And Now, From the Other Side of the Hill

Can we please dispense with the outrage, OUTRAGE at the un-Americanism of the following Trumpisms?:

Banning mooselimb immigration until we can figure out what the fuck is going on and how to filter the good ones from the bad ones?

For examples of what happens when you don’t do that, see “Europe, all of it.”

Keeping a keen eye on the mooselimbs in our midst? No, we’re not talking rounding them all up and sending them off to internment camps. Yet. But they’re pushing it.

Is it really all that unreasonable, when we know that 99.99999999999% of terrorist attacks have been committed by mooselimbs? If you had a sudden surge of rapes in your city where 99.9999999999% of perpetrators were known to wear a propeller beanie, would you be a paranoid “beanophobe” if you started keeping an eye on people walking around with one on top of their heads?

Not all mooselimbs are terrorists, but pretty much all terrorists are mooselimbs. Is it really all that un-American to maybe call that a data point?

We guess it was really pretty fascist for the Roosevelt administration (of which we’re not a fan) to be a bit suspicious of the German-American pro-Hitler bund during World War II. The BASTARDS!

It’s been said before, but the Constitution really ISN’T a suicide pact. Not to mention that we don’t recall which part of it declares it a “right” to belong to a violent group dedicated to destroy the United States through all means necessary. But if we missed a chapter, feel free to point it out to us. You’re free to believe whatever the fuck you want without fear of repercussion, but you’re NOT free to act on those beliefs in ways that cause death and destruction to those who disagree with you.

Besides, in case you’re thinking that it’s all so very unfair and unreasonable to suspect people who’ve done nothing wrong, just how many times have we heard, right after a bunch of mooselimbs shot up a Christmas party for instance, that the perps had been so “very well integrated” and “never given anybody any cause for concern?” It’s all so shocking, shocking we tell you! 100% of the times?

Think about it. We don’t know about you, but it would be cold comfort to us to know that Mohammed and Fatima had been model citizens right up until they turned our children into bloody paste while howling “allah u snack bar” in one of those “inexplicable” outbreaks of “sudden jihad syndrome”, so it would have been unfair to as much as look at them askance prior to the murder.

We suppose it’s “unfair” for law enforcement to keep a jaundiced eye on neo-Nazis, biker gangs and meth rings as well, even when they don’t have a solid case to make against them yet. We should just always wait until after the fact to as much as think about maybe wondering what the fuck is going on, right?

Building a wall and make Mexico pay for it? Listen, we think that most of us can agree that our wide open border to the south is in dire need of at least a bit of patching, no? So what’s wrong with making Mexico, who have profited immensely from exporting their “undesirables” to us for decades, pay for it? It’s not like it hasn’t cost us anything, is it? Personally, we believe we should invade Mexico, annex it and install a government more likely to not fuck us up the Khyber, but we’ll settle for them at least having to help foot the bill for not turning us into their welfare office/open prison for murderers and rapists.

If you disagree, you can tell it to Kathy Steinle. Whoops. You can’t, can you?


0 0 votes
Article Rating
Newest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
January 21, 2016 03:40

I disagree with Trumps plan on building a wall. I think some fencing and a nice mine field would be better and probably cheaper. It would also help feed the local wildlife when Juan tries to cross in and BOOM!

January 21, 2016 03:51

personally, i prefer to call them “moose slimes”, but that’s just me…

Trump is the only candidate approaching sanity on the illegal immigration issue, which is why i’m willing to overlook other things.

if we don”t get rid of the illegals, nothing else is going to matter, long term.

January 21, 2016 08:49

Look, at this time I will profess to be a trump (probable) voter. I like some of what cruz has said, and IF (big if) he ever grew a set of public balls and just said the same things that trump has said, and laid out a plan to achieve said goal(s), i would jump faster than a frog in… Read more »