Posts belonging to Category Idiotarians'

Dumbest News of the Week

Religious fundamentalists take over knitting website, announces ban of all heretics: According to an announcement at Ravelry’s website, “We are banning support of Donald Trump and his administration on Ravelry.” The company says the ban was inspired by a policy at role-playing site RPG.net. The ban includes “support in the form of forum posts, projects,

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Things are Still Dumb, We See…

Well, as it has been said, we live in interesting times. And remarkably dumb ones, too. We haven’t seen this much dumb since old man Marcus Licinius Crassus decided to march about 45,000 men in a straight line across the desert rather than follow the river conveniently located right next to him. Always one to

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Today, in “Truth to Power™” News

It appears that Code Pink (Pussyhat) have filed for permission to fly the “giant” Trump balloon of London fame at the President’s 4th of July address. (Somebody must have slapped some duct tape on it. We seem to recall it was stabbed to death recently overseas.) In case you’ve never heard of it, here’s a

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Dodgeball is Apparently a Lot Cooler than We Thought

If one were to take the following article at face value, which one most definitely shouldn’t. One of gym classes’ most common games is being used as a tool of “oppression,” according to a team of Canadian researchers. We suppose we could stop right there. “Canadian researchers?” Sounds about as impressive as “French Strategic Geniuses”,

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‘Twas a Much Needed Vacation

Greetings and salutations, spectatores! We know we’ve been gone for a while (again, we hear you sigh, our apologies!), but it was really just what the doc ordered. If we’d asked him to order anything, that is, which we didn’t. Kinda nice to kick back and ignore the “news” for a while, pretending that the

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Occasional Cortex is Afraid, Very Afraid

…of that strange, noisy thing in her kitchen sink. Apparently AOC doesn’t know what a garbage disposal is or what it’s used for according to her latest Instagram story. pic.twitter.com/H2i2dFWpkD — Courtney Holland ?? (@hollandcourtney) May 7, 2019 BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Terrified? Of a garbage disposal??? And this is the same sub-moronic twit who is constantly twattering

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The Joys of Nationalized Healthcare

The Brits are at it again, this time poisoning confused children with untested drugs. Staff quit NHS clinic over ethics and safety fears The only NHS gender clinic for children is risking a “live experiment” by sending hundreds for life-changing medical intervention without sufficient evidence of its long-term effects, experts have warned. The Times has

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Idiotarians on Parade

So apparently the band at the White House was playing show tunes, and this got Ace Reporter Maggie Haberman all verklempt: Now, if you don’t know who she is, you’re in good company with the other 99.9999999999999999999999999999% of the planet’s population who neither watch CNN nor read the NYT. Maggie, you’re as dumb as a

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And Now, For Some Comedy Relief

If stupidity were a religion, Occasional-Cortex would be its high priestess. She is the monument to imbecility around the base of which lesser idiots gather to worship. But she’s good for a good, healthy laugh, so there is that. Thatisall.

How to NOT do History

Now for something completely apolitical, because G-d knows that we’re getting quite enough of that on a daily basis, thank you very much. So, we were watching the Hitler Channel’s show “Hunting Hitler”, and… Now, now, stop laughing. Yes, we know exactly where Hitler went after WWII. He went, after a short stop in a

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This Whole “What Will They Do Now the Collusion Coup Turned Out to be a Dud” is a Bit…

…disappointing. If President Trump follows through with his threat to close the Southern Border with Mexico this week, say goodbye to your avocado toast. A top distributor and grower of avocados has warned that the U.S. would run out of the fruit in three weeks if imports from Mexico are halted amid any possible border

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Our Schadenboner Just Won’t Stop Growing

At which point should we go see a doctor? (Thanks, Ace). The sense of mourning started to take hold over the weekend, after Attorney General William P. Barr said that Robert S. Mueller III, the special counsel, had not found coordination between President Trump’s campaign and the Russian government’s election interference in 2016. Over the

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The Prozi Left Can’t be Parodied

They ARE a parody. We remember when this was hysterically funny: OK, so it’s still hysterically funny, but back then, that was ALL that it was. And it was hysterically funny because surely, certainly, no WAY could anybody actually human, in real life, ever say something as patently ridiculous as this. Not so much anymore.

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Another Fake Caught Lying

This fake Mexican being less Mexican than Lizzie “0.001%” Warren is American Indian: Beto O'Rourke touts support from his 'lifelong Republican' mom on the trail, but records reviewed by @KFile and @chrismassie show that she's voted in Democratic primaries in 15 of the last 17 primaries that’s she’s participated in.https://t.co/OR2lvqvRCs — Nathan McDermott (@natemcdermott) October

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Oh, How We Laughed

Nobody does it better than the Chicago Tribune. Prime Minister Theresa May and colleagues in Britain’s government reconfirm the quality and effectiveness of her nation’s police and intelligence work. Sorry, but that one had us in stitches for so long that we had to take a twenty minute break before continuing.