And the Daily Schadenboner Update

Just when we thought that the turgid monster would finally, FINALLY take a rest and allow us to wear something other than a fucking sari, looking like a Ringling, Barnum and Bailey big top, shit like this pops up in the news:

As outgoing President Barack Obama plans to head off on vacation when he vacates the White House next week, his staffers and appointees are struggling to find work in Washington, D.C.

Ouch! The damn thing just poked a hole. In the CEILING!!!

Welcome to the real world, as experienced by the rest of us during your cum-dribbling fucktard of a Prozi sugar daddy’s reign of error. It’s… FUNEMPLOYMENT. We hope you starve to death. But not until you’ve been stricken from the unemployment rolls because you’ve been out of a job for so long that you’ve given up finding one and thus don’t count as “unemployed” any more, according to the Commissars at the Bureau of Fake Statistics.

Following President-elect Donald Trump’s victory and Republicans’ major electoral gains in November, outgoing Obama employees and loyalists to failed Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton have found their job prospects in the District foundering, according to Politico.

“It feels like there are just thousands of us trying to find a job, and there are no jobs,” longtime Clinton aide Mira Patel, who worked for Clinton in her Senate, State Department and 2016 campaign offices, told the outlet.

Yeah, that kind of sums up the past 8 years. If you weren’t a Prozi whore, that is.

Clinton aides appear to be having a harder time, both emotionally and practically.

“There’s anger, there’s frustration, there’s anxiety, there’s burnout,” said Russ Finkelstein, a managing director at Clearly Next and longtime progressive career guru (including as a founding team member at the lefty jobs board Idealist.org) who has been counseling Clinton alumni.

Don’t forget puppies, Play-Doh and warm chocolate in your “counseling” sessions. We hear they’re a great hit with the snotty, under-developed brats.

“People are in shock,” said Anastasia Kessler-Dellaccio, 35, who quit her job at Sister Cities International to run Foreign Policy Professionals for Hillary. Some Clinton campaign workers say they’ve lost their bearings because they’re so rattled by the differences in Trump’s values from those represented by Obama and Clinton.

Kessler-Dellaccio added, “I think people, myself included, are trying to figure out, ‘How do I recalibrate my dreams?’”

With a 12 gauge, preferably. Be sure to insert in mouth first prior to pushing the medication dispense button (also called, sometimes, a “trigger”).

Given the dire situation some outgoing Obama staffers are in: “A lot of us are looking for any fit,” Patel said — the soon-to-be-former president is doing what he can to help his supporters find work in Trump’s Washington.

You’ve always been ready for “any fit”, when you think of it. After all, you’re the ones who have spent the past 8 years furiously fellating the Stuttering Clusterfuck of a Miserable Failure for a spot at the trough, so it’d be hard to call you “picky.”

“The president made it a priority to ensure that, throughout his administration, employees had access to professional development resources and tools to help them advance in their careers and transition to new opportunities,” White House spokeswoman Brandi Hoffine told Politico, describing Obama as “extremely grateful” to those staffers who have stayed with him over the years.

We’re sure he is. Why don’t you show up at his Hawaii mansion after January 20th and ask him to demonstrate his “extreme gratitude?” We’re sure that the results would be… interesting.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Thatisall.

8 comments

  1. 1
    LC ShadowFox growls and barks:

    I’m going to need to see a dentist as this shit eating grin just never seems to leave my face!

  2. 2
    Terrapod growls and barks:

    Amen and pass the single malt.

    Seeing that employers are looking for WORKERS, that kind of leaves most proggies out in the cold now, don’t it?

    Entitled, whiny and incapable of rational thought makes it kind of hard to interview and appear competent assuming their addled brain cells choose to fire a synapse or two. This is going to be so much fun I don’t know if stand the sensation of euphoria. :em01:

  3. 3
    Azygos growls and barks:

    You mean the real world has no use for useful useless idiots? I’ve an idea for you Obama sycophants. Why don’t you learn to say “Would you like fries with that?”

    Oh, wait. All those jobs are being filled with robots because you demanded $15 dollars an hour for people who need help figuring out on which side bread is to be buttered.

    Remember down the tracks, not across them.

  4. 4
    Emperor Misha I growls and barks:

    Azygos says:

    Oh, wait. All those jobs are being filled with robots because you demanded $15 dollars an hour for people who need help figuring out on which side bread is to be buttered.

    Reality is such a bitch, isn’t she? :em05:
    Emperor Misha I recently posted..And the Daily Schadenboner UpdateMy Profile

  5. 5
    angrywebmaster growls and barks:

    Anastasia Kessler-Dellaccio, 35, who quit her job at Sister Cities International to run Foreign Policy Professionals for Hillary

    First, I had to look that organization up. They’ve been around since 1956?

    Second. Dear Ms. Kessler-Dellaccio.
    BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

    I have looked up your profile on LinkedIn. Going through your work history, I see that your education and work history make you suitable for a limited number of positions. These positions you would be most suitable for are.

    69
    Missionary
    doggie
    reverse cowboy

    I understand Vivid Video is always looking for new talent, and if the picture on your LinkedIn profile is accurate, you just might make some serious money.

    However, if you are unable to work in front of a camera, the back seats of cars and alleys should work for you.

    *Note, I did find her profile, but won’t post the link here unless requested. She is rather attractive, in the “The eyes are open, but Miss Brain has long since departed.”
    angrywebmaster recently posted..Trump to Kasich: Payback’s a bitchMy Profile

  6. 6
    LC Mike in Chi growls and barks:

    My schadenboner is reaching Big Bang critical mass. The beginning of a whole new universe… Wow

  7. 7
    angrywebmaster growls and barks:

    LC Mike in Chi @ #:

    My schadenboner is reaching Big Bang critical mass. The beginning of a whole new universe… Wow

    Perhaps this is the Schadenboner you seek?
    :em01:
    :em05:
    angrywebmaster recently posted..It isn’t easy being George SorosMy Profile

  8. 8
    LC Rabidfox growls and barks:

    What? Do you mean that all those K street lobbyists don’t have a place for the loyal troops? George S?