Articles from July 2012



Another Heart Warming Story… Not

About how businesses promise you the moon, then ignore you until they realize that you weren’t just the insignificant peasant that they thought they could screw over without consequences following. Welcome to the Internets, douchebags, where everything you ever do to ream your customers up the Khyber Pass will be documented. And no, we’re not

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ABC… #WINNING!

Or should we call it “another nail in the coffin?” We don’t know. When it comes to the Lapdog Media, we don’t think a coffin will do the trick. A stake through the heart is required as well. And decapitation. A bit of burning would be nice too. Until they turn nice and crispy. Not

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Who gave Ice-T the Imperial Cluebat™?

There maybe hope yet… Ice-T Defends Gun Rights: “The Last Form Of Defense Against Tyranny” It’s legal in the United States,” the rapper said. “The right to bear arms is because that’s the last form of defense against tyranny. Not to hunt. It’s to protect yourself from the police.

Saturday Night Awesome Open Thread

His Imperial Majesty doesn’t normally have much use for a capella, but this guy is just… amazing, that’s what:

Petard. Hoist. (UPDATED)

Sultan Knish, who will forthwith be found on the Imperial Blogroll, decides to let Ogabe have his “you didn’t build it” argument, mostly because Ogabe looks so funny impaled on it: Let’s take Obama’s “You didn’t make that happen” message at face value. If nothing truly happens without the gov making it happen, then the

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Money talks

I know that in the wake of this insanity, we mourn, we pray..and in all truth, one salient fact gets buried in the entirety. Every place that will not allow CHL carry is a potential free fire zone with you as the target. I’d like to suggest that maybe it’s time to consider making these

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So Much For the “Insanity Defense”

Not that we believe for one solitary second that whichever scumsucking, lowlife attorney defending the Aurora beast won’t try it, because that’s what they are and it’s what they do. Everything within their power to set animals loose back in the wild to commit more mayhem. But it may be an uphill battle to make

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This is Why Some Atheists Ought to be Publicly Caned

But at least Tom Flynn of the Center for Secular Humanism cut to the core of the real issue facing the nation after the Aurora shootings, namely the utter impropriety of the president to offer his prayers to the victims and their loved ones. “Even in a situation like this, [when] he leads a public

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Business Owner “Coincidentally” Gets Hit by Shit Storm After Making it to the Fascist Ogabe Government’s Enemies List

You may remember Frank VanderSloot, a successful business man who built up his business literally from the ground up (HE DIDN’T BUILD THAT! – Barry Hussein Soetoro) — oh DO sod off, Jugears — and who, until recently, hadn’t ever been in any sort of trouble with the legal authorities. Until he wrote a check

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Gun Free Zone Claims Lives of 12 More Innocents

See what we did there? If the Lapdog Media can get away with knee-jerk assigning blame for the Aurora shootings to the “extreme right” simply by finding somebody on the Internet associated with the Tea Party who happens to have the same wholly unremarkable name as the insane fuckbag of scum who did it, then

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Mheh

Of course, in this particular case, the statement is absolutely true. Which, come to think of it, only makes it better. Do fuck off, Jugears McDepression, do fuck right the fuck off. Thatisall.

Our Thanks to President Downgrade McLinks

For continuing to write our campaign ads for us every time he opens his pig ignorant, communist, coke-sniffing, cocksucker mouth. There’s a village desperately needing its idiot back (Chicago), and the way things are going, they’re going to get their wish. Bonus video: Thatisall.

Live Forever?

(H/t Daily Pundit) We’re not going to slam the entrepreneurial spirit of this sprightly Russian engineer suggesting that he can create a way of uploading the human consciousness into an android, making us independent of our mortal meat sacks, nor can we say that we’re surprised that somebody is working on it. We’ve long thought

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Look For the Union Label!

You may just find it on grandpa or grandma’s corpse! After the collapse of 17-month-long union negotiations on July 3, unionized health-care workers walked out of five nursing home facilities in Connecticut, but not before placing some elderly patients in dire medical risk through acts of sabotage, according to the company that owns and operates

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If We Owned a Bar

We’d have urinals like these in the men’s room (thanks to Tallulah, LC and GLOR for the inspiration):