Malaysia Disaster

I’m just getting caught back up after spending forever and a day at Dell, and of course as I was finishing up I heard something big happened down in Malaysia where most of their laptops are produced. To see if it could have an impact on shipments I shot over to Malaysian News.net, but from the look of things the top story at the time shouldn’t impact laptop prices.

Malaysian Prime Minister’s goats stolen

Kuala Lumpur, Dec 25. (PTI): Two goats belonging to Malaysian Prime Minister Abdullah Ahmad Badawi have been stolen from a government facility in the north of the country, a media report said today.

Holy moly! Is there no limit to man’s perfidity? Where were the minister’s caprine security forces? I simply had to read the gritty details of this earth shattering tale, skipping the site’s third link to something about a quake and tsunami.

The two Australian Boer goats were presented to Badawi a few years back by some businessmen and were placed under the care of a veterinary department in Penang state in northern Malaysia, ‘The Star’ daily said.

What kind of businessman gives goes up to a prime minister and gives him a pair of goats? What kind of thieves then plot to steal them? Will this true-life incident form the plot of the next Bond flick or give us “The Bourne Inanity”?

The pair of Boers worth about USD 1,300 were stolen along with 11 other goats after the thieves gained entry to the department’s compound by cutting its perimeter fencing, the report said.

OK, now I’ve got the theme music from “Mission Impossible” playing in my head as I picture a squad of ninja clad secret agents slipping through the fences, security lasers, and guard towers, then catapulting over the inner wall and hacking the security system to get into the holding pens. Obviously they couldn’t risk having the other goats trigger the alarms, so they took them too, hustling the whole group into unmarked white vans and speeding off into the dark night, tossing out smoke grenades to thwart any government jeeps that might pursue.

The theft was discovered by the veterinary department’s staff on Thursday when they conducted a head count, it said.

They started shouting in German as the peaceful morning was shattered by the compound’s air-raid sirens, and within minutes diplomatic and emergency lines lit up all across the Pacific Rim. The goats were missing.”

Police were checking abattoirs and breeding farms to look for culprits and the animals, the paper said.

They can save the trouble since the goats are already halfway to Morocco on Dr. Evil’s private Airbus A340, enroute to Skull Island, but rest assured I’ll keep my finger on the pulse of this one, even though the true facts will remain shrouded in secrecy for decades.

63 comments

  1. 1
    B.C., Imperial Torturer? growls and barks:

    They’re already in Western Pakistan/Eastern Afghanistan enjoying their nuptials with Osama.

  2. 2
    Beth growls and barks:

    Well, I have nothing witty to say about this goat-rope story, but I’m glad to see y’all back!

    I hope your Christmas went well!

  3. 3
    QuickSilver growls and barks:

    Looks like one of the goatlovers couldn’t wait for his 72 virgin goats, so he went after some more earthly ones. At least these ones probably have some experience… Really, breaking in a virgin goat MUST be a difficult and dangerous experience.

  4. 4

    Really, breaking in a virgin goat MUST be a difficult and dangerous experience.

    Y’know, really, I could have lived like the rest of my life without having someone put this thought in my head.

    Honestly.

  5. 5
    LC Brendan growls and barks:

    The tsunami, by the way, has left 29,000 dead. Almost as if God Himself looked down and smashed the place.

    Dear God….

  6. 6
    Special Ed, Half-Vast Conspirator growls and barks:

    29000? There are a lot more than that, and a lot more to follow. Water purification, bathing, and the disposal of the dead (animals-fish-human) can help a lot.

    But it takes time to transport and distribute significant amounts of aid from here to there. Any help right now is better than all the help next week.

    Now would be a good time to have massive airlift capacity.

  7. 7
    LC Brendan growls and barks:

    On the way and more enroute.Major operation now underway, anf you can bet that a lot of people, including Aussie relief teams, will be doing their best.

    Medecins Sans Frontieres(yes yes I know we discussed them last time) will also be there,doing what they can. They do have their good moments as well..and I wish them..all of them,Godspeed.

  8. 8
    Mark growls and barks:

    Now would be a good time to have massive airlift capacity.

    I echo that, Special Ed. Lover boys should get the ball rolling.

  9. 9
    LC Brendan growls and barks:

    Listen, you little shit, take that crap and shove it where the sun dont shine in springtime.

    Take that garbage and post it elsewhere.

    Nearly 30,000 people dead, thw world including the US sending their own people in harms way, using teir rescue resources, medical personnel and supplies, including Australian teams who will be in the middle of this, and you have the fucking brazen gall to throw this crap???

    GROW THE FUCK UP.

  10. 10
    LC Brendan growls and barks:

    As the enormity of the devastation becomes apparent the aid agencies are stepping up their efforts to provide water, shelter, food and medical assistance.

    Aid has been flowing in, the Australian government promising $10 million, the Victorian government pledging $1.5 million to aid agencies, and the National Australia Bank contributing $100,000 as part of a wider fund set up at its branches.

    But it is the generosity of Australians which has overwhelmed the aid agencies CARE Australia, the Red Cross, World Vision Australia and Oxfam.

    A Red Cross Australia spokesman said $1 million had been donated by Australians since its help line started on Monday.

    That’s 1 million in 24 hours, Markie baby, all from private citizens

    Aust has also sent 60 1,000-litre water tanks to Trincomalee and was preparing 25,000 food packs containing rice, flour, dhal, fish, sugar and cereal.

    A further 10,000 hygiene packs including soap, sanitary towels, candles, matches and other essentials were being prepared.

    In Sri Lanka alone, CARE Australia expects to provide food to 14,000 in the Batticaloa district over the next four days.

    It also is providing aid to Tamil Nadu, Andhra Pradesh, Kerela and Pondicherry in the south-east of India, to the Thailand provinces of Phuket, Krabi, Phang Nga and Ranong, and to Indonesia, namely Aceh.

    Clean water and emergency kits containing food, water purification tablets, soap, shelter materials, basic medical supplies and cooking supplies are being sent to the worst affected areas.

    And that’s for starters.

  11. 11
    Mark growls and barks:

    Only a stupid Aussie, from whose country hail the businessmen who presented the Malaysian Prime Minister with the two goats in question, would believe my post was offensive.

  12. 12
    Mark growls and barks:

    What kind of businessman goes up to a prime minister and gives him a pair of goats?

    See above, Sir George.

  13. 13
    kschlenker growls and barks:

    My daughter Christine was jealous because one of her friends got to vacation in Thailand as a Christmas gift from her father and stepmother. Plus they were going to get her handmade clothes there as part of the gift. Christine talked about it alot.
    Then this happened. It took until yesterday for Christine and her other friends to finally find out her friend and her family are safe in Bangkok. They are staying over to help with relief efforts. Now like the good kid she is, Christine is jealous because she can’t go help…

  14. 14
    kschlenker growls and barks:

    By “this” I mean the tidal waves. I mean, I remember the tidal waves in ’64, even if I was only two and a half.

    The goats; probably cabrito by now.

  15. 15
    Elephant Man growls and barks:

    Can you believe this sniveling ass-monkey?!?!

    U.N. official slams U.S. as “stingy” over aid

    Of course you can’t spell ungrateful without UN

  16. 16
    LC Xealot growls and barks:

    Remember Elephant man, the UN will never be satisfied until they can redistribute the entire Gross National Product of the USA to terrorists and dictators.

  17. 17
    Elephant Man growls and barks:

    Xealot,

    The best part was when that asshat claimed that americans and euros want their taxes raised to subsidize “the poor and less fortunate around the world”.

  18. 18
    LCNEilV growls and barks:

    Also stolen were 13 pairs of Knee high boots,and a 50 gallon drum of KY industrial strength, cherry flavored love lube.
    Cheers from Sunny Tampa Bay

  19. 19
    Elephant Man growls and barks:

    It took awhile for me to load up the “Lover boy” clip that Mark had linked . Maybe I need more RAM in my computer.

    And Brendan, don’t let Mark get your goat!

    ;)

  20. 20
    The Management™ growls and barks:

    Only a stupid Aussie, from whose country hail the businessmen who presented the Malaysian Prime Minister with the two goats in question, would believe my post was offensive.

    Actually, Marci, this American – having only viewed the first 10 seconds of the video – found it offensive as well.

    You’re back on thin ice, son.  Suggest you put a cork in it for a while.

  21. 21
    Mark growls and barks:

    Actually, Marci, this American, having only viewed the first 10 seconds of the video, found it offensive as well.

    Thought it was a nice – albeit, hilarious – tribute from one ally to another, Spats. (BC, perhaps?)

  22. 22
    StinKerr growls and barks:

    Elephant Man,

    It looks like Steve Yuhas has already given the treatment to the fucknozzle at the UN. I’m sure someone here could improve on it though….

  23. 23
    DumbAss Tanker growls and barks:

    It’s hard to imagine the tsunami not breaking six figures easily when all is said and done, the region’s population is both immense and heavily settled in coastal areas, I’m sure the only reason the count is only as high as it is now is due to communication and infrastructure failures on a massive scale.

  24. 24
    LC Bruiser, Enforcer of the Red (State) Army growls and barks:

    It looks like Chennai and Madras in India were also hard hit. Karma/Vengeance for shipping American IT jobs overseas? Anyone hear of any development projects now delayed or cancelled?

  25. 25
    B.C., Imperial Torturer? growls and barks:

    Nope, Mark. It wasn’t me. Check the URL. If it were me, I’d have put a picture of your wife up.

  26. 26
    LC Joseph Dromedary growls and barks:

    DAT

    I think you are correct, unfortunately. The toll will probably rise to over 100,000 as the reports continue to come in.

    There are many small islands with small communities that have simply ceased to exist.

    This is an enormous catastrophe.

  27. 27
    Asshole at 203.101.15.229 growls and barks:

    [Buh-bye, fuckwit.  -The Management]

  28. 28
    DumbAss Tanker growls and barks:

    Joe, I note with bemused disgust that the idiots on Democrackhead Underbelly are taking a short break from their salivation fest over (hopelessly trivial and purely symbolic) legal motions filed by Kerry in Ohio to criticize Bush for going on vacation at this time.

    I wonder if it has occurred to any of them that maybe some Democrats hacked the exit polls instead of some Republicans hacking the actual poll results, the level of security, lack of oversight, and existing political bias of the the press paying for those polls would seem to make that far and away the easier trick of the two.

    Well, it’s just an amusing rhetorical question, I know that idea could never flicker across the screens of their pet delusional system in which “Kerry won” (MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!).

  29. 29
    LC mrs heather, G.L.O.R. growls and barks:

    The tits on your wife aren’t tiny, Mark. That’s about 4 times larger my size.

    And the bottled blonde look is always a fashion faux pas. Has she considered highlights?

  30. 30
    Liberal Larry growls and barks:

    I bet that really got the prime minister’s goat.

  31. 31
    LC Army NCO Guy growls and barks:

    That was horrible, BC.

    flushes eyes with hydrochloric acid

  32. 32
    Mark growls and barks:

    Nope, Mark. It wasn’t me. Check the URL. If it were me, I’d have put a picture of your wife up.

    Expect a slating from Didgeridoo (Bren)Dan pretty soon, BC. The Antipodean emotional wreck is bound to remind you that this isn’t the thread for fun and games.

    As for the picture itself, my Australian-looking wife would like to remind you that it was taken in 2002. She has since lost a quarter of a stone in weight. Also, she’s no longer an aeroplane blonde, i.e., blonde up top, with a black box down under.

  33. 33
    Mark growls and barks:

    The tits on your wife aren’t tiny, Mark. That’s about 4 times larger my size.

    And the bottled blonde look is always a fashion faux pas. Has she considered highlights?

    Stop it, Heather. You’d only get me into further trouble with The Management.

    [You're about one smart-assed syllable away from it now, Marci.  I'd really consider that cork if I were you.  -The Management™]

  34. 34
    Um Yeah growls and barks:

    why do you care about this, nobody who died was related to me, ’cause none of them were douchebags.

    did you all get monagamed nooses for stoking stuffers? ‘Cause I need to put my neck in one…

  35. 35
    LCNeilV growls and barks:

    Arrgggggghhhhhh BC that was scary. What do you want to bet? Mark weighs about 90 lbs and is known as the human dildo……
    His nickname is Steely Dan, which for the iilterate trolls is the name of a Dildo in the willaam Burroughs Novel “The Naked Lunch” as well as the name of one of my favroite bands.
    BAck on topic I am amazed that the trolls can be such dicks and make light of this horror ,I belive the death toll will be well in excess of 100k a horrible tragedy.

  36. 36
    Xealot growls and barks:

    Um Yeah, are you for real?

  37. 37
    kschlenker growls and barks:

    Um Yeah,
    Yeah, we care. I’m a mixed breed myself, and I care. They are people. They are humans. You, on the other hand, have proven many times that you are more closely related to water body alga formations.
    Like the good prof says:

    pond scum, frog spawn or frog spittle, insect excreta, substances bred of putrefaction

    Go putrefy somewhere else.

  38. 38
    LC Xealot growls and barks:

    Um Yeah,

    Um Yeah: If you would like some advice on how you can terminate your own life, I would recommend Ruger P89 to the cranium. Failing that, perhaps dining on antifreeze or jumping off a building at least a minimum of 50 stories high would suffice.

    Don’t waste oxygen, food and sewage space by continuing to live Um Yeah. After all, there are monkeys in Butt Fuck Egypt who are more deserving of it.

    You’ve been told by LC Xealot ™

    (this was posted in another thread, but bears mentioning here too)

  39. 39
    LC mrs heather, G.L.O.R. growls and barks:

    [You're about one smart-assed syllable away from it now, Marci. I'd really consider that cork if I were you. -The Management?]

    Spats, can’t he have a pass just for 1 week? The blogosphere and talk radio are boring enough this week.

    If he gets way out of line, I’ll understand.

  40. 40
    LC Xealot growls and barks:

    Spats, can’t he have a pass just for 1 week? The blogosphere and talk radio are boring enough this week.

    If he gets way out of line, I’ll understand.

    Indeed, I could use some more troll heads for my trophy wall.

  41. 41
    LC mrs heather, G.L.O.R. growls and barks:

    Xealot,

    You may want to try the Pardon My English blog. I’ve gotten some pretty good laughs over there lately.

    Dum Yeah is a regular there these days. There’s also one other very annoying troll named Jack Spratt.

    Go have some fun. :) But keep it on topic.

  42. 42
    Lord Spatula I, K&T growls and barks:

    Spats, can’t he have a pass just for 1 week? The blogosphere and talk radio are boring enough this week.

    If he gets way out of line, I’ll understand.

    I must not be understanding.  Talk in the thread had turned to the tsunami – the one that’s killed about 44,000 so far – Marci’s best response to that is a quasi-homoerotic video suggesting something between the President of the United States and the Prime Minister of England…and that’s okay?

    I don’t necessarily want to be the Second Coming of CDR Will, but seriously, am I missing something here?

  43. 43
    LC mrs heather, G.L.O.R. growls and barks:

    You’re right, Spats. My bad. That was very thoughtless of me. I apologize.

  44. 44
    LC Brendan growls and barks:

    smh.com.au just revised the death toll to 38,000 dead and over 100,000 missing.

    I won’t post all the details(I know the Boss doesnt like cut and paste :p), but a precis can also be found at http://www.news.com.au, along with a breakdown of what relief is being sent and where.

    Have a look at a map of the epicentre…I have to check my maps, but isn’t that where one of the trenches is?

    Brendan, I took the liberty of linking it from your post, to make it easier for folks to check it out.

    Many thanks for the info, and for your consideration of Misha’s bandwidth costs.  -The Management™]

  45. 45
    Mark growls and barks:

    Talk in the thread had turned to the tsunami – the one that’s killed about 44,000 so far – Marci’s best response to that is a quasi-homoerotic video suggesting something between the President of the United States and the Prime Minister of England…and that’s okay?

    Maybe I was being a bit insensitive to the topic at hand. My apologies to all who took offence, and my condolences to the victims of the tsunamis tragedy.

    And to you, Heather: Although you’ve now retracted your plea to Spats, and rightly so, I thank you for your support. :-*

  46. 46
    LC Brendan growls and barks:

    Blast, link test shows 404 error. Can you crosslink it to the main page?

    The navs from there can provide the breakdowns.

  47. 47
    Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant growls and barks:

    Brendan, I just tried it, and it came up with no problems.

    Try Ctrl-F5 to refresh – should blow out what’s in the cache and get a fresh copy of the page.

  48. 48
    LC Brendan growls and barks:

    Works now..OH DEAR GOD…60,000…..

  49. 49
    peter bellone growls and barks:

    Go fuck yourself, you spammin’ piece of shit.—The Management?

  50. 50
    LC Brendan growls and barks:

    Australia aid now at $35m and more to come.Rescue teams enroute.Medical units scrambling.

    Australia will today have available four specialist medical teams of about 15, each including surgeons, physicians, nurses and trauma counsellors, to be sent anywhere in the region.

    Mr Howard said by tomorrow there would be five C130 military transport aircraft, including one from New Zealand, in Sumatra, carrying medical supplies and water purification equipment.

    We’re starting in Indonesia and closer regions, we can get people and supplies there fast.

    Death estimates in the area of 25,000..Australia and Indonesia may not have always seen eye to eye on many things, but right now, we don’t care.

    Hang on..help’s on its way

    Hang on, dammit, we’re coming…..

  51. 51
    LC ima mommy growls and barks:

    I heard on FOX last night that more than half the dead are children…this is absolutely beyond horrifying. usaid.gov has a list of charities to donate to. Click tsunami, and then in the blue box click list of relief agencies.

  52. 52
    night heron growls and barks:

    So why do we even still associate with these UN butt holes anyway? we should just quit and tell them to get a life and get lost and move out we can no longer afford this damn UN anymore

  53. 53
    LC Denita TwoDragons, G.L.O.R. growls and barks:

    My mom tells me that at least one happy story has come out of this–a little Swedish toddler was reunited with his father after his grandfather recognized him on T.V.

    *sigh* I just wish there were even more good news stories coming out of there. What a horrible, horrible waste of life.

    Damn I can’t keep thinking about it or I’ll start crying again. I’m already so numb…

    –TwoDragons

  54. 54
    Fraydog growls and barks:

    My heart and prayers go out to all affected in this tragedy, with the exception of the anti-Semite Malaysian PM and his pet goat (make fun of that, liberals!)

  55. 55
    Ken growls and barks:

    I was wondering about the Stingy Comment
    that our friend Jan made…

    Was Jan the Man upset that the US was not
    giving enough aid or was jAnus upset that
    not enough aid (money) from the US was falling
    into the hands of the UN, like the money from
    the Iraq’s Oil for Food Program?

  56. 56
    LC & IB Tiberius growls and barks:

    Well here I am reporting from Penang. I arrived about 16 hours after the tsunami hit and as of today’s newspaper the death tolls were as follows

    Indonesia – 45,000
    Sri Lanka – 25,000
    Thailand – 6,000
    India – 12,000
    Malaysia – 65

    Yes – 65 people and guess what – the muslim government has cancelled all New Year’s Eve celebrations, and effectively demanded that all private organisations and all non-muslim people do the same.

    If it were up to me I would have spent my day rerouting my tickets to fly home ASAP.

    This is just an addition to a number of things that have put me in foul mood – one which I will call for a total boycott of Malaysia.

    More on that once I return.

    Suffice to say – don’t believe any of the stories about suffering from Malaysia.

    Compared to those poor bastards in the aforementioned countries, what hit here was nothing.

    Cheers

  57. 57
    LC mrs heather, G.L.O.R. growls and barks:

    Over 114,000 dead now.

    Horrible. Just horrible.

  58. 58
    LC Xealot growls and barks:

    Read This

    The New York Times now calls us stingy, and compares our yearly donations to the EU. Just a SLIGHT leftist bias, no? Oy.

  59. 59
    Elephant Man growls and barks:

    and I thought the leftists at the Wrinkled Old Whore er, New York Times were concerned about the budget deficit.

    Notice that they don’t mention any donation or charity figures from the private sector or those evil religious-type organizations like the Salvation Army?

    I suppose in the leftist moonbat world, if it doesn’t come from the gub’mint, it doesn’t count.

  60. 60
    Elephant Man growls and barks:

    By the way, our government’s *ahem* generosity towards our foreign bretheren was at an all time low during the Clinton Administration.

    That’s even counting all the nuclear and missle technology we gave away to the Chinese and North Koreans.

    Wait a minute, Clinton got boatloads of campaign cash in return so I guess that doesn’t count as “charity”.

    Never mind.

  61. 61
    Natasha G.L.O.R.&I.P.P.W. growls and barks:

    All right, I just have to jump in… You know, the very idea of our government being “charitable” with the money it extorted from us at the point of a gun is fucking disgusting. This kind of “charity” is immoral in the extreme. The US government should not have sent any money there, in the first place. Private charities, yes, separate individuals, by all means. But not the government. Before anyone begins accusing me of lack of compassion or whatever, think about it. A government is not a damned charitable organization, contrary to what assorted third-world moochers and thieving Euro-trash want you to believe. It has a well defined, limited purpose. And sending aid ain’t it.

  62. 62
    LC Denita TwoDragons, G.L.O.R. growls and barks:

    http://www.cnn.com/2004/WORLD/asiapcf/12/29/tsunami.sweden.boy.ap/

    Oh man, I’m in tears… At least this man will be able to hold his son. There’s too many who lost their entire family…

    –TwoDragons


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