On Gratitude
I’m in a bit of a pensive mood tonight and finding myself the mid-shift Duty Officer, it seems as if I have the chance to get something up for us all to consider.
Life indeed hands us some unexpected and downright unpleasantness. Be not troubled because He who is really in control has a plan for all of us. Does it involve success, money, popularity and to be loved by all? Hardly. In fact the love of that someone special is all we really need. The twists and turns our lives take while disturbing to us, is just part of the plan that we have no ken for. Yes I do get angry at our Divine Creator at times, but it’s a human failing or perhaps a fault of our society that we demand to get what “we” want and right-fucking now! This I know, that He will never let us fall without a plan for something bigger and better for us, all in good time, let me repeat that, all in good time. Perhaps to rephrase what I’m getting at here would be something like this: “At this exact instant, do we have all that we really, really need?”
So the question I have for us in the wee hours of this morning in the Berkshires, is somewhat rhetorical in nature. Whatever the case might be at this moment, did we honestly expect to be here, now and where we are?
The best laid plans of mice and men indeed…….
I know I sure didn’t expect it to be this way, but dammitall I’m OK is the answer between my ears. I’ll be grateful for where I am and what I have today, because all is well in G-d’s Universe, He doesn’t make mistakes…..ever. We’re just bit actors in this play friends.
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Whatever the case might be at this moment, did we honestly expect to be here, now and where we are? No. I am still trying to find the sense or reason in the fact I am now alone. I fought so hard and so long, and I find myself asking is this all there is now? Was Marions death the… Read more »
Through the years I have come to realize I not only don’t know the answer(s) to questions posed to the Almighty, I am not even sure of the proper questions (at any given time). Mostly by my own hand and stupidity, I have been in positions where “Why me (Lord)?!!!” was uttered with a loud vehimance into the dark night.… Read more »
LCBrendan says: Whatever the case might be at this moment, did we honestly expect to be here, now and where we are? No. I am still trying to find the sense or reason in the fact I am now alone. I fought so hard and so long, and I find myself asking is this all there is now? Was Marions… Read more »
Jackboot Im not sure anymore. I just feel..numb. I can and have gone back to work..so what? Now what? Whats next? Will I be alone forever now? Is my life over too? I keep asking myself: is there nothing more? Did I expect to be here? FUCK NO. They keep telling me that God works in mysterious ways and He… Read more »
LCBrendan says: Jackboot Im not sure anymore. I just feel..numb. I can and have gone back to work..so what? Now what? Whats next? Will I be alone forever now? Is my life over too? I keep asking myself: is there nothing more? Did I expect to be here? FUCK NO. They keep telling me that God works in mysterious ways… Read more »
Jaybear, Colonel of Imperial Ancient Artillery says:
That should read this gave ME the time to do the things I always DREAMED of doing…..
age sure plays hell with your proofreeding skills.
Brendon, if it appeared in my comment above that I was saying “Don’t worry, God works in mysterious ways, and it will get better, you just wait and see!” That was not my intent or desire. I have no real way of knowing your pain (other than which you chose to share with us) or the depth of which it… Read more »
Guy its fine that wasnt aimed at you…just the phrase in general. Bleh.
We never had kids and right now Im not sure if that was a blessing or a curse. I’ll manage.
Brendan- My story isn’t all that different than Jaybear’s we share the same awful disease that will kill us if we go out. In that context each day is a struggle to survive because the alternative is absolutely certain. Now this poses a problem for us. Boredom is deadly and when faced with that we revert to our stinking thinking… Read more »
LCBrendan says:
didn’t take it personal brudda……just concerned about you, that’s all.
OT, but not altogether: Here’s a source for legal incandescent light bulbs, a new type with 10X the lifespan:
Newcandescent incandescent bulbs. Let’s keep them in business. (No, I have no connection with them personally, but I love to see American ingenuity confronting tyranny.)
The Father gave you an awesome noggin, put it to use brother. My head is fine. My heart aches and my soul is miserable. I miss her every day, I cant seem to stop crying some days and its getting to the poiint that all I want to do is hide away and forget the world is there. I had… Read more »
JB, as the old saying goes, life is what happens while we are making other plans. I can only relate what I have learned and am learning from my own life journey, in the event that it means anything to the fine people who congregate here. Everything in life is temporary. The bad, and the good. The most valuable things… Read more »
So very sorry for your loss, LCBrendan. Death is such a relentless monster. It tears an agonizing hole in your heart. I can only offer that while my own wounds from it have never gone away, I’ve learned to keep going forward. It doesn’t “get better”, but it gets “perspectived”. I have only recently been able to laugh about funny… Read more »
LC Second Mouse- Everything in life is temporary. The bad, and the good. The most valuable things in life are not things at all. They are the connections we make with others, and the ideas we share about purpose and meaning. They are the blessings we confer on others through our own existence. Each one is a marker for our… Read more »
LC Jackboot IC/A @ #15:
Thank you for your kind words. It would be an odd flock indeed, if I were its preacher.
I don’t remember who said it, nor the specific words, but the measure of one’s character is what he or she does for someone who can do nothing for them in return.
Dearest Brendan, there is only one answer. When Mary and Martha grieved for Lazarus, they wept and said to him, “My Lord, if you had been here, Lazarus would not have died.” And Jesus wept. And then he raised Lazarus from the dead. He knows, and your dear wife is with Him. You will see her again. Throw yourself into… Read more »
This is an amazing story: how two Iranian muslim women found Jesus:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bkczulZ-LkY
It’s a death sentence in islam to be an apostate, as all of you know. Who among us would be so brave? They are now ministering in Iran’s underground church.
Tallulah says: Those of us (yes, me too! hi, y’all!) who have received the great gift of a second life in AA are lucky beyond measure, because we, too, have seen people brought back from the dead. Every day we see miracles. And every day we have the priceless chance to help another human soul out of the abyss of… Read more »
Jaybear, Colonel of Imperial Ancient Artillery @ #: Got sober in 1979: college senior. 🙂 Actually at the behest of my friends, who were doing acid and mushrooms, and playing in a rock and roll band — but I was out-drinking Janis Joplin, if you know what I mean! (If I’d been doing drugs, too, I’d be as dead as… Read more »