope to see them find out soon. A couple of sudden sunrises in the middle of the night ought to wake them right the fuck up.



  1. 1
    Terrapod growls and barks:

    Wonder where the intelligent pebbles program is at nowadays? A few well aimed rocks from above hitting key locations in Iran and Saudi may change the tune after all it is gods will when shit happens in that part of the world. Inshalla!

  2. 2
    LCBrendan growls and barks:

    Since the Iranian guy has bought what was fake news

    You could say “Ayatollah ya so…” :em08: :em01: :em05:

  3. 3
    Retired Spook growls and barks:

    The day when I am concerned about what some illiterate camel-humper thinks about ANYTHING is the day they’ll be putting me under the sod. I hope he sees what happening, and gets his shit together, but I’m not holding my breath, because I don’t look good in that shade of blue.

  4. 4
    FrJim, Imperial Chaplain growls and barks:

    “We hope to see them find out soon. A couple of sudden sunrises in the middle of the night ought to wake them right the fuck up.”

    Very bright sunrises. Accompanied by loud booms, heat, and shock waves…


  5. 5
    redc1c4 growls and barks:

    be a damn shame if a series of unexplained explosions in the middle of the night took out IRG senior leadershit, various transmitters, a few travel choke points, all at one time.

    what’s the point of having the B-2 if we don’t put it to w*rk?

    SecDef Mattis needs to come up with a new & improved Operation Praying Mantis II, as well.

    draw their “navy” out, then sink them all, and go after anything left in harbor.

    F them. it was your idea to run with the big dog. :em07:

  6. 6
    LCBrendan growls and barks:

    Just a brief note.

    The 9th Circuit Court upheld the stay. Neither a surprise nor unexpected, and this will, as it was always bound to be, headed for the Supreme Court. No outrage or anger…this was expected and having read their decision, I am certain this will be amongst the 85 plus percent of decisions the appeals court have made that will be reversed.

    So no new post on this…this was more or less inevitable.

  7. 7
    L.O.R. Ankle biter growls and barks:

    There’s a reason some call them the 9th circus. Might be a term used here or I might have read it somewhere else.

  8. 8
    VonZorch Imperial Researcher growls and barks:

    L.O.R. Ankle biter @ #:8
    Both doubtless. I’ve used it here in comments from time to time, but I got it from somewhere else, can’t remember where.

  9. 9
    LCBrendan growls and barks:

    Oh and btw another small fact, Obama didnt like the USSC because on 44 occasions, he lost.

  10. 10
    redc1c4 growls and barks:

    no idea how i made a dup comment…


    [Edit: Fixed for you and Misha is aware of the bug. – Brendan]