The Final Phase: Acceptance

Even the GOPe shills at NRO are beginning to see the writing on the wall.

Why I’d Vote for Trump If He Were the GOP Nominee
By Ian Tuttle — January 15, 2016

Now, before we go any further, let’s once again reiterate that Trump is not our ideal candidate. Our ideal candidate isn’t in the race, but Cruz comes closest. Not Trump. But we can’t not be grateful to Trump for bringing up issues that actually matter to conservative Americans as opposed to the Ex-Im Bank or the definition of the “nuclear triad”, which we still don’t give a fuck about except as a Jeopardy question. He’s forced the rest of the droning morons to actually start pretending like they give a damn, and that ain’t nothing.

And we’re also glad to see that at least one of the “Party Loyalty Above All, As Long As It’s Our Candidate” morons at NRO remembering that loyalty works both ways. That’s a refreshing change from the GOPe that we’ve all learned to hate with a purple passion.

And yes, we’re annoyed about the whole “eligibility” issue about Cruz as well, but it’s better that it be brought up now than in October. And if you’re drain bamaged enough to think that the Prozi Party wouldn’t bring it up in October, then we really have nothing left to talk to you about. We’d much prefer that it’d been settled in January of last year, but you don’t go to war with the army you wish you had.

All of that out of the way, Tuttle’s piece still made us want to puke.

The Republican party is the party of Abraham Lincoln, Dwight D. Eisenhower, and Ronald Reagan, men of sober judgment, careful administration, and high ideals who elevated not only their party but also the country. What party could reasonably lay claim to both Ronald Reagan and Donald Trump?

Not to piss in your cornflakes (we’re lying, that’s exactly what we intend to do), but this whole embracing of the Gipper coming from GOPe shills makes us want to throw up. Granted, there are fewer and fewer of us with every passing year, but some of us do remember how you latter day holies were shitting all over that “B-movie actor peasant with no grasp of the important issues” back in the early days, meaning 1980.

So kindly don’t insult our intelligence by pretending otherwise and suddenly claiming Ronald Reagan as “one of yours” when we all know that he wasn’t. You wasted no opportunity leveling all of the charges against him that you do now against Donald Trump.

We’re not all idiots with no grasp of history, you know.

Similarly, the coalition of free-thinking men and women that formed the conservative movement in the mid 1950s, that made possible a President Reagan,

You mean, “that did everything within their power to make it impossible for Reagan to get the nomination, right?” Thankfully, you failed, or we would have been speaking Russian as a first language today.

and that continues to constitute a political movement more staunch in its support for free markets,

As exemplified in Big Sugar, Big Ethanol and import of cheap slave labor, you mean? Funnily enough, that’s not what “free markets” means to us.

a limited government,

“No Teacher’s Salary Left Behind” and the second biggest expansion in Federal Government (surpassed only by Princess Precious Perfect’s excesses) to name a few examples.

and the sanctity of human life than any other in American history

Full funding of the baby chop shop known as Planned Parenthood as the latest of the GOPe’s “victories” comes to mind.

Gag us with a spoon, please.

What definition of “conservative” could encompass Bill Buckley and Donald Trump?

We’re fairly certain that Bill Buckley is spinning furiously in his grave right now at what his publication has turned into.

RELATED: Obama’s Failings Are the Reason for Trump’s Rise

In fairness, that is not part of the author’s article, that’s one of the links auto-inserted in articles, but it’s a perfect example of the disconnect between “conservatives” and actual American conservatives.

Trump’s rise isn’t fueled by Obama’s failures, innumerable though they are. It’s primarily fueled by a “conservative” GOPe’s complete, willful, deliberate betrayal of everything they claim to stand for. Sorry, but you don’t get to blame Obumfuck for this one.

Throughout all of the 8 damnable years we, the people, have watched you stab us in the back at every turn. You started out by saying that you really, really wanted to stop the Marxist-in-Chief’s destruction of all that we hold sacred, but you couldn’t without control of the House. Fair enough. We gave you the House. You then proceeded to give him everything he wanted because you didn’t control the Senate (that was a lie, by the way, as you could have stopped him dead by refusing to fund a damn thing he pushed through, but we were daft enough to give you the benefit of the doubt).

So we gave you the Senate. And you betrayed us AGAIN.

You expect us to believe a single futhermucking one of you ever again? Sorry, but we’re all out of Dumb.

Fuck, we even helped you oust Orange Crush Boner, only to see Paul Neckbeard Ryan surrender unconditionally in the face of nothing to fund every. single. G-ddamn, motherfucking ONE of Obumhole’s initiatives.

And, to add insult to injury, we’ve watched you for 8 interminably long years screech, howl and preach at us how “party unity” matters, only to see you go as far as to support the fucking ENEMY candidate when your preferred buttfucker didn’t win.

If we hate you, and we do, you have nobody but yourselves to blame.

And so along comes somebody like Trump and he bloody well crushes you because he proudly and loudly proclaims all the things that us “unworthy peasants” have been trying to get you assholes to take seriously for decades and you act all butthurt and unfairly treated because we prefer him over you and your habitual, self-serving lies?

Maybe you should retreat to your safe spaces and curl up in the fetal position. You certainly have a lot of experience in the latter.

All of this could have been avoided if, for once, just occasionally, you’d actually kept your promises and listened to the “irrelevant, vulgarian, wacko-bird voters” to whom you owe your fucking sinecures.

Do we know that Trump is going to be any different? We sure as fuck don’t, which is why His Imperial Majesty has serious misgivings about him being the next President of the United States, but we do know, beyond a scintilla of a doubt, that you fuckheads of the GOPe can’t be trusted and will fuck us over the moment you’re elected.

You’ve proven it again and again and again and again.

This is one of those cases where it’s better to bet on the devil you don’t know than the devil you do, because the devil you DO know is going to ream you up the Khyber so hard that you won’t be able to sit like a normal person ever again.

It’s all on you, assholes.

In the end, you lose, we win.


0 0 votes
Article Rating
Newest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
angrywebmaster (@angrywebmaster)
January 16, 2016 06:26

Some of the GOP(e) types are starting to get it. Most aren’t. One clown “Holland Redfield, an RNC committeeman who represents the minority-rich Virgin Islands” went on a full rant against people like Trump Cruz and the Tea party types. They are blind to what’s going on, and refuse to understand that “bad times” are coming unless structural changes are… Read more »

VAconservative (@vaconservative)
January 16, 2016 07:34

So glad you brought up that annoying little fact about how hated Reagan was by the Elite GOP of 1980. Those of us old enough to remember know it is no different now for Trump. And even though once upon a time rather conversant in Russian, glad for Reagan that we didn’t have to brush up on that. And by… Read more »

BC, Imperial Torturer
BC, Imperial Torturer (@beecee)
January 16, 2016 08:16

Truer words have never been spoken, Mein Imperator! The RINO L337 Cunt-Tree Clubbers think that we’re as dumb as the doorknob-licking meth heads who installed the current Marxist Occupier in the WH. There are only so many times one can take a railroad spike-studded telephone pole up the ass from one’s own party before one starts to realize that perhaps,… Read more »

angrywebmaster (@angrywebmaster)
January 16, 2016 10:41

BC, Imperial Torturer @ #: If it comes down to Trump or anyone but Cruz, Teh Donald gets the nod from me. The rest of ‘em can go snuggle up to the underside of Obongo’s shriveled nut sac. I’m coming the same conclusion. Trump or Cruz, (With a possible Carson), or screw them. I have a feeling that when I… Read more »

Radical Redneck
Radical Redneck (@radical-redneck)
January 16, 2016 15:56
angrywebmaster (@angrywebmaster)
January 16, 2016 17:00
Terrapod (@terrapod)
January 16, 2016 19:28

Trump would be worth voting for just to see all of the elites crap in their pants and fill their shoes with piss. And frankly, I think any team he puts together for an administration will be light years better than what we have had since Ronnie left office. I just hope the Donald learns from history and immediately fires… Read more »

L.C. Mope
L.C. Mope (@lc-mope)
January 16, 2016 20:00

Gentlemens, (And I use that endearing term loosely,) I present: I, too am not so blind as to think the Trump couldn’t use the same barbed wired wrapped telephone pole on me as the GOP elite, but hopefully I’ll at least get a reach-around. Suffice it to say, Our Esteemed Imperial Minister of Truth nailed it 3 years ago:… Read more »

L.C. Mope
L.C. Mope (@lc-mope)
January 16, 2016 20:01

P.S. Make mine an Apple Pie Margarita.

BC, Imperial Torturer
BC, Imperial Torturer (@beecee)
January 17, 2016 22:31

L.C. Mope @ #:

Mope! How the Hell are ya’, my brutha from anutha mutha!?!?!?!? Gimme a shout ober by dere!

irish19 (@irish19)
January 19, 2016 10:31

Terrapod says: Trump would be worth voting for just to see all of the elites crap in their pants and fill their shoes with piss. And frankly, I think any team he puts together for an administration will be light years better than what we have had since Ronnie left office. I just hope the Donald learns from history and… Read more »