Articles from March 2012



Reichsführer Ogabe Postpones Recovery Another 5 Years

“Under my plan, energy prices would necessarily skyrocket.” – B. Hussein Obunghole, 2008 And at least that’s one promise he has kept. The Obama administration today endorsed new oil and gas exploration along the Atlantic Coast, setting the stage for possible future drilling lease sales. The announcement by the Interior Department sets into motion what

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And Now, Because We Know How Much You Love Vice President Choo Choo’s Antics…

We bring the latest in our series, “Joe the Nut Fluffer Biden Does the Presidential Staff…” (If you know what we mean and we think that you do). Vice President Joe Biden today assured a group of campaign donors in Wisconsin that Republican criticism of President Obama’s leadership style doesn’t match up with what he’s

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TV Host Nobody Watches Will Now Be Able to Sit at Home and Not Be Watched [UPDATED]

Via The Angry Webmaster: Current TV said Friday afternoon that it had terminated the contract of its lead anchor Keith Olbermann, scarcely one year after he was hired to reboot the fledgling channel in his progressive political image. How better to boot a douchenozzle nobody watches than by announcing it on a day when nobody

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Still Waiting For Justice

What, it’s been a week now since the New Black Panthers publicly put out a contract on a private citizen and the FBI still hasn’t been making arrests now? His Imperial Majesty guesses that means that putting out contracts on people in public is no longer illegal, as long as you have the right skin

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In Keeping With the Current Theme

His Imperial Majesty decided to create his very own motivational poster: Thatisall.

Teh Weekly Funny And Open Thread

Ever wonder about the ultimate solution to protecting ourselves from gun violence? Well there’s a solution to that pesky problem for all y’all folks that are skeeerd of havin’ one of those evil guns for themselves. It’s the Gun Free Zone™ It’s great and can be established anywhere you like. Buy one today and sleep

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Prayers, please.

LCs, the report has come in that the Empress Sophie is in the hospital with pulmonary embolisms in both lungs. Drop what you’re doing, and pray. We are over here at Chez Venomous.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

You may not remember the blackmail outfit Righthaven LLC who thought to make a tidy profit out of buying up copyrights to newspaper items and then suing anybody as much as quoting said items until they could reach a “settlement” (as in: pay this and we’ll stop harassing you), but apparently they’ve come to a

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Racist “White Hispanic” Vigilante Murderer Slaying Innocent Little Child™ Narrative Unravelling [UPDATED AGAIN]

As we suspected all along but, unlike the Enemy Media™, we prefer to wait until actual facts start coming in prior to issuing a verdict like, say, the Duke Lacrosse Rapists and Sister Mangum of the Chastisty Church™ narrative that worked out so well for the Enemy Media. (h/t Ace O’ Spades): Trayvon Martin may

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The Shit We’re Really In

I caught a bit of Zer0′s campaign propaganda in Oklahoma the other day and I have to admit I’m impressed by the sheer number of lies and distortions he can pack into a few minute speech. His audacity is beyond belief. Only someone who has utter confidence in the media to give him a pass

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Still Looking for One Single Solitary Difference Between Ogabe and Ogamney

And still having no luck whatsoever. “Oh, but he’s going to do something to lower gas prices!” Really? (h/t Cold Fury): When lieutenant governor Kerry Healey, a fellow Republican, called for suspending the state’s 23.5 cent gas tax during a price spike in May 2006, Romney rejected the idea, saying it would only further drive

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And The Tourette’s Award of the Year Goes to… [UPDATED]

Reichsführer Ogabe’s life insurance policy, Joe “choo-choo” Biden: Vice President Joseph Biden on Monday night upped the ante around the already quite-dramatic assassination of Osama bin Laden. From the pool report of Biden’s comments during a fundraising event in New Jersey come these quotes. You can go back 500 years. You cannot find a more

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Enough. Just. Fucking ENOUGH With Those Blue-Shirted Swine Already!!!

Shoot the whole sorry lot of them after a perfunctory trial, preferably one involving sticking fingers up their privates and molesting them. For weeks. Before we get to the point, allow His Imperial Majesty to apologize most profusely for his horrid inactivity. If anybody is still bothering to read this near-dead site, we can’t begin

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Just A Brief Interlude

Seems most of the staff in these hereabouts have had a gross abandonment of the muse we all depend on to write our drivel by. I’m sure that in short order we’ll pass through the damned doldrums and return to our usual plethora of productions for our fine, Loyal Citizens here. For me, it’s been

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